We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I have lived with a man for the last 6 years. The first couple of years were really hard and our exes and kids caused some problems. We became engaged last year, after much heated debate about where we were going in our relationship. He then told his oldest daughter, we were not getting married, (his children had a problem with his divorce, even though he had been separated for 15 years) and then told me he didn't want to get into it with her. Well, he has told me recently that he really didn't want to get married, but we have agreed I would take his last name, and he still wanted to buy me a ring. Just recently on a trip home with his daughter (23 years old) he told her that after our trip to Florida he was breaking up with me. The thing is when I confronted him about this he totally denied it and says he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. So, does he just say things to her so she wont freak out, or is he really lying to me. His birth date is Feb. 28/1955 and mine is September 14, 1971 at 5 AM.
Virgo
Dear Virgo
The comparison with your Pisces man is good but it does show signs of emotional deception. He probably isn't being completely honest with either one of you. Before I go any further however I have to ask you why the whole marriage thing is so important to you. Why would you want to take on his name having your name differ from your children's not to mention the complications changing it back should your relationship not work. Keep in mind that legally you are considered married after cohabitating as long as you have. If I were you I would settle for being included in his will so that you are taken care of in the future. Especially if you have both contributed to your home, household, investments etc.
As mentioned your comparison is good but there is an element that indicates that it could end abruptly so you may want to consider the legal aspects that count regarding property etc instead of whether or not you have the same last name.
His chart shows evidence of sorrow when it comes to relationships and that he can swivel rapidly when it comes to his affections. To force this man to marry would probably be the beginning of the end so if I were you I wouldn't go there.
I don't believe his kids at this stage of the game have the right to dictate what he does with his life and that he is only using how they feel as tool to back out of the marriage.
If you truly love this man, and it appears you do, I would be more inclined to leave well enough alone and enjoy your time together. I believe if you push too hard he will have a change of heart. You know the old saying if something works why fix it.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
My boyfriend of 3yrs (have been friends for 18yrs) has a sexual hang-up. He needs pictures, from magazines, from mail-order videos xxxrated)and watches mpegs on x-rated web sites. But we never seem to have sex! He never wants to touch me. I have asked him if he is still attracted to me he of course said "Yes!!!" He, however, does not know just how much I know! I was cleaning our bed room one day and found videos for the camcorder under his dresser, I of course thinking they're just home videos, put them in the VCR, much to my surprise, they were of 2 of my neighbors!!! Not knowing they were being filmed. Also of my boyfriend pleasuring himself. I did ask him discreetly so as not to get caught, if he would ever or did he ever sleep with Miss. R. He said that it was gross of me to even ask him that and he was never nor could he ever be attracted to Miss. R. I don't know what to do since his little secret does affect our sex life. If I tell him all that I know, all his reply would be "what are you doing going through my things for?" His birthday is October 26,1961 @ 8:19 a.m. and mine is October 17, 1961, at 3:01 AM. Please help if you can!!!!
Sex Starved
Dear Sex Starved
Wow, quite the dilemma. One of the things that stood out loud and clear in your comparison was that his natal Venus really didn't hook up to your chart. That is usually an indication that problems can develop. However, the fact that he does have his natal Moon adversely aspected to his natal Pluto can result in problems that stem from his relationship with females (mother, sister and so on) when he was growing up. He does have his natal Moon aspecting his natal Venus in a favorable way so we know that he does like to have sex. He also has his natal Sun, Mars and Neptune in Scorpio (rules the sexual organs) in an area of his chart that deals with secrets so I'm not surprised that he has kept his fetishes out of sight. I must tell you however that many men and women enjoy looking at pictures, etc., that part isn't uncommon but to not want to have sex with you or touch you is a problem. If you really want to try to make this relationship work at a physical level, open and honest communication regarding one another's sexual likes and dislikes will have to be addressed. Your chart indicates that you have a healthy sexual appetite, therefore I suggest that you will have to begin by making suggestions or buying items that will turn him on. Read him a sexy short story out of an ex-rated magazine when you go to bed or show interest in watching some soft porn videos together. In order to get to the root of his needs and desires you will have to enter his private world. Give it a shot, after all I know that you're attracted to him by the way your natal Venus hooks up to his chart. Be creative in the bedroom and don't be afraid to have a little fun with the one you love.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
It is Easter today...just another day...like any other. Please let me explain: In March 1990 my husband was operated on for a giant brain-aneurysm...he lived...had a massive stroke and was hospitalized and ended up in a wheelchair and months later to a quad-cane and brain damaged. He was 55 years old and I was 51 years young.
I took him home many months later and started to care for him. The doctors did not tell me about the brain injury nor the "surprise seizures".
LIFE turned into HEll.I'm so sick of all of this...I need a strong shoulder to lean on and a kind word. Would love to touch a person and walk hand in hand. A kind word, a smile, a kiss....am I asking too much???? Is there still " a bright SPOT on my horizon???"
Loveless Poohchen.
Dear Loveless Poohchen
On the good side you do live in a country that offers so many social services and it's time you went beyond family and made the next move. God put us here for a good time not a long time and I believe that no one should endure suffering at the hand of someone who is no longer in control of who he or she is or what they do. The comparison with your Leo husband wasn't the greatest to begin with and although I usually like two Leo's together in your case it wasn't the greatest. With a build up of natal planets in Virgo in an area of your chart that deals with partnerships your loyalty and determination to do what you feel is the right thing has brought you to this case scenario. All that said you must realize that you can't do it all by yourself. Your comparison with your husband indicates that you are moving into a period due to transiting Saturn and Uranus that could lead to violence on top of the verbal abuse and I strongly suggest that you get his name on a waiting list so that you can put him into a home where he will be better cared for and where you can visit him without the worry of being abused. It is time for you to get on with your life and although that doesn't mean to forget about him it does mean that you have to look out for your own interests as well. Obviously if you can not get help in the home because of the way he is you need to get him out of the house and into safe quarters where he also can continue his life in good hands and with other people who are in a similar situation. Your situation will not get better until you do something about it therefore I strongly urge you to take the next step and talk to someone who can help you place him in a good facility where he will be cared for and you will be safe.
Eugenia
