We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
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The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
Many years ago I consulted an astrologer about my chances of marrying happily, and he replied, "Do you really want to know?" He seemed so evasive and reluctant that I didn't push it. A year or two later I met my husband (9/17/53) and we have been together for nearly fifteen years. I have since learned a little about astrology and decided that the reason the astrologer was so reticent is that I have Neptune in Scorpio in the seventh house. I think this has manifested mostly in my husband's struggles with alcohol; about three years ago he finally made a major effort and got his drinking under control. Unfortunately at the same time-- I wonder if it was the catalyst-- I reconnected with an old friend (11/11/61) who is in the same line of creative work I am. Although this relationship upset my husband I did not give it up. I realize that this person is a friend and not a suitable candidate for husband/father (we have three children) but I cannot convince my husband that is the case, even though I have been faithful to him and the other relationship is somewhat tenuous. Is it that my husband is being super controlling or am I not being honest? If I give up my friend will my husband go back to drinking? The astrology books are not very reassuring on the Neptune in the seventh house thing, so I wonder if I am stuck with relationship weirdness no matter what, or if I would just be better off being a nun. My birthday is 4/4/65, at 6 AM.
Thank you--
"Doomed by Neptune"
Dear "Doomed by Neptune"
First of all your Neptune may be in your seventh house but it is well aspected to your natal Saturn and Pluto and yes it does oppose your Moon and Jupiter as well but don't lose sight of the fact that the Moon is well aspsected to both Saturn and Pluto as well. This should give you an overall positive skew on your relationship capability. Now you are right regarding partners being of an escapist nature but that doesn't mean that you can't have a successful relationship and that your current partner can't pull his act together. This set up can be highly creative sexually if that's where the energy is put and obviously you and your husband did just that, the result being your three children. With your Neptune Jupiter opposition and of course Jupiter being in your first house you can tend to overreact a bit and may not be totally honest with yourself or your partner at an emotional level. I feel that your past acquaintance is really not the issue as you do not match up to him well. As a matter of fact it is more like a sister brother connection and a strained one at that. Your Scorpio friend falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects. As for your husband your comparison was okay but sorrow does prevail especially with regard to his drinking problem. With his natal Neptune in an adverse position to his natal Uranus I believe that he could fall off the wagon from time to time. However, it probably won't be the result of your friendship with your Scorpio friend. Your Scorpio however should only be someone that you deal with as a direct result of work and nothing more. If you want your marriage to work you and your husband will have to work together in order to keep his problem under control. If he can't handle it and continually gets inebriated you will have to make a decision based on what's best for you and your children. Your husband falls in an area of your chart that deals with children and partying and that is probably how things started out some 15 years ago however times have changed and he's going to have to pull up his socks or expect to lose his family.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
I have separated from my husband after 14 years of marriage and I have been seeing another man for 15 months now. My ex was very jealous and controlling and his selfishness killed all the love I had for him. He was born on November 5 1955.
My present lover was a longtime acquaintance and we got together as my marriage was ending. He was born on September 26 1966.
I have always had a strong attraction to this man from the first time I saw him and my ex could see it somehow and it caused a lot of frictions in our marriage. Nothing ever happened between the other man and me until I became desperately unhappy and sought him in the last months of my marriage. He brought back laughter and joy into my life and I feel happy in his company. He is divorced and has a teenage daughter. We have a very discreet relationship for many reasons but now I wish we could take it to another level.
Could you please tell me if this relationship will lead to a commitment or if there is another man for me in my future? I am very careful whom I mingle with because I have two children that I want to keep safe. My present boyfriend has known them from birth and has been good and caring towards them.
Hoping to hear from you soon.
Thank you.
Marie
Dear Marie
Firstly, kudos to you for having the strength and courage to move on and getting away from a controlling and unloving marriage and for thinking of your children first.
The comparison with your ex showed signs of both mental and physical abuse that you and your children shouldn't be subjected to. His possessive obsession at an emotional level is something he was born with and shows clearly in his chart. In short he needs professional help to overcome this problem however he is the personality type that probably would never agree to that sort of therapy.
Your current relationship is not the best or most suitable match up for you long-term and is probably much better kept as a family friend. Unfortunately according to your astrological comparison with him there is evidence that he has the potential to be emotionally deceptive with you. I do believe that you have some karma with this man however and that it is likely he has served his purpose. Your chart indicates that you are in a high cycle regarding love this year and that it is important for you to get out and meet new people, however if you are tied up too tightly with your Libra man you aren't likely to experiment with potential partners. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Leo, Virgo, Libra and Aquarius. Should you want to give this relationship more time your next favorable cycle for love and romance will begin late next year and continue through the first three quarters of 2009.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
I have written numerous times and am anxious to get an answer please as my life is turning around very quickly. In January of 2003 I left my husband of 22 years and we are now legally separated. I was born on July 6th, 1959 at 1 am and my ex was born on April 27, 1960. I have been seeing a married man, since September of 2002. He was born on June 13, 1962. He was verbally and physically abused as a child. His first wife cheated. His second wife was on the rebound and is verbally abusive to him to the point of him being depressed. There are many walls around this wonderful man, some of which have come down somewhat. He is hard to read sometimes but has become more open with me because of the trust we have built. I know there is stress in this relationship because I don't see him often and it is hard to tell sometimes where I stand. I know you are going to tell me to get out of this relationship because of the circumstances but I love him dearly and can't see life right now without him. Where does my life stand with him.
Cancer
Dear Cancer
I?m not about to tell you to get out of your relationship with your Gemini friend however I never believe that it?s a good idea to get into a relationship with someone until you are both free and clear of your past partners. You may be legally separated from your ex but with the high comparison you have with one another and the sort of love/hate connection that is so apparent I find it hard to believe that it is totally over. Your relationship with your Gemini friend is a little calmer and I certainly can see the attraction but he is hasn?t made a move to leave his current wife even though you say that she is abusive. You did not mention when she was born so I can?t comment on whether they actually get along or not. I believe that if he is to leave her it will probably be next fall when transiting Saturn conjuncts his natal Venus. That will be when he goes through his make it or break it period so he will either leave you or her but he probably won?t keep you both under wraps when that period hits. I don?t know that I would wait around if I were you but feel that you probably will.
Eugenia
