We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
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The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
Many years ago I consulted an astrologer about my chances of marrying happily, and he replied, "Do you really want to know?" He seemed so evasive and reluctant that I didn't push it. A year or two later I met my husband (9/17/53) and we have been together for nearly fifteen years. I have since learned a little about astrology and decided that the reason the astrologer was so reticent is that I have Neptune in Scorpio in the seventh house. I think this has manifested mostly in my husband's struggles with alcohol; about three years ago he finally made a major effort and got his drinking under control. Unfortunately at the same time-- I wonder if it was the catalyst-- I reconnected with an old friend (11/11/61) who is in the same line of creative work I am. Although this relationship upset my husband I did not give it up. I realize that this person is a friend and not a suitable candidate for husband/father (we have three children) but I cannot convince my husband that is the case, even though I have been faithful to him and the other relationship is somewhat tenuous. Is it that my husband is being super controlling or am I not being honest? If I give up my friend will my husband go back to drinking? The astrology books are not very reassuring on the Neptune in the seventh house thing, so I wonder if I am stuck with relationship weirdness no matter what, or if I would just be better off being a nun. My birthday is 4/4/65, at 6 AM.
Thank you--
"Doomed by Neptune"
Dear "Doomed by Neptune"
First of all your Neptune may be in your seventh house but it is well aspected to your natal Saturn and Pluto and yes it does oppose your Moon and Jupiter as well but don't lose sight of the fact that the Moon is well aspsected to both Saturn and Pluto as well. This should give you an overall positive skew on your relationship capability. Now you are right regarding partners being of an escapist nature but that doesn't mean that you can't have a successful relationship and that your current partner can't pull his act together. This set up can be highly creative sexually if that's where the energy is put and obviously you and your husband did just that, the result being your three children. With your Neptune Jupiter opposition and of course Jupiter being in your first house you can tend to overreact a bit and may not be totally honest with yourself or your partner at an emotional level. I feel that your past acquaintance is really not the issue as you do not match up to him well. As a matter of fact it is more like a sister brother connection and a strained one at that. Your Scorpio friend falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects. As for your husband your comparison was okay but sorrow does prevail especially with regard to his drinking problem. With his natal Neptune in an adverse position to his natal Uranus I believe that he could fall off the wagon from time to time. However, it probably won't be the result of your friendship with your Scorpio friend. Your Scorpio however should only be someone that you deal with as a direct result of work and nothing more. If you want your marriage to work you and your husband will have to work together in order to keep his problem under control. If he can't handle it and continually gets inebriated you will have to make a decision based on what's best for you and your children. Your husband falls in an area of your chart that deals with children and partying and that is probably how things started out some 15 years ago however times have changed and he's going to have to pull up his socks or expect to lose his family.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia
I'm considering divorce... my problem is my husband (Sept. 19, 1959.) still considers visiting a single woman, secretly, I always find out, and it hurts me, but he doesn't seem to care, cause as he puts in he isn't doing anything wrong. Well I feel betrayed. I also feel he has other secrets that he doesn't share with me. I could be wrong but I don't really know. My birthday is Feb. 15,1960. Hers is Feb. 26 1960. I kind of do believe they are friends but it still doesn't sit well with me nor do our children like it... Do you think that a divorce is the right thing for me to initiate at this time.. I seem to be running out of options.. Cause deep down I don't want a divorce I want my husband to appreciate & love me.
Thanks for listening............
Feeling left out
Hi Feeling left out
This is a very sticky situation. He matches up to you a little bit better than he does to his Pisces friend. His comparison with her does show some sorrow and on the other side his comparison with you does not indicate deception. I do believe that he is attracted to her and enjoys her company as a friend but I don't believe that he has taken it further. I feel however that she might try. With that in mind it does put you in a very difficult situation. If you nag him you will only make him move towards her. You may want to suggest however that anyone that is a friend of his should also be a friend to the family and have him invite her over for lunch or dinner. This way you get yourself and the children into the loop. At least from that position you can monitor the situation and protect your interests wisely. If he isn't interested in doing so you may want to play his game and find a male friend to spend some time with. After all what's good for the goose is good for the gander. Be smart about the situation. I believe you love him and that your family means enough to you to try to hold it together. If he truly believes in friendship with the opposite sex he should not have a problem with you having male companionship as well. I must caution you however that this can turn into a very dangerous situation especially if you happen to actually meet someone who fills the needs that your husband is obviously not fulfilling. The other approach will be for your children to voice their concerns and how they feel about being left out and that he should be spending the time he gives to his Pisces friend with them.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
I was born July 24, 1961 at 12:15 PM and I have been having an affair with a married man for 2 years. He's born November 24, 1959 I don't know what time. I'm also unsure of his wife's birth date. I am absolutely madly in love with this man. He has had numerous affairs and was in fact seeing another lady when he and I first started seeing each other. He stopped seeing her and was only seeing me. He tells me he loves me. I know he's gone to his mother and told her he loves me as well as I have spoken to her several times. A few weeks ago someone, unknown to us, called his place of employment, my place of employment AND his wife and told this little bit of gossip. Our jobs are not in jeopardy but the gossip is of course crazy. I told him he would have to choose between his family and me. It's not possible that we could keep seeing each other with someone knowing who we are and where we work and so on. We live in a very small community! So...this person called his wife two times. She did not tell him at all. She only told him when he went home and told her someone was calling his work place starting gossip. She has not confronted him about this; she has actually just pretended it never happened. They are as normal, which of course is not the best. He says he can't leave her because of his children ages 17, 16, and 13. So as it stands now he and I are finished. My heart is broken. I know this man is not the best man in the world but I love him anyway. I want him so bad it hurts. Will he ever leave her for me? Do I have a hope at all? I know his sign is a good sign for a Leo...please help!!
Leo
Dear Leo
What are you thinking?????? I can't believe you think so little of yourself that you would get involved with a man (mommy's boy) who is obviously a two-timing cheater with little respect for woman.
You are right however about one thing and that is that you do match up to this man but you have to realize that he will never be true to anyone, not you, obviously not his wife, or any other partner he gets involved with. If you can live with him cheating on you go ahead and fight for this unworthy man.
He is a Sagittarius and they are born bachelors. He will never fully commit to anyone. To introduce you to his mother is about as low as he can get. Going behind his wife's back and bringing you into his inner circle is not acceptable. Put yourself in his wife's shoes for just a moment and regardless of whether he matches up to you or her better he should have the courage and decency to end one relationship before getting involved in another.
He is coming into a two to three year Saturn transit that is going to force him to make some changes and one of those changes could very easily be his wife being fed up and moving on (cannot be sure without her birth data). Hopefully this will be the case and you will be able to experience first hand what it is like to be in a committed relationship with a man who has other women in his life. It may just cure you of your need to sleep with other women's husbands.
Your chart indicates that you are in a high cycle regarding having the man of your dreams coming back into your life or finding a new lover (which should be your preference) this year. I suspect however that you will wait for him and probably continue to see him when the gossip dies down.
If you really want this man he is easy to get - just pretend you don't want him - it's the chase that turns him on. I expect if you do pursue him that I will be hearing from you again in about a year and a half to two years.
Eugenia
