We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I have lived with a man for the last 6 years. The first couple of years were really hard and our exes and kids caused some problems. We became engaged last year, after much heated debate about where we were going in our relationship. He then told his oldest daughter, we were not getting married, (his children had a problem with his divorce, even though he had been separated for 15 years) and then told me he didn't want to get into it with her. Well, he has told me recently that he really didn't want to get married, but we have agreed I would take his last name, and he still wanted to buy me a ring. Just recently on a trip home with his daughter (23 years old) he told her that after our trip to Florida he was breaking up with me. The thing is when I confronted him about this he totally denied it and says he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. So, does he just say things to her so she wont freak out, or is he really lying to me. His birth date is Feb. 28/1955 and mine is September 14, 1971 at 5 AM.
Virgo
Dear Virgo
The comparison with your Pisces man is good but it does show signs of emotional deception. He probably isn't being completely honest with either one of you. Before I go any further however I have to ask you why the whole marriage thing is so important to you. Why would you want to take on his name having your name differ from your children's not to mention the complications changing it back should your relationship not work. Keep in mind that legally you are considered married after cohabitating as long as you have. If I were you I would settle for being included in his will so that you are taken care of in the future. Especially if you have both contributed to your home, household, investments etc.
As mentioned your comparison is good but there is an element that indicates that it could end abruptly so you may want to consider the legal aspects that count regarding property etc instead of whether or not you have the same last name.
His chart shows evidence of sorrow when it comes to relationships and that he can swivel rapidly when it comes to his affections. To force this man to marry would probably be the beginning of the end so if I were you I wouldn't go there.
I don't believe his kids at this stage of the game have the right to dictate what he does with his life and that he is only using how they feel as tool to back out of the marriage.
If you truly love this man, and it appears you do, I would be more inclined to leave well enough alone and enjoy your time together. I believe if you push too hard he will have a change of heart. You know the old saying if something works why fix it.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia
I was in a 10 year long relationship with a man that I believe is the love of my life. Things were so easy for about the first year, after that they seemed to just be on a steady course of difficulty. I've never strayed from my dream of marriage and a family. He said he wanted all the same things and recently has changed his mind. He has done a 180 on me and we are now separated. We went through a similar thing a few years ago, but got back together after about four months apart. He was born on January 12, 1972 and I was born on June 23, 1969 at 11:00 pm. As far as signs go, I know that we are perfectly compatible. Can you tell me if I'm crazy for loving this man? Is this a temporary split while he works out whatever has him scared or is this permanent? I've been lost and confused trying to make sense of all of this... any help you can offer would be a great help in putting my mind and heart at ease.
Thank you,
Lost and Confused
Dear Lost and Confused
The comparison was okay but not without some problems. Although your boyfriend was born under the sign Capricorn he does have three planets in the sign Sagittarius and this is usually an indication that even if he does decide to get married he will always be a bachelor at heart. He has his natal Venus in the sign Aquarius and this planet is going through a change of heart, confusion and as a result causing his 180-degree turn. His natal Venus is also at an adverse position to your natal Neptune and this usually causes sorrow within the relationship. In your case it shows up when it comes to changing your status in life that meaning marriage. I also believe that there could be some problems where friends and family are concerned that you may not even know about. Your chart indicates that you will be in a much better position regarding love, marriage and so forth towards the end of this year and through most of next. I wouldn't give him much more time to do a reversal. If he can't make up his mind by the fall let it go. As for you I believe that you should be focusing on career, getting out and meeting and making some new friends and moving on with your life. You actually match up well to those born under the signs Taurus, Cancer, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces. If he doesn't turn around don't rule out people born under his sign just run an astrological comparison on my site to make sure that he is truly a strong Goat and not someone with a build up of natal planets in Sagittarius.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I am going through a breakup in my marriage of 15 years. It has been a very rocky marriage with control and mistrust on my part, and dishonesty and no loyalty on her part, and we haven't been friends in a long time, to name the most major problems. We were in turmoil for 4 weeks before we had an argument and then have been separated for 5 weeks now and have really had some nasty times. Some of the things she has said are very hurtful, and I don't know what is true and what is not. I think that most men would not stick around to hear the things she has been saying, but for some reason I can't seem to stop loving her and wanting her to come back to build on what we have or had. I have heard that she hasn't been in love with me in years- she was just "settling" or "getting by". I do now recognize some signs of her feeling this way, but I have a hard time seeing it being as much as she says. When we weren't mad at each other, there was always holding hands, cuddling, kissing, that type thing that after 15 years a lot of partners don't do as much as we did. I have really come to the realization that my mistrust and controlling manners have to change no matter what- and we're very misplaced with her. Basically, I realize that she came home to me every night, and now she doesn't- that's all that matters to me now. She wants some space to figure out who she is and has sometimes said things that give me hope (false hope is how she words it). She has also said several times that it is over and she just wants to move on. I can't seem to get my head into "moving on" as every one tells me to. I also can't seem to leave her alone and give her space. I am obsessed with trying to talk to her to start becoming friends- but it just makes her angrier and turns into a nasty fight sometimes. I don't know how to control my urge to not leave her alone because my whole life seems to be just falling apart without her beside me.
Can you guide me into a more secure or comfortable place?
Sorry I don't know the time of her or my birth. Her day was May 2/60 and mine is Sept. 11/66.
Virgo
Dear Virgo
The comparison does indicate trouble. There is a lack of trust and communication along with deception and anger. Uncertainty will always be a problem between the two of you regardless of whether you stay together or not. You need to let go. You have a good chart and if you can only realize that you were totally mismatched regarding your values and hers you might be able to move on. You match up to people born under the signs Taurus (not her - I'll explain later), Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces. She may be a Taurus but only by Sun sign. She has her natal Mercury and Venus in the sign Aries and this sign does not match up to you at all. Mercury and Venus represent the way she thinks and communicates along with her morals, ethics and Venus represent the way she loves etc. What actually drew you together was the fact that you both have your Moon in the sign Cancer but that isn't enough to make a relationship work. She is erratic and can change her mind very rapidly. She wants to have fun and she needs freedom to come and go as she pleases. You need companionship, trust and someone who wants to be with you all the time. This connection just won't work that way. We are who we are and as much as either one of you may want to change I fear that the same problems will continually surface. You are headed toward lots of changes and you have to wrap your head around that and accept the inevitable. Should she even entertain the thought of getting back together it wouldn't be long before she would want to move on again. Let go and start anew. I believe that she has decided to do just that. The only time I see a possible reconciliation is this fall however as I mentioned before - should you get back together it would only be for a short period of time be
