We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle.  Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?

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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.

For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.

I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.

The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:

Article: From Anda

Hello! Eugenia

First of all I would like to say that it is very good that you use your talant to help others. I like your site very much. I even can say that it has helped me a lot. Unfourtunatelly my problem is connected with love life. As you can see I am born in 21st of July in 1980 (6 AM). It comes out that I am cancer. I really feel like this sensitive person when it comes to love life. I have been dating with three guy during my life. All these love relationships were very idealistic and romantic. I really loved (i guess i still do in some way) these guys. Especially the last one - Arnis (born April 2 in 1978, 12.10 AM), which i can call my dream boy. He really was it until the beginning of this year. He changed. He said he loves me but he doubts. Doubts whether we should be together or not. It hurt me so much - that there are no tenderness or interest left. Now we are divorced for almost 3 months. I was the one who initiated it but i hoped that he will change his mind and will come back to me. He still says he doubts. We are not seeing each other, only communicating via e mail. Even theoriticaly I am free , i feel that he is not letting me go. He does nothing but also somehow keeps me in control. What should I do? If you would ask me- what do you want. I would say that I want to continue this relationship. I would like to fight for our love and future. But I don't want to do it on my own. I want to feel that he also wants it and that he loves me. The pity thing is that all previous relationships also ended in a way like this - O was the one who wanted to continue, but other person did nothing. But i admired them so much. Arnis is so different from me and that's why i adore him. He is so elegent, clever, interesting, also - loving and romantic. i can't imagine better guy. But when he doesn't have interest in me it hurts very, very much. I was thinking maybe something is wrong with the fact that emotionally i am like scorpio - the most deepest and possesive sign. I want to love in more light way! can i do something about it? it seems to me that then i would be more easy going lover, maybe that i would gain more attention from my loved ones because they would see that i am not depending on them so much. Now i feel that i cannot think about anything else than Arnis. I want to have loving and long lasting relationship so very much! but it seems that life leads me in different direction. what should i do? is there possibility that i could be happy with arnis? what should i do or change to get beautiful love life? Hope to hear from you very much!

Anda

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Dear Anda

There is nothing wrong with being sensitive, warm and loving you just have to find the right partner, the partner who will appreciate you for who you are. The comparison with your Aries boyfriend wasn't that great and although he may be charming and all, he is also a bit of a player when it comes to women. He would have a hard time dealing with any women who was too possessive or clingy. You have qualities that lots of men would absolutely adore. You are being too hard on yourself. You are just 22 years old and you have your whole life ahead of you. You are going through a cycle that is wonderful for getting involved in worthwhile groups or organizations that you believe in. This is your time to get out and meet all sorts of new people. You should be building friendships and deciding in your own mind what it is that you really want in a partner. I think that if you are completely honest with yourself you will realize that you want someone who will be just as warm, loving and affectionate as you are. There will be plenty of opportunities for new partnerships to develop over the next twelve months so for you to dwell on the past or sit around waiting for your Aries man to change his mind would be a mistake. Human nature is to always want what you think you can't have. Let him go a

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Article: Nothing to Lose and Everything to Gain

Dear Eugenia,

Sometime during the first half of February 1995 I met this man. His birth date is 4.4.1967. He was my supervisor; I was a phone sales associate. When I first saw him I disliked the way he looked and assumed I wouldn't care whatever his personality was, either. It turned out that he was a wonderful mentor, a really good boss and just naturally inclined at helping people out. I did very well on that job due to his excellent guidance, and I'm sure a lot of the people there, even though they didn't say anything to my face, thought that he was playing favorites. I didn't mind because I wanted to achieve much and get along with everybody at the same time, so my stance was basically a neutral one, which they had loved to call "being professional".

