We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
Eight months ago I removed myself from a toxic abusive relationship, and put myself slowly onto the road to recovery. I got a new apartment alone, and started a business by myself. I am 41, born October 11, 1961, at 2:32 am, and am having a very hot affair with a sexy 22 year old. It's the first satisfying coupling I've had in a long time. My x continues to call, and wants me back but I am terrified by the level of rancor we have had for each other in the past. My lover was born 7/8/80, and my x on 5/28/74.
I'm inclined to go for the new as much as possible, but I'm wondering how far it could go with us- you know, a child; togetherness. Am I fooling myself? Or should I just enjoy it as long as I am able? I'm reminded that there's no fool like an old fool. What should I do?
Thanks,
Tuutie
Dear Tuutie
The astrological comparison with your new love was definitely the better of the two and I never have a problem with chronological age differences because it really depends on the two people involved but I do fear the fact that although the comparison was good sorrow is evident at some point. I feel certain that you can enjoy this partner for some time however if you want to have a baby, do so for the right reason and with the intention of raising your child by yourself. I believe that you will have to make a choice. You definitely shouldn't be looking back and you will have a transit coming up over the next year where past partners will surface, however this very same transit will also bring about new potential partners and I would advice that you move in that direction should you be serious about marriage, family, children and longevity of the union. If you choose to stay with your current partner be aware that although this relationship does have some staying power it will eventually end and it will probably be do to children.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
Thank you in advance for responding and offering this wonderful website. My troubles for the past two years have been in regards to my partner. I am a Leo (11/08/76); he is a Libra (08/10/75). We met each other while quite young, and have managed to maintain a seven-year relationship through the worst of events. Since 2000 however, I have been drifting away from him, wanting more out of life and out of the relationship -things he does not believe he can deliver. I love him dearly, but I am confused as to whether or not this relationship has outlived its usefulness or if I am searching for qualities only found in a "dream-man"? The strain between us has become unbearable. My heart tells me one thing, my head says otherwise. What can be done?
Confused
Dear Confused
Unfortunately I have to admit that you are in a brother sister type relationship right now and it is time to move on. You are feeling depressed and stressed about this because transiting Saturn is adversely aspecting your natal Venus and you know within your heart that it is time to move on. It is never easy to leave someone you care about but you can't stay for the wrong reasons either. Set him free. You are like birds of a feather but you both need someone different. Hopefully you will be able to put this behind you and save the friendship for that is what this union should have been all along.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
Where to start. First of all I guess that I should tell you that I met my husband and I have been with my husband for 20 years. Married for 17. Beautiful children. I have been very unhappy for a longtime. My husband is verbally, mentally, and worst of all physically abusive. I live everyday in fear, and am always trying to make everything happy and peaceful. I am always living planning the next step of the day out to make sure that it is going to make him happy. I am the bread winner in the family, I have to take care of all of the other responsibilities to, cooking, cleaning, bills, children, laundry, and even making his phone calls for his job etc for him. I should mention that he does work as well, but that is his only responsibility. I feel like an awful person for what I am about to tell you, but I have gotten to the point of being desperate for an answer. About 9 years ago, I met our now best friend. He has always been so nice to me. He is a very patient kind person. He is also in a relationship (not married, but do live together) and has wonderful children. His partner is a very angry person and yells constantly at her children it is so sad. I am very close with his children and love them very much. I have always had feelings for him, however never had said anything. We have always sat up and talked for hours on end when he has come over. About 2 1/2 years ago we were sitting and talking and it came out that we both had feelings for each other. I have never been so shocked, I never would have guessed. He told me at the time that he didn't know what to do, as he couldn't imagine waking up and not being in the same house as his children, that they were his life, and I think that is wonderful. We seem to go in spurts of calling each other, and then periods of not calling each other. However, neither one of us seem to be able to talk about our feelings. We have kissed, and it has been truly wonderful. But I do feel very guilty. I cannot stop thinking about him, I think of him when I wake up, through the day, when I go to bed. It's driving me crazy. I wonder if you can tell me what he is thinking. What he feels for me? My birthday is October 9, 1971, his is April 18, 1977, and my husband's is September 7, 1970. If you could please offer me any insight I would be truly grateful.
Libra
Dear Libra
First of all I want to deal with your relationship with your husband. You don't have one, nor do you need him in your life. You are only teaching your children that it is okay for a man to be abusive to a woman and that in it self is wrong and should have been enough for you to move on with your kids long ago.
It appears to me the only reason you are considering doing so now is because you have someone else in your life but that is not the way to start off a good relationship. I understand why you are attracted to your friend but the comparison although superior to the one with your husband it still isn't great. It is apparent that the connection with your friend is Karmic and I believe his debt is to help you remove yourself and your children from the miserable situation you have put up with for too long however after that it will be time for you to move on and start over.
You do not need your husband so cut your losses and get on with your life. You've already wasted too much time and the damage that the kids have endured watching you being abused are probably insurmountable at this point.
Your chart indicates that you probably should have made your move last year but it's still not too late if you take action immediately. As for your love life - it will pick up during the second half of this year once you have rid yourself of the dead weight you've been living with for so many years. What were you thinking when you married this man - it is seldom I see two people stay together as long as the two of you have when you
