We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
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The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
Many years ago I consulted an astrologer about my chances of marrying happily, and he replied, "Do you really want to know?" He seemed so evasive and reluctant that I didn't push it. A year or two later I met my husband (9/17/53) and we have been together for nearly fifteen years. I have since learned a little about astrology and decided that the reason the astrologer was so reticent is that I have Neptune in Scorpio in the seventh house. I think this has manifested mostly in my husband's struggles with alcohol; about three years ago he finally made a major effort and got his drinking under control. Unfortunately at the same time-- I wonder if it was the catalyst-- I reconnected with an old friend (11/11/61) who is in the same line of creative work I am. Although this relationship upset my husband I did not give it up. I realize that this person is a friend and not a suitable candidate for husband/father (we have three children) but I cannot convince my husband that is the case, even though I have been faithful to him and the other relationship is somewhat tenuous. Is it that my husband is being super controlling or am I not being honest? If I give up my friend will my husband go back to drinking? The astrology books are not very reassuring on the Neptune in the seventh house thing, so I wonder if I am stuck with relationship weirdness no matter what, or if I would just be better off being a nun. My birthday is 4/4/65, at 6 AM.
Thank you--
"Doomed by Neptune"
Dear "Doomed by Neptune"
First of all your Neptune may be in your seventh house but it is well aspected to your natal Saturn and Pluto and yes it does oppose your Moon and Jupiter as well but don't lose sight of the fact that the Moon is well aspsected to both Saturn and Pluto as well. This should give you an overall positive skew on your relationship capability. Now you are right regarding partners being of an escapist nature but that doesn't mean that you can't have a successful relationship and that your current partner can't pull his act together. This set up can be highly creative sexually if that's where the energy is put and obviously you and your husband did just that, the result being your three children. With your Neptune Jupiter opposition and of course Jupiter being in your first house you can tend to overreact a bit and may not be totally honest with yourself or your partner at an emotional level. I feel that your past acquaintance is really not the issue as you do not match up to him well. As a matter of fact it is more like a sister brother connection and a strained one at that. Your Scorpio friend falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects. As for your husband your comparison was okay but sorrow does prevail especially with regard to his drinking problem. With his natal Neptune in an adverse position to his natal Uranus I believe that he could fall off the wagon from time to time. However, it probably won't be the result of your friendship with your Scorpio friend. Your Scorpio however should only be someone that you deal with as a direct result of work and nothing more. If you want your marriage to work you and your husband will have to work together in order to keep his problem under control. If he can't handle it and continually gets inebriated you will have to make a decision based on what's best for you and your children. Your husband falls in an area of your chart that deals with children and partying and that is probably how things started out some 15 years ago however times have changed and he's going to have to pull up his socks or expect to lose his family.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia
Here is my problem. My husband of 17 years (September 19,1959.) He has been visiting my ex-girlfriend, I tell him I don't like it, he's says he's doing nothing wrong that they are just friends and nothing more. This causes me pain and our marriage isn't that great these days. I was born Feb.15 1960 at 1:39pm. I'm wondering if I should stay with him or leave. We have two children and I really want to work this out and not feel so insecure. Thanks for any suggestions.
Third Wheel
Dear Third Wheel
Your comparison with your husband is adequate however you are moving into a period of time that could take the relationship either way. The unfortunate thing is that your husband has broken the code of ethics that two people usually have with one another and that is sticking together on issues that concern relatives and friends. If you and your girlfriend no longer see one another there must be a good reason for that and therefore he should stand behind your decision not to see her and do the same. You did not give me her birth data so it's difficult for me to be sure that nothing is going on between the two of them however according to his chart I do believe that he has been confused and questioning his life so he could be planning to make changes in his person life within the year. This is a difficult situation for you to be in and I feel that if you care about this man and your family that you suggest counseling or at least start talking about the options available if you want this marriage to work. You are both heading toward your second half-life Saturn, him this year and you next. This is usually a time when decisions and changes are made. As I mentioned the comparison is okay but as a couple you both need to work at this relationship much harder if you really want it to survive.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia!
Reluctantly, I must write you about matters of the heart. I am truly a contrarian Aquarian - I am going against the prevailing wisdom of almost every human I have encountered, and I am seeing someone who is considered in some circles to be unsavory, devious, shallow, self-absorbed etc....Now, this isn't the sad old story of a long-suffering girl who wants to change "her man". Who puts up with crap because she can't stand to be alone. No. I am a people-savvy person and I really do not think he deserves *most* of his negative publicity. And who wants someone completely uncontroversial and bland anyway? I was born January 28, 1974, at 11:50 PM and he January 23, 1966. So, what the heck do the stars have say about this coupling? And what does my long-term future hold? Will I have a farm, a hubby, some chickens and kids? Or will I be an eccentric old lady, alone with her cats? You rock Eugenia. You look fantastic as a blonde!
Aquarius
Hi Aquarius
Hate to disappoint you and agree with your friends but I do. The comparison shows evidence of deception and isn't even all that conducive to a good connection but there certainly is a physical bond and chemistry that is holding you. I call this kind of connection "meeting your Messiah" I have seen it many times and it is as if you can not help yourself regardless what anyone tells you. Don't feel bad it is very often the case that the person abducted by his or her Messiah is very bright, intelligent, even intuitive but when it comes to this kind of match up all ability to do what's best is gone. I hope you find the strength to distance yourself and move on as I do believe over the course of the time spent with this person you will lose self-esteem, confidence and probably everything else you like about yourself. Hopefully your friends are willing to stick around for however long it takes for you to see the light.
Eugenia
