We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
How's this for a love triangle with an international flavor as we were all born in different countries, with two Cancers potentially battling it out? I'm a Cancer born July 9, 1963 at 11:30 am, married for many years to a Gemini man (b. 6/10/1955) who I fear might be seriously interested in another Cancer (someone in our social circle). I understand from mutual friends that he does flirt with this woman when I'm not around and that she is equally interested in him. I learned from one close friend in particular that the only thing stopping her at least is the fact that he is married. I'm hoping that this woman does respect my marriage, but I fear that I may be losing my Gemini man to a possible midlife crisis. It took some doing but I found out that her birthday is 7/5/1959. I hope this is enough information for you to chart us and give me some guidance. Please Eugenia, is my marriage about to come unglued?
Cancer in distress
Dear Cancer in distress
Your comparison with your husband is better than his comparison with the other Cancer in question. However he has been going through emotional confusion the past couple of years and this has probably contributed to his obvious midlife crisis. Generally your husband is a good guy and even though he is a Gemini and they can tend to wander as well as marry more than once in a life time I have to say with his natal Venus in the sign Taurus it does give him some stability. Your chart indicates that you may be overreacting to this whole situation and that could in fact push him away. There is also evidence that by the fall of this year you will be in a high cycle regarding love and winning back the heart of your husband should you actually have lost it to another. Your Cancer friend is not trustworthy when it comes to respecting your marriage. She may be born under the sign Cancer but unlike you she is predominantly a Leo with her natal Mercury, Venus, Mars and Uranus in that sign and her Moon positioned in Gemini therefore the challenge of the chase is probably what she is enjoying. Protect yourself, your heart and your marriage by being fun to be with, paying special attention to your husband and keeping a close watch on who he's with and what he does without being overbearing or smothering.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I am going through a breakup in my marriage of 15 years. It has been a very rocky marriage with control and mistrust on my part, and dishonesty and no loyalty on her part, and we haven't been friends in a long time, to name the most major problems. We were in turmoil for 4 weeks before we had an argument and then have been separated for 5 weeks now and have really had some nasty times. Some of the things she has said are very hurtful, and I don't know what is true and what is not. I think that most men would not stick around to hear the things she has been saying, but for some reason I can't seem to stop loving her and wanting her to come back to build on what we have or had. I have heard that she hasn't been in love with me in years- she was just "settling" or "getting by". I do now recognize some signs of her feeling this way, but I have a hard time seeing it being as much as she says. When we weren't mad at each other, there was always holding hands, cuddling, kissing, that type thing that after 15 years a lot of partners don't do as much as we did. I have really come to the realization that my mistrust and controlling manners have to change no matter what- and we're very misplaced with her. Basically, I realize that she came home to me every night, and now she doesn't- that's all that matters to me now. She wants some space to figure out who she is and has sometimes said things that give me hope (false hope is how she words it). She has also said several times that it is over and she just wants to move on. I can't seem to get my head into "moving on" as every one tells me to. I also can't seem to leave her alone and give her space. I am obsessed with trying to talk to her to start becoming friends- but it just makes her angrier and turns into a nasty fight sometimes. I don't know how to control my urge to not leave her alone because my whole life seems to be just falling apart without her beside me.
Can you guide me into a more secure or comfortable place?
Sorry I don't know the time of her or my birth. Her day was May 2/60 and mine is Sept. 11/66.
Virgo
Dear Virgo
The comparison does indicate trouble. There is a lack of trust and communication along with deception and anger. Uncertainty will always be a problem between the two of you regardless of whether you stay together or not. You need to let go. You have a good chart and if you can only realize that you were totally mismatched regarding your values and hers you might be able to move on. You match up to people born under the signs Taurus (not her - I'll explain later), Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces. She may be a Taurus but only by Sun sign. She has her natal Mercury and Venus in the sign Aries and this sign does not match up to you at all. Mercury and Venus represent the way she thinks and communicates along with her morals, ethics and Venus represent the way she loves etc. What actually drew you together was the fact that you both have your Moon in the sign Cancer but that isn't enough to make a relationship work. She is erratic and can change her mind very rapidly. She wants to have fun and she needs freedom to come and go as she pleases. You need companionship, trust and someone who wants to be with you all the time. This connection just won't work that way. We are who we are and as much as either one of you may want to change I fear that the same problems will continually surface. You are headed toward lots of changes and you have to wrap your head around that and accept the inevitable. Should she even entertain the thought of getting back together it wouldn't be long before she would want to move on again. Let go and start anew. I believe that she has decided to do just that. The only time I see a possible reconciliation is this fall however as I mentioned before - should you get back together it would only be for a short period of time be
Dear Eugenia:
I am a Taurus (May 6, 1971: 1:36pm), and I fell in love with a Capricorn (January 14, 1971 - don't know his birth time). He is perfect for me in every way, and is everything I have ever asked for in a man. However, we had to break up because of a very important obligation that he has in his life; he told me this because he doesn't want to complicate my life, and I realized that, due to his unique situation, we don't have a future together, even though we are both in love with each other and continue to see each other. My question is this: I have a feeling that he's trying to get out of his obligation (of which he's wanted out way before he met me) because he wants to be with me so badly. I don't know if I can love anyone like I love him, so I'm having a very hard time. Do I wait a little longer, or do I continue "playing the field," hoping to find a love that will rival or even surpass the one I have with Mr. Capricorn? Hopefully, you will have some positive words to guide my heart and soul, because, right now, I'm not sure as to what I should do.
Thank you -
Emotionally Ravaged
Dear Emotionally Ravaged
The comparison isn't bad but there is an element of emotional deception, limitation and restriction that's apparent. I believe that under normal circumstances this relationship could work but that is not the case so move on. You need to get out and have fun. Join clubs or organizations that you have an interest in and you will meet like-minded people. You are coming into a high cycle where love is concerned so don't miss out because you are waiting for your Capricorn to get his act together. The fact that you move on may push him to deal with the pending problems that face him. You match up well to those born under the signs Leo and Aquarius.
Eugenia
