We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
Many years ago I consulted an astrologer about my chances of marrying happily, and he replied, "Do you really want to know?" He seemed so evasive and reluctant that I didn't push it. A year or two later I met my husband (9/17/53) and we have been together for nearly fifteen years. I have since learned a little about astrology and decided that the reason the astrologer was so reticent is that I have Neptune in Scorpio in the seventh house. I think this has manifested mostly in my husband's struggles with alcohol; about three years ago he finally made a major effort and got his drinking under control. Unfortunately at the same time-- I wonder if it was the catalyst-- I reconnected with an old friend (11/11/61) who is in the same line of creative work I am. Although this relationship upset my husband I did not give it up. I realize that this person is a friend and not a suitable candidate for husband/father (we have three children) but I cannot convince my husband that is the case, even though I have been faithful to him and the other relationship is somewhat tenuous. Is it that my husband is being super controlling or am I not being honest? If I give up my friend will my husband go back to drinking? The astrology books are not very reassuring on the Neptune in the seventh house thing, so I wonder if I am stuck with relationship weirdness no matter what, or if I would just be better off being a nun. My birthday is 4/4/65, at 6 AM.
Thank you--
"Doomed by Neptune"
Dear "Doomed by Neptune"
First of all your Neptune may be in your seventh house but it is well aspected to your natal Saturn and Pluto and yes it does oppose your Moon and Jupiter as well but don't lose sight of the fact that the Moon is well aspsected to both Saturn and Pluto as well. This should give you an overall positive skew on your relationship capability. Now you are right regarding partners being of an escapist nature but that doesn't mean that you can't have a successful relationship and that your current partner can't pull his act together. This set up can be highly creative sexually if that's where the energy is put and obviously you and your husband did just that, the result being your three children. With your Neptune Jupiter opposition and of course Jupiter being in your first house you can tend to overreact a bit and may not be totally honest with yourself or your partner at an emotional level. I feel that your past acquaintance is really not the issue as you do not match up to him well. As a matter of fact it is more like a sister brother connection and a strained one at that. Your Scorpio friend falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects. As for your husband your comparison was okay but sorrow does prevail especially with regard to his drinking problem. With his natal Neptune in an adverse position to his natal Uranus I believe that he could fall off the wagon from time to time. However, it probably won't be the result of your friendship with your Scorpio friend. Your Scorpio however should only be someone that you deal with as a direct result of work and nothing more. If you want your marriage to work you and your husband will have to work together in order to keep his problem under control. If he can't handle it and continually gets inebriated you will have to make a decision based on what's best for you and your children. Your husband falls in an area of your chart that deals with children and partying and that is probably how things started out some 15 years ago however times have changed and he's going to have to pull up his socks or expect to lose his family.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I know I've met my soul mate, but we keep having conflicts that end with me not wanting to deal with him. He's a Taurus born May 4, 1971 and I'm a Cancer born June 25, 1962. Nine months ago he came back into my life after a 5-year separation, and I believed he wanted a second chance and that he truly loved me. His actions say otherwise when it comes to my feelings. I've gone out of my way, once again, to make sure he is happy, comfortable, and to give all the support he needs. He's done nothing for me and he makes me feel that he has taken advantage of me again and only cares about himself.
I've just recently asked him to leave, because he had hurt my feelings again and that was the last straw for me. I miss him desperately, but I don't know if it's my self-destructive behavior that won't completely let go! I don't want to go through this back and forth emotional roller coaster with him forever. Am I lying to myself? My Cancer logic is slipping away...
Destined
Dear Destined
The comparison does lack some qualities that I would like to see and deception and disillusionment are present in areas of your chart that deal with the home and chores that you share with one another. The unfortunate thing is that once you do too much for someone it is hard to back off and stop doing without causing problems in the relationship. This person is taking advantage of you but you have allowed it to happen. Your chart indicates that you do have problems when it comes to relationships. Your natal Saturn opposite your natal Venus both adversely aspected by your natal Neptune can make it difficult for you to choose properly. It is important for you to have an astrological comparison done before you give your heart to someone. You are in a high cycle for romance right now and will also be during the first half of next year. It is important for you to move on and free yourself of this man who has little to offer you but grief. Keep in mind that as long as he is in your life it will be difficult to take advantage of the opportunities you have for meeting someone new. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, Libra, Sagittarius and Aquarius.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
Please help me. From January 1999 to January of this year, I had a relationship with my teacher who was born 24/11/1960, I was born 09/08/1983. The relationship was secret for obvious reasons, but then one night, my best friend told me that for the last two years he had been coming on to her, buying her things, and generally making her uncomfortable. I told her my secret as well and since then my life has been awful. I was really depressed and after a lot of soul searching I decided, with my friend, to tell our headmaster and get him thrown out of school so that I could get on with my life. Well, we told the head and a lot of things have happened that I didn't want to. Firstly, he made me tell my parents, secondly, I had to speak to social services, and thirdly, I had to speak to the police. The police want me to give a statement so that they can arrest him and hopefully sendhim to prison. I told them that I didn't think it would be worth it, but they said I had to think of all the other girls if I didn't. Anyway, I was adamant that there hadn't been any other girls in his past, nor would there be in his future, so I decided not to give a statement. However, today I found out that in his previous school, somebody accused him of doing something (which he didn't do, he says) and now I am so confused. My question is, should I make a statement and run the risk of ruining his life, or should I let it go, and run the risk of him doing this to somebody else?
Please help me, I don't know who else to turn to...
A Leo Lost
Dear A Leo Lost
Dear Leo Lost
You need to ask yourself some serious questions regarding this incident. Your chart indicates that you weren't just an innocent victim, that perhaps you had an attraction to this man as well. That doesn't make it right for him to take advantage of you considering your age and vulnerability but there is also the possibility that you may be exaggerating just a little regarding what he was up to. If you feel that he was the only one flirting and caring on by all means do what you can to make sure that this will never happen to another student. However if you were just as much to blame you must tell the whole truth and let the authorities make the decision regarding his future. He will probably not be allowed to teach if he has been accused in the past. I believe that he is capable of twisting the truth and that he probably did do what he was accused of in the past. The unfortunate thing is that you probably told your friend partly because you were feeling a little jealous that he would pay attention to someone else. I believe that you were just as caught up in this whole affair as he was. It's time to tell the truth so that you all can get on with your lives.
