We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Hi Eugenia
My husband has a drinking problem. He has been able to control this problem for the past 5-6 years. Recently he has begun drinking again and there is starting to be the same kind of mental abuse as he displayed in the past. I am at the age where I do not feel I can repeat and repeat this sort of abuse and lifestyle. Money is also becoming an issue as he continues to drink. He continues to threaten to leave and I am at the point where if not for my financial position, I would put the entire relationship behind me and move on alone. Is this a good idea?.......Please help, he is born July 10, 1951 at 6:30 a.m. and I April 25, 1944, at 10 a.m.
Stay or Leave
Dear Stay or Leave
I believe that your husband will become worse before he becomes better. The next year and a half will be filled with all sorts of limitations for him regarding health, authority figures, dealing with institutions and so forth. I feel that the past couple of years you have taken the brunt of his obvious lack of control and abuse and now is the time to give him an ultimatum. Should he leave he will go down hill over the course of the next couple of years. Should he seek help it will take him the next couple of years to reform. As for you I feel that the time for change is fast approaching. That you should be seeking help from women's groups and co-dependent organizations in order to get back on your feet and away from him. Your comparison did indicate that there has been love in the past with this man but that was probably a long time ago. There is also sorrow especially where substance abuse is concerned and because of this I feel that even if he does seek help that there will always be the potential for him to slip over and over again. I do not believe that you will ever be able to fully put his abuse behind you and that your reason for staying with this man has more to do with fear of being alone and lack of funds. Your chart indicates that you are youthful and entertaining and that you will be okay if you can only get yourself out of this situation. By all means - if he wants to leave let him go.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I have written to you a few times before with no answer. I realize you are VERY busy, but please, I desperately need help! My B.T. is 4/9/69 9:31 pm.
Life has been pretty awful since 2000. I've been in love with a married man ever since then -though I've stayed away- but the feelings barely fade between us. He is a fellow Aires 4/19/66 -sorry I have no birth time for him. My mother-9/16/45 had a heart attack in 2000, a source of much grief for me though she is fine now. I lost my job unfairly and was harassed relentlessly at said job in 2000. I was sexually harassed in 2001 at a new job and subsequently left. Then 9/11 happened which was truly the worst. I started another relationship in late 2001 -with a Virgo man- that came to nothing. I've lost quite a few friends in the last year or so, some that I really needed to be rid of but still I wonder why other people have smooth easy friendships that flow well and last forever. I've been unemployed now for over a year and I don't see things getting better. I just turned 34 and I see no upward trend for the future. I can't seem to find my calling in life in any area. The things I want most constantly elude me (Close relationships with family, a partner to walk through life with, beautiful children, a career I love, close friendships, the lifestyle I dream of). What am I doing wrong? Clearly I have lost my way in the universe somehow and I really need some answers. I want to find my soul mate, have kids, do well in business, and have a full, loving, hectic life. Please help me and see what guidance the stars have for me. Thanks so much for your help and your time.
LISA
Hi Lisa
Maybe you should be getting together with the Pisces in my first readers email this week. He is going through similar problems. In your case you have had some rough transits moving through an area that deals with work and friendships and although this is coming to an end it isn't quite over yet. Your predicament regarding your job will change but I must admit it is much better beginning in the fall so if you are interested in picking up added skills in order to take on a new direction or up your earning potential in the area you are already in now is the time to do so. You have been going through a period of change regarding your friends and although it isn't quite over yet it is not uncommon to rid yourself of the dead weight in your life when this type of transit is present. It isn't a bad thing but it does take a lot out of you. Letting go of the past is usually hard even if you are an Aries. You should be getting out and meeting people. Expanding your circle of friends. Trying your hand at the things you enjoy doing and getting involved in something physical that will help you get back on track and use up added energy. With transiting Saturn passing through your eighth house over the next couple of years you are probably not out of the woods with regard to the well being of older family members or the responsibilities that these matters entail. Prepare to give more time to your mother; she will need you by her side.
Being in love with someone who is married usually puts your life in a tailspin for some time however given the fact that he is a fellow Aries and he falls in an area of your chart that deals with social activity and having fun I can see why you were attracted to him but you really must move on. The actual comparison to him wasn't that good and it did indicate emotional mental and physical torment. Signs that are good for you include late Taurus/early Gemini, Leo, Virgo, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Aquarius and Pisces. You are in a high cycle regarding love, romance and having fun over the next little while so get out and meet potential new mates. To go back or even consider your married friend will be detrimental.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia:
My birth date is July 1, 1949 1:00 am, my husband is May 18, 1946.
I am going through a very emotional time in my life. My mother (to whom I was very close died in April) which caused a major family fallout which resulted in a lot of our family not talking to each other and breaking ties completely. Prior to and during this time I feel that my marriage has come to an end. We have been married for 33 years and have been drifting apart for some time. We have very little communication what so ever, and any that we have is mostly anger and aggression. I also feel that there has been someone else in my husband's life. I am confused as to why he doesn't just walk away from the marriage and yet if I had to confront him I have learned from past experiences that he would just lie anyway so I don't see the point, as he is very abusive verbally. My biggest problem in leaving the marriage is financial security, as I do not have the confidence that I could survive on my own. (My childhood was very poor and insecure and I am sure this has a lot to do with my current insecurities especially financial) I have gained a lot of weight with the stress of everything going on in my life which does not help my self esteem and my work is suffering as I cannot concentrate on things at work. I cannot see a future for myself on my own yet my health is suffering daily from staying in this relationship as I cannot understand why I have stayed in this emotional abusive situation for so long. Do you see a brighter future for me and some self-improvements that could help me have the confidence to walk away. And is there a possible suitable companion that could give me the loving caring relationship that I dream of is possible in this life. Can you please advise?
Desperate.
Dear Desperate.
Life is like a lit match. It burns rapidly and then it's gone. For all the time that people waste in situations that are unbearable I have little sympathy. You are the master of your own will and destiny and its time for you to get a grip and move on. You will be in a better position next year to start that diet, join a fitness group, start swimming and so forth. For now you have to take care of business and that means call up your real estate agent if you own your home and force the issue to put it on the market. Split your assets down the middle and start to make plans for the future. Life is simple; it's people who make it complex. You've been clinging to something that is doing nothing but bringing you down. Where you should have been excelling professionally this year you've been vacillating about your personal life. You will have a positive cycle professionally between October and February and you should do whatever you can to focus on your job, career and advancement. If you work hard you will do just fine. During the last half of next year and the first half of 2002 you will be in a high cycle romantically. If you are still with your husband you will miss that opportunity. Your game plan should be focus on work and selling assets in order to split what you have together. Next get into shape during the spring and summer of next year followed by new friends and lovers. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, Leo, Libra, Sagittarius and Aquarius.
Eugenia
