We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Hi Eugenia
My husband has a drinking problem. He has been able to control this problem for the past 5-6 years. Recently he has begun drinking again and there is starting to be the same kind of mental abuse as he displayed in the past. I am at the age where I do not feel I can repeat and repeat this sort of abuse and lifestyle. Money is also becoming an issue as he continues to drink. He continues to threaten to leave and I am at the point where if not for my financial position, I would put the entire relationship behind me and move on alone. Is this a good idea?.......Please help, he is born July 10, 1951 at 6:30 a.m. and I April 25, 1944, at 10 a.m.
Stay or Leave
Dear Stay or Leave
I believe that your husband will become worse before he becomes better. The next year and a half will be filled with all sorts of limitations for him regarding health, authority figures, dealing with institutions and so forth. I feel that the past couple of years you have taken the brunt of his obvious lack of control and abuse and now is the time to give him an ultimatum. Should he leave he will go down hill over the course of the next couple of years. Should he seek help it will take him the next couple of years to reform. As for you I feel that the time for change is fast approaching. That you should be seeking help from women's groups and co-dependent organizations in order to get back on your feet and away from him. Your comparison did indicate that there has been love in the past with this man but that was probably a long time ago. There is also sorrow especially where substance abuse is concerned and because of this I feel that even if he does seek help that there will always be the potential for him to slip over and over again. I do not believe that you will ever be able to fully put his abuse behind you and that your reason for staying with this man has more to do with fear of being alone and lack of funds. Your chart indicates that you are youthful and entertaining and that you will be okay if you can only get yourself out of this situation. By all means - if he wants to leave let him go.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia-
I am a (almost) 16 year old girl sag born December 14, 1984, at 12:23 AM. Both my moon and my ascendant are in Virgo, I have heard that Virgo's are pretty down to earth and grounded individuals. I am NOT either of those. On the contrary, I spend most of my time day dreaming and thinking about the future instead of the present. I am more interested in thinking up future projects than doing present ones.
I am also constantly in a dream world. I like to spend my time in my head, thinking about places that don't exist. This type of thinking has put more pressure on me to do well in school and I am falling behind. Could you tell me what part of my natal chart and any transits that are causing this behavior, and how to combat it. It's really getting in the way of my studies and I would like to try and stay in the real world.
-day dreamer
Dear -day dreamer
Your ascendant is very late Virgo therefore you have a far stronger Libra influence in your first house. As for your Virgo Moon it is hidden in your 12th house making it less obvious. The fact that you do have your Moon in Virgo however coupled with your Sun, Mercury and Uranus in another mutable sign (Sagittarius) is contributing to your daydreaming right now because transiting Jupiter is moving through Gemini. Now this doesn't have to be a bad thing. It does mean that you want to learn and discover and expand your horizons however if what they are trying to teach you doesn't interest you it can cause you to wonder off mentally to things that capture your imagination. This transit and your planets in Sagittarius run across the 3rd and 9th houses in your chart which represent lower and higher education therefore the problem is affecting your schoolwork. This transit will pass but not until May/June of next year so buckle down and force yourself to work a little harder. If need be get extra help, talk to your teachers, or do whatever you can to get through this hard to focus period. You are also moving through a period that is favorable for socializing but don't be lead astray by friends. With transiting Neptune sitting on your Venus in your 5th house you could easily end up in a sorrowful situation. The best outlet for you during this period is one that is creative.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
Where to start. First of all I guess that I should tell you that I met my husband and I have been with my husband for 20 years. Married for 17. Beautiful children. I have been very unhappy for a longtime. My husband is verbally, mentally, and worst of all physically abusive. I live everyday in fear, and am always trying to make everything happy and peaceful. I am always living planning the next step of the day out to make sure that it is going to make him happy. I am the bread winner in the family, I have to take care of all of the other responsibilities to, cooking, cleaning, bills, children, laundry, and even making his phone calls for his job etc for him. I should mention that he does work as well, but that is his only responsibility. I feel like an awful person for what I am about to tell you, but I have gotten to the point of being desperate for an answer. About 9 years ago, I met our now best friend. He has always been so nice to me. He is a very patient kind person. He is also in a relationship (not married, but do live together) and has wonderful children. His partner is a very angry person and yells constantly at her children it is so sad. I am very close with his children and love them very much. I have always had feelings for him, however never had said anything. We have always sat up and talked for hours on end when he has come over. About 2 1/2 years ago we were sitting and talking and it came out that we both had feelings for each other. I have never been so shocked, I never would have guessed. He told me at the time that he didn't know what to do, as he couldn't imagine waking up and not being in the same house as his children, that they were his life, and I think that is wonderful. We seem to go in spurts of calling each other, and then periods of not calling each other. However, neither one of us seem to be able to talk about our feelings. We have kissed, and it has been truly wonderful. But I do feel very guilty. I cannot stop thinking about him, I think of him when I wake up, through the day, when I go to bed. It's driving me crazy. I wonder if you can tell me what he is thinking. What he feels for me? My birthday is October 9, 1971, his is April 18, 1977, and my husband's is September 7, 1970. If you could please offer me any insight I would be truly grateful.
Libra
Dear Libra
First of all I want to deal with your relationship with your husband. You don't have one, nor do you need him in your life. You are only teaching your children that it is okay for a man to be abusive to a woman and that in it self is wrong and should have been enough for you to move on with your kids long ago.
It appears to me the only reason you are considering doing so now is because you have someone else in your life but that is not the way to start off a good relationship. I understand why you are attracted to your friend but the comparison although superior to the one with your husband it still isn't great. It is apparent that the connection with your friend is Karmic and I believe his debt is to help you remove yourself and your children from the miserable situation you have put up with for too long however after that it will be time for you to move on and start over.
You do not need your husband so cut your losses and get on with your life. You've already wasted too much time and the damage that the kids have endured watching you being abused are probably insurmountable at this point.
Your chart indicates that you probably should have made your move last year but it's still not too late if you take action immediately. As for your love life - it will pick up during the second half of this year once you have rid yourself of the dead weight you've been living with for so many years. What were you thinking when you married this man - it is seldom I see two people stay together as long as the two of you have when you
