We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
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The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
Many years ago I consulted an astrologer about my chances of marrying happily, and he replied, "Do you really want to know?" He seemed so evasive and reluctant that I didn't push it. A year or two later I met my husband (9/17/53) and we have been together for nearly fifteen years. I have since learned a little about astrology and decided that the reason the astrologer was so reticent is that I have Neptune in Scorpio in the seventh house. I think this has manifested mostly in my husband's struggles with alcohol; about three years ago he finally made a major effort and got his drinking under control. Unfortunately at the same time-- I wonder if it was the catalyst-- I reconnected with an old friend (11/11/61) who is in the same line of creative work I am. Although this relationship upset my husband I did not give it up. I realize that this person is a friend and not a suitable candidate for husband/father (we have three children) but I cannot convince my husband that is the case, even though I have been faithful to him and the other relationship is somewhat tenuous. Is it that my husband is being super controlling or am I not being honest? If I give up my friend will my husband go back to drinking? The astrology books are not very reassuring on the Neptune in the seventh house thing, so I wonder if I am stuck with relationship weirdness no matter what, or if I would just be better off being a nun. My birthday is 4/4/65, at 6 AM.
Thank you--
"Doomed by Neptune"
Dear "Doomed by Neptune"
First of all your Neptune may be in your seventh house but it is well aspected to your natal Saturn and Pluto and yes it does oppose your Moon and Jupiter as well but don't lose sight of the fact that the Moon is well aspsected to both Saturn and Pluto as well. This should give you an overall positive skew on your relationship capability. Now you are right regarding partners being of an escapist nature but that doesn't mean that you can't have a successful relationship and that your current partner can't pull his act together. This set up can be highly creative sexually if that's where the energy is put and obviously you and your husband did just that, the result being your three children. With your Neptune Jupiter opposition and of course Jupiter being in your first house you can tend to overreact a bit and may not be totally honest with yourself or your partner at an emotional level. I feel that your past acquaintance is really not the issue as you do not match up to him well. As a matter of fact it is more like a sister brother connection and a strained one at that. Your Scorpio friend falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects. As for your husband your comparison was okay but sorrow does prevail especially with regard to his drinking problem. With his natal Neptune in an adverse position to his natal Uranus I believe that he could fall off the wagon from time to time. However, it probably won't be the result of your friendship with your Scorpio friend. Your Scorpio however should only be someone that you deal with as a direct result of work and nothing more. If you want your marriage to work you and your husband will have to work together in order to keep his problem under control. If he can't handle it and continually gets inebriated you will have to make a decision based on what's best for you and your children. Your husband falls in an area of your chart that deals with children and partying and that is probably how things started out some 15 years ago however times have changed and he's going to have to pull up his socks or expect to lose his family.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia
I've written to you several times but as yet have not had an answer, so I'm sure that you must be extremely busy. Your advice is so thorough that I hope you will answer my letter. I have been seeing a Gemini male, born June 13, 1950, 4:30 p.m. We've been intimate but it has been more as a friendship than anything else. We don't live together but we live nearby one another. I've known him for approximately one and a half years. He comes on hot and cold (depending on his stresses of the day). He works in an extremely high stress job. If he's had a couple of beers he confesses that he likes me and that he can't believe that I would care for someone like him. He insists he wants to remain friends, yet when I tell him that I can't be friends and try to let go, he talks me into hanging around. I love this man deeply and have been trying to help him. Deep down I feel that he cares more than as a friend for me and doesn't want me out of his life. If the job has stressed him that particular day he does not want to talk and if he does, he has a tendency of cutting you off, so that all you want to do is get off the phone with him. Am I wasting my time? Should I continue to be friends with him? He continually tells me that I deserve better because he's not very stable emotionally, then when I stay away and then see him again, he's major happy to see me. Please tell me if it's worth my while to continue being friends with him or should I just leave him alone and hope he gets better without me. I'm having a hard time letting go but I need to know if I'm wasting my time. I was born January 7, 1947 at 5:15 PM.
Sabrina
Hi Sabrina
You have to be friends before you become lovers. Friends are there forever but lovers come and go. Wake up and realize that if you enjoy being with this man it really doesn't matter and get over his Gemini aloofness and enjoy the moment. I do believe that he loves you. You match up very well emotionally, physically and mentally - what more do you want. On the down side he falls in an area of your chart that deals with secret affairs so if he isn't including you in the rest of his life you may have a serious problem to deal with and you fall in an area of his chart that deals with communication and dealing with his friends and family so if there is a problem regarding these matters you may want to consider clearing them up before moving forward. Your chart indicates that you will be in a high cycle regarding commitment and getting serious beginning mid summer however that doesn't guarantee that it will be with him. With transiting Saturn beginning to move across the top of his chart this year you may find him more receptive to settling down as well as less stressed because he will finally be getting the recognition he needs to feel good about his work. If you don't find him leaning toward becoming more serious between now and the fall of next year you may want to set your sights on someone new. That being the case you may want to consider someone born under the sign Taurus, Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn or Pisces.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia:
My life is a mess. I really hope that you will choose my letter as I really don't know what to do anymore. I know that you can't give me all the answers but maybe you can give me some direction.
I was born April 11, 1964 1:07AM, and I currently live abroad. I have been involved in a relationship since 1989 and last March I was told it was over. My fianc?e was born July 3, 1965 1:45PM. I have spent over 1 year trying to work things out with her but she maintains that it is over. I believe that she is the one for me and that is why I have tried so hard to work things out.
I am now at the point where I feel like giving up. If I do, I don't feel that I can stay here anymore. It would hurt too much. I have been here so long that I really don't have a home anywhere. Where I grew up, no longer feels like home.Therefore my question really comes down to whether or not I should keep trying to work things out and if not should I return to my birthplace or go somewhere else?
Up in the Air
Dear Up in the Air
The comparison was quite good however I believe that it is possible that too much has happened during the ten years you were together such as not committing one hundred percent through marriage. Her chart indicates that she may have found some outside interest early last year that made her realize that she wasn't happy with you. That may sound harsh but I feel that it's reality. Your chart indicates that you are coming into a period that could bring someone from your past back into your life between now and October. This could be her or someone from back home perhaps. My suggestion to you is that you take a month and travel back to your routes just to see what's happening. You may meet someone who urges you to move home. The other scenario might be that if your Cancer fianc?e feels that she may lose you forever she might be inclined to change her mind. Your charts indicate that you have been going through a make it or break it period for a few years and it was only natural that something had to give. I believe she truly loves/loved you but that you probably frustrated her regarding marriage and children for a number of years and now you are paying the consequences.
Eugenia
