We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I have become a member of your web site since Feb. this year. I really appreciate your web site. It helps me answer many of my questions.Now, I am facing a very difficult situation with my husband. We had been dating for almost 4 years before we got married. During dating, I discovered that he had not been faithful to me. But we still got married later on.We got married Feb. 2000 and shortly after, I got a job offer far away from where we live, so I had to move. My husband and I try to meet each other every weekend, either he comes to visit me or I go back home. We have been doing this since Feb. Recently, I feel myself not trusting my husband. I always feel that he is not honest with me or that he doesn't care about me, love me. This feeling is driving me crazy and of course makes me angry a lot too. I am really not sure about our marriage. I am not sure whether we can keep this marriage together or not. I have tried everything. I could not communicate with him, but, a lot of time, I feel that he is just trying to cover up and not really telling me the truth! Please reply to my question and give me guidance on what can I do to save my marriage?? Thank you very much for your help! I was born in July 30, 1970 sometime around 2:00 am. My husband was born in Dec. 13, 1965.
Confuse and sad
Dear Confuse and sad
The comparison with your husband wasn't bad however it did show signs of emotional and mental dishonesty. This could be based on several different reasons. He could be afraid of the reaction that he gets from you when you are suspicious. Your chart also indicates that you can be just as evasive or dishonest with him regarding some matters. You say that you can't communicate and unfortunately that is what it will take in order to get past all this confusion. You must sit down and talk about your needs, desires and future intentions before you can move forward. This relationship can work but it will take an effort on both your part and his. His chart does show that he can be charming as well as a bit of a flirt, but that doesn't mean that he will follow through. Right now he does have transiting Neptune sitting on his natal Venus and that can cause sorrow for him along with escapism, indulgence and yes even poor choices regarding love and romance. If he is lonely he may seek comfort with someone who is closer to home during this period but if he is a creative person he may also put this energy into artsy projects. Most important is that you sit down and communicate openly and honestly if you really want your relationship to withstand the distance between you. Your chart indicates that making a move back home or having him come to live with you permanently is a possibility in the fall. If you really love one another I would suggest that you strive to make this happen.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
I am a Virgo born on Sept.16, 1970. I been married to a cancer born on July 9,1970. We've been married 3 1/2 years. We were dating for 8 years. Our marriage was going great. But then, I had an affair with a co-worker. I told my husband the truth. He said that he would forgive me and would not leave me. The co-worker is a Virgo like me born on September 14, 1955. He was very good to me. I was feeling lonely and he was also. My husband is military. So, sometimes he is gone. The problem is that my husband says he wants us to work things out, but in the process he gets upset for remembering my affair and starts insulting me a lot. He has never hit me, but once he did because he wanted to know who the guy was. I told him not to hit me and he didn't. He doesn't hurt me physically, but emotionally he does. So, now I am confused. The other guy is married, but his wife filed for divorce. He wants me to also get a divorce and go with him. I just don't know what to do. I am confused! What do you think I should do?
Confused
Dear Confused
I'm not surprised that you are confused. My dear girl, what were you thinking. You have such a good comparison with your husband except for the fact that deception and sorrow due to secret affairs could very well ruin this connection. Your husband is a proud man and it will be difficult for him to forgive you completely. The fact that he has his natal Mercury in the sign Cancer indicates that he will never be able to forget what you have done to him and to your marriage. As for your lover, well you didn't really match up very well. Emotional deception and disillusionment are evident. You have to make some quick decisions in order to get your life back on course. If you think you can salvage your marriage by all means do so, get counseling or whatever it takes. If you decide that it's too late and you must move on do so but not by moving from one hot bed to another. You need to give yourself time to discover who you are and what you really want. I do not believe that you really want your secret lover. I feel that you were attracted to him due to a void you were feeling. Your husband might not have been spending enough time with you or perhaps neither one of you worked hard enough to make your marriage work. A good marriage doesn't just happen. It takes plenty of patience, understanding and hard work on the part of both parties. Divorce does look like the direction you are heading. Whether you stay or leave you will be experiencing emotional difficulties due to the poor choices that you have made in the past.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I have known this boy which I will call J for about 2 years. I knew him from the time I accidentally knocked him down with my bicycle and sent him to the hospital. We have been dating since. However, everyone despises him because he has a scar on his forehead. My father (my mum's passed away) is sure that he was once a gangster and declared that he would not let me be with a gangster. The problem is, I know he is not a gangster and that he got the scar when he was 6 years old through an unfortunate incident but there is no way my father or anyone will change their views about him, despite the fact he's a polite and helpful man. J likes me a lot and vice versa. I could tell his sex drive is great because he always seems to be looking at me in a 'weird sort of way' but he respects my decision to remain a virgin till marriage. Recently, he suggested that we elope because my father is putting too much pressure on us which I admit but I'm still not sure. For one thing, I cannot leave my father behind just like that. But I love J a lot and would like to be with him forever. I really don't know what to do now. His birthday is 21 November, 12.01 AM and I'm a Virgo born on 19 September, 1982, at 4:37 AM. What should I do, Eugenia?
Desperate Virgo
Dear Desperate Virgo
You didn?t specify your boyfriend?s year of birth and that can make my assessment difficult. However, I can tell you that honesty is the best policy and that you should sit down and talk to your father. Let him know how strongly you feel and how much it means to you that he make an effort to get to know your Scorpio friend better. You have an interesting chart that shows great promise in an area that deals with your career. The next few years it will be crucial that you spend time focusing on what you want to be, and do, with the rest of your life. Educational pursuits should be your focus right now followed by a good paying job that you enjoy.
You may be a Virgo but you have a strong Libra influence and that is usually an indicator that you will be much happier throughout life if you have balance, harmony and monetary satisfaction. Without your Scorpio?s year of birth I can not tell you if he will satisfy your needs. I can tell you that he falls in an area of your chart that does denote a strong friendship. If you continue to build your friendship slowly you may eventually gain your fathers confidence in your relationship. You might also consider listening to why your father?s negativity regarding your boyfriend?s background is so strong. Maybe he knows something that you don?t.
Eugenia