My confusion started when he began acting as if we were really close. In that place where men out number women in selling and dealing with auto parts, I didn't have difficulty eventually becoming one of the guys where handshakes, arm linking hugs, back pats (or slaps) and even shoulder holding were just normal, friendly ways of interacting so it wasn't an issue of unwanted advances or sexual harassment. What bothered me was that we couldn't seem to talk about ourselves except when it had to do with work. He was starting to grow on me, and during those times when he seemed to be making passes at me, I was delighted with it but didn't want to take him up on it, until he leveled with me on what his intentions were. I just couldn't allow it to sweep me off my feet because it didn't feel honest, and one thing I've always wanted more than anything else was to be in an equal relationship. We went on like this until he left the company to pursue other opportunities. Even though nothing officially intimate happened between us, I still felt really sad, as though a lover had left. I was depressed for a while, all the time thinking I was crazy and totally out of my head, that I didn't initiate things. What did it matter if you love a person yet you're both engaging in some sort of power play where it seemed like the affection was with held by omission?

The definite upside on the whole thing was that it prompted me to look for answers instead of letting it eat at me by becoming bitter. A lot of interesting things came up during my self-studies, but somehow I couldn't accept that it would've worked out nicely if only one of us had been up front to the other. Clearly he could've seen that I was focused on my work yet everybody had found me easy to talk to, to relate to, to connect to. It just didn't make any sense, partly because there were a lot of things that I didn't know about him, even though his actions spoke louder than words. It was strange too, that judging from what pathetic little I knew about him, I could feel that he was very familiar to me I couldn't help but think that past lives might be a valid concept. The chemistry and "magic" were all certainly there, but then again, I didn't want to think that his actions were spurred by those factors alone.

I know solidly now at this point that I'd throw caution to the winds and tell him what I feel about him if I was lucky enough to be given another chance at seeing him again. But since I'm not sure about it happening, I'm faced again with the task of finding an answer as to how to make my peace with the whole thing. Through sheer will I tried hard not to let it affect me so much as to disrupt the normal goings on in my life, and I'm proud to say I succeeded in doing so. I've talked to some people about it, but somehow I get the feeling that they don't really understand, and I don't blame them.

Astrology was one subject that really helped me make sense of it on my own. However, I've never gotten any insights from astrologers, except from interpretations I read in books. I was born March 24, 1973, at 4:04 PM. I hope my letter will be interesting enough to merit your attention and consideration. T

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Article: Past Loves

Dear Eugenia,

When I was a child I seemed to be able to do everything without effort. I was a success at most anything I tried. Then my parents separated when I was a junior in high school and things just fell apart for me. I feel like a loser. People tell me I am a strong person, and I try to be, but I feel that somehow I am wearing a mask and pretending. I don't feel strong. I have flunked out of college and am working in a retail job that isn't challenging. I tried taking a couple classes, but dropped out.

My relationships are really messed up. I have been seeing and living with a wonderful person for the past two years. He loves me and is wonderful to me, but I don't feel that I love him the way I should. I checked our romance compatibility with your site and found that I was what he was looking for (79 percent), but he was only 51% for me. I am afraid to say anything to him about this because I don't want to hurt his feelings. In the compatibility report it said that I could only survive in a balanced and harmonious atmosphere. I don't want that to be true.

I also keep thinking about someone who I loved in the past. This was not a safe relationship as he kept leaving me, but I feel like I was more in love with him although the compatibility report looks similar to the relationship I'm in now. He did come back and said he loved me, but I was too afraid. Now I'm thinking I might have made a mistake.

I am afraid to be alone, but I'm also afraid to be married because I don't want to end up hating someone I once loved. Is there anything in my chart that can explain any of this and is there any hope for my future? Is either relationship something I should pursue or should I just try it on my own?

I was born on September 27, 1980 at 12:47 pm. The guy I am with now was born on June 13, 1978 and my past love on May 17, 1981 in the late morning or early afternoon.

I would appreciate any help you could give me, please!
Undecided

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Dear Undecided

You are moving into a period of make it or break it where relationships are concerned and you are also in a period where past lovers can come back into your life. Although both comparisons are okay I fear that your motives are wrong. You are going through a period of uncertainty and you shouldn't choose to be with either right now. You will be in a much better position at the end of 2002 and the summer and fall of 2003. Until that time you should probably get to know yourself a little better. Discover what other partners have to offer and play the field a little. You need more experience before you should settle down.

Eugenia

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