
We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
This service is no longer available.
I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I am not sure if you will answer this question, but I will try anyway. I was born February 24, 1963, at 12:07 PM. I hope this will help you come to a conclusion. I recently lost my loving husband of 35 years of age to liver cancer, we were only married one year and 3 months before his death. At this time, I don't know which way my life is heading; I am lost, and very lonely. I miss him with all my heart; he truly was my soul mate. I was married before for 17 years to a Scorpion, this man is now back in my life. He says that he has changed, some things yes, he has others, no he hasn't. My question is, should I try and make this past relationship with my ex husband work, or move on? We have three wonderful children together, and he has helped me through some of the emotional problems I have had to deal with since my husband's death. I am confused about him, and don't feel the attraction as I once did. Will I ever find that loving man again in this lifetime, that I had with my great loss. My late husband, taught me many things about how a women should be treated, do I need to settle for less? I don't want to be alone the rest of my life. I also am worried about my late husbands father. This man lost his only son, and I care about him deeply, will he be ok? He says that I am the only thing he has left in this life, who was a part of his son's life. So, I do feel worried and concerned. As for my late husbands mother, she blames his father and me, for his death. Never did she come to see him in the hospital to the very last few days of his life. I was by his bedside 24-7, I was his nurse and his loving wife, until he took his last breath. So, why is she blaming me? This causes me great heartache also. No one can cause someone to get cancer. I don't understand why I had to loose the only man that I loved so deeply. Your time is greatly appreciated.
Thank you,
Lost Love
Dear Lost Love
You are going through a very confusing period in your life and you need some time and space to sort out your feelings. You don't have to settle for anything or anyone until you are good and ready. I believe that if you ask your ex-husband to be your friend, not your lover that you will feel much better about the connection. As for a new love, you will be in a much better frame of mind and you will also be in a high cycle regarding love and romance next year. You actually match up well to those born under the signs Cancer, Virgo and Capricorn. As for right now you should put your time and effort into travel, learning and your beliefs and opinions regarding your philosophy of life, love and future intentions. You are sensitive and you need to nurture yourself for the time being.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I am going through a breakup in my marriage of 15 years. It has been a very rocky marriage with control and mistrust on my part, and dishonesty and no loyalty on her part, and we haven't been friends in a long time, to name the most major problems. We were in turmoil for 4 weeks before we had an argument and then have been separated for 5 weeks now and have really had some nasty times. Some of the things she has said are very hurtful, and I don't know what is true and what is not. I think that most men would not stick around to hear the things she has been saying, but for some reason I can't seem to stop loving her and wanting her to come back to build on what we have or had. I have heard that she hasn't been in love with me in years- she was just "settling" or "getting by". I do now recognize some signs of her feeling this way, but I have a hard time seeing it being as much as she says. When we weren't mad at each other, there was always holding hands, cuddling, kissing, that type thing that after 15 years a lot of partners don't do as much as we did. I have really come to the realization that my mistrust and controlling manners have to change no matter what- and we're very misplaced with her. Basically, I realize that she came home to me every night, and now she doesn't- that's all that matters to me now. She wants some space to figure out who she is and has sometimes said things that give me hope (false hope is how she words it). She has also said several times that it is over and she just wants to move on. I can't seem to get my head into "moving on" as every one tells me to. I also can't seem to leave her alone and give her space. I am obsessed with trying to talk to her to start becoming friends- but it just makes her angrier and turns into a nasty fight sometimes. I don't know how to control my urge to not leave her alone because my whole life seems to be just falling apart without her beside me.
Can you guide me into a more secure or comfortable place?
Sorry I don't know the time of her or my birth. Her day was May 2/60 and mine is Sept. 11/66.
