We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I am going through a breakup in my marriage of 15 years. It has been a very rocky marriage with control and mistrust on my part, and dishonesty and no loyalty on her part, and we haven't been friends in a long time, to name the most major problems. We were in turmoil for 4 weeks before we had an argument and then have been separated for 5 weeks now and have really had some nasty times. Some of the things she has said are very hurtful, and I don't know what is true and what is not. I think that most men would not stick around to hear the things she has been saying, but for some reason I can't seem to stop loving her and wanting her to come back to build on what we have or had. I have heard that she hasn't been in love with me in years- she was just "settling" or "getting by". I do now recognize some signs of her feeling this way, but I have a hard time seeing it being as much as she says. When we weren't mad at each other, there was always holding hands, cuddling, kissing, that type thing that after 15 years a lot of partners don't do as much as we did. I have really come to the realization that my mistrust and controlling manners have to change no matter what- and we're very misplaced with her. Basically, I realize that she came home to me every night, and now she doesn't- that's all that matters to me now. She wants some space to figure out who she is and has sometimes said things that give me hope (false hope is how she words it). She has also said several times that it is over and she just wants to move on. I can't seem to get my head into "moving on" as every one tells me to. I also can't seem to leave her alone and give her space. I am obsessed with trying to talk to her to start becoming friends- but it just makes her angrier and turns into a nasty fight sometimes. I don't know how to control my urge to not leave her alone because my whole life seems to be just falling apart without her beside me.
Can you guide me into a more secure or comfortable place?
Sorry I don't know the time of her or my birth. Her day was May 2/60 and mine is Sept. 11/66.
Virgo
Dear Virgo
The comparison does indicate trouble. There is a lack of trust and communication along with deception and anger. Uncertainty will always be a problem between the two of you regardless of whether you stay together or not. You need to let go. You have a good chart and if you can only realize that you were totally mismatched regarding your values and hers you might be able to move on. You match up to people born under the signs Taurus (not her - I'll explain later), Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces. She may be a Taurus but only by Sun sign. She has her natal Mercury and Venus in the sign Aries and this sign does not match up to you at all. Mercury and Venus represent the way she thinks and communicates along with her morals, ethics and Venus represent the way she loves etc. What actually drew you together was the fact that you both have your Moon in the sign Cancer but that isn't enough to make a relationship work. She is erratic and can change her mind very rapidly. She wants to have fun and she needs freedom to come and go as she pleases. You need companionship, trust and someone who wants to be with you all the time. This connection just won't work that way. We are who we are and as much as either one of you may want to change I fear that the same problems will continually surface. You are headed toward lots of changes and you have to wrap your head around that and accept the inevitable. Should she even entertain the thought of getting back together it wouldn't be long before she would want to move on again. Let go and start anew. I believe that she has decided to do just that. The only time I see a possible reconciliation is this fall however as I mentioned before - should you get back together it would only be for a short period of time be
Dear Eugenia
I just met this really wonderful girl. She makes me feel really happy when I am around her. This past Friday night we went on our very first date where we were actually alone. We went for dinner and a movie. I haven't felt this way around a girl since my last girlfriend. We broke up about one year ago. Before that we were together for six years. Anyways I just wanted to know if you think that this is the girl for me. I was born November 14, 1982 at 7:47 am and she was born March 12, 1980.
Thank you.
Jason
Dear Jason
I find it hard to believe that you could possibly match up to your last girlfriend as well as you do to your Pisces friend. This is a match made in heaven barring a few minor exceptions, those being the fact that you are both still very young and that she is going through so many changes right now. Without her time of birth I can't tell you where these changes will take place but sometimes it can cause a sudden change of heart if it falls in the personal area of a chart or it can cause jumping from one job to another if it falls in a professional area. This can only be determined by her time of birth. I do believe however that if you compromise, keep things light and you build a solid and strong friendship that a passionate and long lasting relationship can and will follow.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I (6 July 69, 2.40am) am the last of many siblings to leave home. I was 28 years old and realized I had to create some kind of independent life for myself. Though I love my mother (19 Dec 25) very much, we do not get along well for long periods, I've endured a lot of very hurtful criticism from her, but never retaliating out of respect. I left partly because I just couldn't take it anymore. I feel a lot of guilt and shame in even admitting this because your mother should be on a pedestal. I have a lot of problems trusting because I feel that if the closest person to me can wound me so much, then strangers may be even worse! Though I have stable platonic relationships, my romantic ones have been very sporadic and short lived (9 months is the longest). My past boyfriends either tried to treat me like their mother (23 Oct 66) or like a child (12 Dec 59). I got out cause I felt the walls were closing in and I couldn't be myself. My one true love (6 May 61) is now married to someone else. Is there any luck for me in the next few years and what signs should I look out for?
lover in a rut
Dear lover in a rut
It's a good thing that you are finally moving on and out of your parental home. Once you are away from the negativity you will begin to have more confidence in yourself and in others. You were born with Venus opposite Neptune in your natal chart and this can cause some sorrow or difficulties for you where relationships are concerned. You should be checking out the compatibility astrologically between yourself and whomever you fancy before you become too intimate. You match up well to those born under the signs Taurus, Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio and Pisces. Your chart indicates that you do not have a hard time meeting potential partners but you do make it difficult for the people you meet to get too close to you. Once you learn to open up a little you will find yourself enjoying the company of others. If you don't allow your partner to treat you like a child or a mother it will be hard for him to do so. Be strong, take control and most of all check every potential lover out through my compatibility feature.
Eugenia
