We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Hi Eugenia
My husband has a drinking problem. He has been able to control this problem for the past 5-6 years. Recently he has begun drinking again and there is starting to be the same kind of mental abuse as he displayed in the past. I am at the age where I do not feel I can repeat and repeat this sort of abuse and lifestyle. Money is also becoming an issue as he continues to drink. He continues to threaten to leave and I am at the point where if not for my financial position, I would put the entire relationship behind me and move on alone. Is this a good idea?.......Please help, he is born July 10, 1951 at 6:30 a.m. and I April 25, 1944, at 10 a.m.
Stay or Leave
Dear Stay or Leave
I believe that your husband will become worse before he becomes better. The next year and a half will be filled with all sorts of limitations for him regarding health, authority figures, dealing with institutions and so forth. I feel that the past couple of years you have taken the brunt of his obvious lack of control and abuse and now is the time to give him an ultimatum. Should he leave he will go down hill over the course of the next couple of years. Should he seek help it will take him the next couple of years to reform. As for you I feel that the time for change is fast approaching. That you should be seeking help from women's groups and co-dependent organizations in order to get back on your feet and away from him. Your comparison did indicate that there has been love in the past with this man but that was probably a long time ago. There is also sorrow especially where substance abuse is concerned and because of this I feel that even if he does seek help that there will always be the potential for him to slip over and over again. I do not believe that you will ever be able to fully put his abuse behind you and that your reason for staying with this man has more to do with fear of being alone and lack of funds. Your chart indicates that you are youthful and entertaining and that you will be okay if you can only get yourself out of this situation. By all means - if he wants to leave let him go.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia!
I know you are busy, but I was just wondering if you were going to be able to answer my e-mails concerning the future for my ex-boyfriend and me. I don't really want to get into the details again as it would take too long, but I have written to you at least twice before, maybe 3 times, explaining our situation and my dilemma and asking for your advice. As it stands now, we are not together and haven't been since last October. We haven't spoken since January 9th, at which time he was still not willing to even commit to me to the extent that he had before we split up in September of 2003. And at that time, his extent of commitment was less than I could accept, which is why I moved out. The last time we spoke, I told him for the millionth time not to call me until he was serious about trying to make things work between us because it hurts too much. Although as I said, I had told him this before to no avail, this time it must have sunk in because we haven't spoken since. I work in a convenience store, and I did see him drive thru the parking lot one day, and he has been in the store twice when I wasn't there. He also has called my house 3 or 4 times and hung up without leaving a message. And once he called while I wasn't home and left a message saying, "he just wanted to hear my voice". Please Eugenia, can you tell me what you see happening for us in the future? I still love him and am so in love with him. I miss him like crazy and a day doesn't go by that I don't think about him. Do you see us getting back together in the future? I feel like he's my soul mate, and he says the same about me. Do you think that maybe if we are apart for a while he may learn to appreciate me and the relationship we had together, or do you think it's pretty much a lost cause? Please help Eugenia, I feel so confused. I was born February 16, 1963 at 12:10 p.m. in Dayton, Ohio and Roger was born December 21, 1958 at 1:15 p.m. in San Bernardino, California.
Thanks,
Sandy
Hi Sandy
You do match up to your Sagittarius mate quite well and it's a shame that you aren't together however I believe that it is a commitment problem on his part. If you have followed my work you are aware of the number of times I have mentioned that Sagittarius is the one sign that has a terrible time with commitment. They are the born bachelors of the zodiac and no matter how much they love someone the thought of being confined by or committed to someone is quite horrifying. I do believe that this man loves you and that he isn't likely to find someone that he has as great a comparison with but yikes trying to get him to commit may take a lifetime. There is one hope however and that is that beginning this Summer the planet Saturn is moving into the sign Leo for approximately two and a half years and during that time he just might feel a little more comfortable with the whole settling down thing. For you the best thing to do is not to push commitment but to enjoy this man for who he is. After all that's who you fell in love with. I'm not saying that you should put up with poor behavior or not being treated well but as long as he is doing his part I don't think I would worry so much about signing a piece of paper or saying your vows. All too many times I have seen couples live together for a number of years and when the one finally convinces the other to do the legal trip down the aisle it often leads to a complete break down of the relationship within a year or two after finally getting married. Reevaluate what you really want out of this relationship - the man himself or his vow to never leave you. Please keep in mind that there are no guarantees even if you do tie the knot.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I have read some of your responses to the letters posted in your new advice feature, and I'm impressed with your knowledgeable and common sense advice. I am wondering if you can help me, as well. I am a professional Leo woman, who was born on July 25, 1962, 11:46pm. I have recently moved back to my home state for two reasons: I have just gotten a great job with a software company here and I am also looking for a fresh new start as I have just gotten a divorce from my ex-husband, born August 25, 1953, 5:55am. My marriage was never really great to begin with, but had gotten especially bad during the last two years, as my ex-husband became increasingly more and more verbally and mentally abusive. I left him when he started becoming physically abusive towards me and threatened my life. After I left him, I spent the next year and a half-alone trying to re-build my life and heal from my emotional wounds. I realized through therapy and self-examination that most of my relationships with men in the past have been emotionally destructive. Now that I am getting settled in my new home and job and am starting to feel better about myself, I want to start dating again. Just recently I've met a nice man through a friend and he and I just started seeing each other. He and I seem to get along well and have a lot in common; also my friend tells me that he is a genuinely nice guy. What worries me is that this man is a Virgo, like my ex-husband. I've noticed in my self-analysis that although I'm a Leo, most of my long-lasting relationships have been with Virgo men. This new man's birth data is Sept. 20, 1960 (birth time unknown). Is this new relationship destined to become destructive and emotionally unfulfilling like my marriage and past relationships were, or can I finally let the past go and look forward to new love, new life, and much better things in my future?
Wounded yet Hopeful Lioness
Dear Wounded yet Hopeful Lioness
A person's chart is as individualistic as a finger print. Your ex husband is really quite different from your new man and so is your comparison with both. You really matched up very poorly to your ex and I'm not surprised that it didn't last. Your ex only has his natal Sun in the sign Virgo and the rest of the planets in his chart are spread out between the signs Gemini, Cancer, Leo, Libra and Pisces. Your new man on the other hand has his natal Sun, Moon and Pluto in the sign Virgo with some planets falling in the signs Gemini, Leo, Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius and Capricorn. Your chart indicates that you do have a problem where relationships are concerned and that you are prone to picking poorly or for the wrong reason. You do match up far better to your new Virgo and I do believe that you can enjoy an honest and open relationship with him. You will be in an exceptionally high cycle for love during the later half of next year and the first half of the year 2002. This can mean that this relationship will develop into something very strong or you will meet someone new who will capture your heart. Please get a comparison done if you do decide to date someone new to ensure that you aren't picking the wrong partner.
Eugenia
