We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
This service is no longer available.
I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
Many years ago I consulted an astrologer about my chances of marrying happily, and he replied, "Do you really want to know?" He seemed so evasive and reluctant that I didn't push it. A year or two later I met my husband (9/17/53) and we have been together for nearly fifteen years. I have since learned a little about astrology and decided that the reason the astrologer was so reticent is that I have Neptune in Scorpio in the seventh house. I think this has manifested mostly in my husband's struggles with alcohol; about three years ago he finally made a major effort and got his drinking under control. Unfortunately at the same time-- I wonder if it was the catalyst-- I reconnected with an old friend (11/11/61) who is in the same line of creative work I am. Although this relationship upset my husband I did not give it up. I realize that this person is a friend and not a suitable candidate for husband/father (we have three children) but I cannot convince my husband that is the case, even though I have been faithful to him and the other relationship is somewhat tenuous. Is it that my husband is being super controlling or am I not being honest? If I give up my friend will my husband go back to drinking? The astrology books are not very reassuring on the Neptune in the seventh house thing, so I wonder if I am stuck with relationship weirdness no matter what, or if I would just be better off being a nun. My birthday is 4/4/65, at 6 AM.
Thank you--
"Doomed by Neptune"
Dear "Doomed by Neptune"
First of all your Neptune may be in your seventh house but it is well aspected to your natal Saturn and Pluto and yes it does oppose your Moon and Jupiter as well but don't lose sight of the fact that the Moon is well aspsected to both Saturn and Pluto as well. This should give you an overall positive skew on your relationship capability. Now you are right regarding partners being of an escapist nature but that doesn't mean that you can't have a successful relationship and that your current partner can't pull his act together. This set up can be highly creative sexually if that's where the energy is put and obviously you and your husband did just that, the result being your three children. With your Neptune Jupiter opposition and of course Jupiter being in your first house you can tend to overreact a bit and may not be totally honest with yourself or your partner at an emotional level. I feel that your past acquaintance is really not the issue as you do not match up to him well. As a matter of fact it is more like a sister brother connection and a strained one at that. Your Scorpio friend falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects. As for your husband your comparison was okay but sorrow does prevail especially with regard to his drinking problem. With his natal Neptune in an adverse position to his natal Uranus I believe that he could fall off the wagon from time to time. However, it probably won't be the result of your friendship with your Scorpio friend. Your Scorpio however should only be someone that you deal with as a direct result of work and nothing more. If you want your marriage to work you and your husband will have to work together in order to keep his problem under control. If he can't handle it and continually gets inebriated you will have to make a decision based on what's best for you and your children. Your husband falls in an area of your chart that deals with children and partying and that is probably how things started out some 15 years ago however times have changed and he's going to have to pull up his socks or expect to lose his family.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia:
I have been married for six years. For most of that time, our sex life has been practically nonexistent, even though we seem to be quite compatible based on our charts. This is my fault, really, as early on I lost my desire to have sex with him; in fact, I am turned off by his touch. I've never told him this because I don't want to hurt him, but, obviously, the "sex" issue has caused some major discord in our marriage. I have tried to rekindle my passion, but I haven't had any success. I know the problem is not physical, as I often have sexual dreams and fantasize about other men (but I've never cheated). If I am unable to get past this, it most surely will lead to divorce. I was born 11/20/71 at 6:50 a.m., my husband was born 5/6/65, (time unknown). Thank you for your advice.
Passionless Wife
Dear Passionless Wife
I don?t really see your comparison as being all that great regarding love. It lacks in areas essential to building a happy and loving relationship. It appears to be more like a brother sister connection that is definitely not built on passion. Your chart indicates that you are coming into a period that brings opportunities for you to meet someone who knocks you off your feet. This could lead to a secret affair if you aren?t out of your current situation. I suggest that if you don?t want this to happen and you truly want to try to rekindle your relationship, that you start communicating with your husband honestly about your feelings and let him know what?s lacking in your marriage. I am a believer that any relationship can work if both people are willing to put in the effort. However, unfortunately I have found that in most cases when it doesn?t work there is a lack of communication and it?s often quite one-sided with regards to who puts what into the marriage. In your case I feel that honesty and straightforwardness will be required. Although this may hurt your husbands feelings initially, if you are living in a loveless marriage I think he would agree that getting help or splitting up would be preferable to the nonexistent connection that you have right now.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia
I've written to you several times but as yet have not had an answer, so I'm sure that you must be extremely busy. Your advice is so thorough that I hope you will answer my letter. I have been seeing a Gemini male, born June 13, 1950, 4:30 p.m. We've been intimate but it has been more as a friendship than anything else. We don't live together but we live nearby one another. I've known him for approximately one and a half years. He comes on hot and cold (depending on his stresses of the day). He works in an extremely high stress job. If he's had a couple of beers he confesses that he likes me and that he can't believe that I would care for someone like him. He insists he wants to remain friends, yet when I tell him that I can't be friends and try to let go, he talks me into hanging around. I love this man deeply and have been trying to help him. Deep down I feel that he cares more than as a friend for me and doesn't want me out of his life. If the job has stressed him that particular day he does not want to talk and if he does, he has a tendency of cutting you off, so that all you want to do is get off the phone with him. Am I wasting my time? Should I continue to be friends with him? He continually tells me that I deserve better because he's not very stable emotionally, then when I stay away and then see him again, he's major happy to see me. Please tell me if it's worth my while to continue being friends with him or should I just leave him alone and hope he gets better without me. I'm having a hard time letting go but I need to know if I'm wasting my time. I was born January 7, 1947 at 5:15 PM.
Sabrina
Hi Sabrina
You have to be friends before you become lovers. Friends are there forever but lovers come and go. Wake up and realize that if you enjoy being with this man it really doesn't matter and get over his Gemini aloofness and enjoy the moment. I do believe that he loves you. You match up very well emotionally, physically and mentally - what more do you want. On the down side he falls in an area of your chart that deals with secret affairs so if he isn't including you in the rest of his life you may have a serious problem to deal with and you fall in an area of his chart that deals with communication and dealing with his friends and family so if there is a problem regarding these matters you may want to consider clearing them up before moving forward. Your chart indicates that you will be in a high cycle regarding commitment and getting serious beginning mid summer however that doesn't guarantee that it will be with him. With transiting Saturn beginning to move across the top of his chart this year you may find him more receptive to settling down as well as less stressed because he will finally be getting the recognition he needs to feel good about his work. If you don't find him leaning toward becoming more serious between now and the fall of next year you may want to set your sights on someone new. That being the case you may want to consider someone born under the sign Taurus, Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn or Pisces.
Eugenia