Virgo
Dear Virgo
The comparison does indicate trouble. There is a lack of trust and communication along with deception and anger. Uncertainty will always be a problem between the two of you regardless of whether you stay together or not. You need to let go. You have a good chart and if you can only realize that you were totally mismatched regarding your values and hers you might be able to move on. You match up to people born under the signs Taurus (not her - I'll explain later), Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces. She may be a Taurus but only by Sun sign. She has her natal Mercury and Venus in the sign Aries and this sign does not match up to you at all. Mercury and Venus represent the way she thinks and communicates along with her morals, ethics and Venus represent the way she loves etc. What actually drew you together was the fact that you both have your Moon in the sign Cancer but that isn't enough to make a relationship work. She is erratic and can change her mind very rapidly. She wants to have fun and she needs freedom to come and go as she pleases. You need companionship, trust and someone who wants to be with you all the time. This connection just won't work that way. We are who we are and as much as either one of you may want to change I fear that the same problems will continually surface. You are headed toward lots of changes and you have to wrap your head around that and accept the inevitable. Should she even entertain the thought of getting back together it wouldn't be long before she would want to move on again. Let go and start anew. I believe that she has decided to do just that. The only time I see a possible reconciliation is this fall however as I mentioned before - should you get back together it would only be for a short period of time be
Dear Eugenia,
I am at a standstill in my life. For 2 1/2 years I dated a man born 10/3/60 10:30AM. He and I grew up in the same community and town. We had not seen each other in 15 years and were "fixed up" by mutual friends. The relationship had gone through many ups and downs, at times splitting for weeks and months at a time. I recently completed my M Ed. and needed to stay focused on my goals. He has been a toll collector for 18 years and has a 16-year-old son from a previous relationship that left him raising a son alone and with really crappy hours, the kid is both spoiled and neglected. I have tried nearly everything possible to stay with him, but once I was able to commit to the relationship, his inability to make decisions and be more conscientious of money and time began to widdle away at our relationship. I loved and still love him. In the last year we have lost a child, he has cheated on me twice, and basically lost sight of what was once a strong and vibrant respect for one another. I caught him both times and his wealthy family thinks that he is weak, and that I am too good for him and a tad bit too controlling. We dreamed of many things together. I helped him find and fix up his dream home. Prior to his cheating we were planning a family and life together. I know that I have difficulty letting go in a relationship and wonder if I will ever find someone with whom to spend my life. I thought he was my soul mate. I thought the balance of his laid back approach to life and my ability to solve problems and make things happen would culminate into marriage. We are both seeing other people 3 months after the split and recently were drawn together by finances and we ended up making love. I am confused and tormented by what could have but can never be. We often said that if he didn't have his son we would already have been married. He is the kind of man that can't be left alone, and I refused to live with him until he got a grip of his son's law breaking/disrespectful behavior (I have a 9 year old) before living together and being a family. We have had quite a dramatic relationship. The disrespect was making me miserable. Do you think he could my soul mate? Am I foolish to believe he could ever evolve into a stronger man and be happy with a good woman like me? I can't believe I still want him after everything we have been through. My head says run, but my heart says "maybe someday" My DOB is 9/11/61 at 11:59 PM. Will I ever find a soul mate, and does he exist? I am dating, but unable to find anyone who makes me feel hope.
An empty - Gypsyheart
Dear Gypsyheart
I think you should focus your time and energy on your son, your own home, travel, self-improvement and socializing. You have latched on to a man who has no backbone and although he probably is an attractive package due to his family prominence you are best not to waste any more time on the prospect of spending the rest of your life with him. Your comparison indicates that this man will bring you sorrow. The past three years this mans chart has experienced all sorts of uncertainties and weaknesses that have resulted in his sons need to do whatever it takes to get some attention. This man is not likely to get his act together in the near future therefore you should get on with your life and forget about what might have been. Your comparison with him was not that great and I know that you can do much better. You do not need a weak man but instead one strong enough to balance your need to control. Although the sign Scorpio is definitely a sign that draws you, this particular Scorpio is not the one. You also match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Taurus and Gemini. You should always run a comparison through our compatibility service before you let someone new capture your heart. Your chart indicates that if you get out and do things that you enjoy over the course of th