We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I know I've met my soul mate, but we keep having conflicts that end with me not wanting to deal with him. He's a Taurus born May 4, 1971 and I'm a Cancer born June 25, 1962. Nine months ago he came back into my life after a 5-year separation, and I believed he wanted a second chance and that he truly loved me. His actions say otherwise when it comes to my feelings. I've gone out of my way, once again, to make sure he is happy, comfortable, and to give all the support he needs. He's done nothing for me and he makes me feel that he has taken advantage of me again and only cares about himself.
I've just recently asked him to leave, because he had hurt my feelings again and that was the last straw for me. I miss him desperately, but I don't know if it's my self-destructive behavior that won't completely let go! I don't want to go through this back and forth emotional roller coaster with him forever. Am I lying to myself? My Cancer logic is slipping away...
Destined
Dear Destined
The comparison does lack some qualities that I would like to see and deception and disillusionment are present in areas of your chart that deal with the home and chores that you share with one another. The unfortunate thing is that once you do too much for someone it is hard to back off and stop doing without causing problems in the relationship. This person is taking advantage of you but you have allowed it to happen. Your chart indicates that you do have problems when it comes to relationships. Your natal Saturn opposite your natal Venus both adversely aspected by your natal Neptune can make it difficult for you to choose properly. It is important for you to have an astrological comparison done before you give your heart to someone. You are in a high cycle for romance right now and will also be during the first half of next year. It is important for you to move on and free yourself of this man who has little to offer you but grief. Keep in mind that as long as he is in your life it will be difficult to take advantage of the opportunities you have for meeting someone new. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, Libra, Sagittarius and Aquarius.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I have dated. I have been engaged a few times but never married (I think I always took marriage too seriously -- and never could promise to do all that marriage entails). I had a loving relationship with a man who had a terminal illness, who died in '95. I have always kept the door open in my heart that I might find a life-long partner, but now I wonder: should I shut the door on this option? I'm not afraid of being alone. I am afraid of nurturing false hope in myself. I was born January 6, 1953, at 5:45 am.
Thank you.
Capricorn
Hi Capricorn
You should never close the door on love, romance, marriage, partnership etc. One of the reasons why you have gone the route but never crossed the line when it came to marriage is due to having your natal Uranus in an area of your chart that deals with relationships opposite your Sun in an area of your chart that deals with your personal outlook. This has probably caused you or your partners throughout life to back away or have a change of heart at the last minute. With transiting Saturn moving into that area of your chart there has never been a better time to find love and get serious then now. Also with your Moon in the sign Virgo it isn't unusual for you to find love or get into a serious relationship during the second half of life. In your case you are moving into a high cycle regarding love right now and you should be out meeting new people. This particular transit can also bring someone from your past back into your life so perhaps if there is someone you still think about you should readdress this relationship. In the past the timing was probably wrong with this person. This is a great year for you creatively, educationally and where growth is concerned. You should be expanding your circle of friends, getting involved in discussions or courses that will alter your philosophy, attitude, lifestyle and outlook. You are going through changes and that is part of the reason you are feeling somewhat concerned or restless about finding love or backing away from it completely. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, early Cancer, Virgo, Sagittarius, Capricorn and Pisces.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia:
I have recently become engaged and have a February wedding planned. My birth date is 4/24/47 and his is 11/13/46. We have a lot in common, enjoy each other's company, are sexually very compatible but my problem is he analyzes everything I say and do to the extreme and often becomes upset, broods for hours and I don't have a clue as to what's bothering him at the time. It's usually over something so insignificant that when we finally get around to discussing what's wrong, I'm amazed at the source of his distress. I seem to be ruled by my emotions and he is a very logical thinker. We both have very strong personalities that often conflict. When things are good, they're wonderful, but when they're bad, it is so stressful I wonder if it's worth continuing the relationship. I've often thought about canceling the wedding but the love I feel for this man is so strong (like no other I've ever experienced), that it makes me physically sick when I consider it. Your advice?
Undecided
Dear Undecided
The comparison was excellent. The one problem that I can see is that one or both of you is not communicating openly and honestly about your feelings. This can easily be rectified by having open discussions. I believe that you are overreacting to this situation right now due to transiting Jupiter and that he is a little erratic because of it. Try to relax and enjoy what you have. If you don't feel that you can handle the situation consider going for counseling because this is truly too good a connection to throw away.
Eugenia
