
We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
When I was a child I seemed to be able to do everything without effort. I was a success at most anything I tried. Then my parents separated when I was a junior in high school and things just fell apart for me. I feel like a loser. People tell me I am a strong person, and I try to be, but I feel that somehow I am wearing a mask and pretending. I don't feel strong. I have flunked out of college and am working in a retail job that isn't challenging. I tried taking a couple classes, but dropped out.
My relationships are really messed up. I have been seeing and living with a wonderful person for the past two years. He loves me and is wonderful to me, but I don't feel that I love him the way I should. I checked our romance compatibility with your site and found that I was what he was looking for (79 percent), but he was only 51% for me. I am afraid to say anything to him about this because I don't want to hurt his feelings. In the compatibility report it said that I could only survive in a balanced and harmonious atmosphere. I don't want that to be true.
I also keep thinking about someone who I loved in the past. This was not a safe relationship as he kept leaving me, but I feel like I was more in love with him although the compatibility report looks similar to the relationship I'm in now. He did come back and said he loved me, but I was too afraid. Now I'm thinking I might have made a mistake.
I am afraid to be alone, but I'm also afraid to be married because I don't want to end up hating someone I once loved. Is there anything in my chart that can explain any of this and is there any hope for my future? Is either relationship something I should pursue or should I just try it on my own?
I was born on September 27, 1980 at 12:47 pm. The guy I am with now was born on June 13, 1978 and my past love on May 17, 1981 in the late morning or early afternoon.
I would appreciate any help you could give me, please!
Undecided
Dear Undecided
You are moving into a period of make it or break it where relationships are concerned and you are also in a period where past lovers can come back into your life. Although both comparisons are okay I fear that your motives are wrong. You are going through a period of uncertainty and you shouldn't choose to be with either right now. You will be in a much better position at the end of 2002 and the summer and fall of 2003. Until that time you should probably get to know yourself a little better. Discover what other partners have to offer and play the field a little. You need more experience before you should settle down.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I (6 July 69, 2.40am) am the last of many siblings to leave home. I was 28 years old and realized I had to create some kind of independent life for myself. Though I love my mother (19 Dec 25) very much, we do not get along well for long periods, I've endured a lot of very hurtful criticism from her, but never retaliating out of respect. I left partly because I just couldn't take it anymore. I feel a lot of guilt and shame in even admitting this because your mother should be on a pedestal. I have a lot of problems trusting because I feel that if the closest person to me can wound me so much, then strangers may be even worse! Though I have stable platonic relationships, my romantic ones have been very sporadic and short lived (9 months is the longest). My past boyfriends either tried to treat me like their mother (23 Oct 66) or like a child (12 Dec 59). I got out cause I felt the walls were closing in and I couldn't be myself. My one true love (6 May 61) is now married to someone else. Is there any luck for me in the next few years and what signs should I look out for?
lover in a rut
Dear lover in a rut
It's a good thing that you are finally moving on and out of your parental home. Once you are away from the negativity you will begin to have more confidence in yourself and in others. You were born with Venus opposite Neptune in your natal chart and this can cause some sorrow or difficulties for you where relationships are concerned. You should be checking out the compatibility astrologically between yourself and whomever you fancy before you become too intimate. You match up well to those born under the signs Taurus, Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio and Pisces. Your chart indicates that you do not have a hard time meeting potential partners but you do make it difficult for the people you meet to get too close to you. Once you learn to open up a little you will find yourself enjoying the company of others. If you don't allow your partner to treat you like a child or a mother it will be hard for him to do so. Be strong, take control and most of all check every potential lover out through my compatibility feature.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
Many years ago I consulted an astrologer about my chances of marrying happily, and he replied, "Do you really want to know?" He seemed so evasive and reluctant that I didn't push it. A year or two later I met my husband (9/17/53) and we have been together for nearly fifteen years. I have since learned a little about astrology and decided that the reason the astrologer was so reticent is that I have Neptune in Scorpio in the seventh house. I think this has manifested mostly in my husband's struggles with alcohol; about three years ago he finally made a major effort and got his drinking under control. Unfortunately at the same time-- I wonder if it was the catalyst-- I reconnected with an old friend (11/11/61) who is in the same line of creative work I am. Although this relationship upset my husband I did not give it up. I realize that this person is a friend and not a suitable candidate for husband/father (we have three children) but I cannot convince my husband that is the case, even though I have been faithful to him and the other relationship is somewhat tenuous. Is it that my husband is being super controlling or am I not being honest? If I give up my friend will my husband go back to drinking? The astrology books are not very reassuring on the Neptune in the seventh house thing, so I wonder if I am stuck with relationship weirdness no matter what, or if I would just be better off being a nun. My birthday is 4/4/65, at 6 AM.
Thank you--
"Doomed by Neptune"
Dear "Doomed by Neptune"
First of all your Neptune may be in your seventh house but it is well aspected to your natal Saturn and Pluto and yes it does oppose your Moon and Jupiter as well but don't lose sight of the fact that the Moon is well aspsected to both Saturn and Pluto as well. This should give you an overall positive skew on your relationship capability. Now you are right regarding partners being of an escapist nature but that doesn't mean that you can't have a successful relationship and that your current partner can't pull his act together. This set up can be highly creative sexually if that's where the energy is put and obviously you and your husband did just that, the result being your three children. With your Neptune Jupiter opposition and of course Jupiter being in your first house you can tend to overreact a bit and may not be totally honest with yourself or your partner at an emotional level. I feel that your past acquaintance is really not the issue as you do not match up to him well. As a matter of fact it is more like a sister brother connection and a strained one at that. Your Scorpio friend falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects. As for your husband your comparison was okay but sorrow does prevail especially with regard to his drinking problem. With his natal Neptune in an adverse position to his natal Uranus I believe that he could fall off the wagon from time to time. However, it probably won't be the result of your friendship with your Scorpio friend. Your Scorpio however should only be someone that you deal with as a direct result of work and nothing more. If you want your marriage to work you and your husband will have to work together in order to keep his problem under control. If he can't handle it and continually gets inebriated you will have to make a decision based on what's best for you and your children. Your husband falls in an area of your chart that deals with children and partying and that is probably how things started out some 15 years ago however times have changed and he's going to have to pull up his socks or expect to lose his family.
Eugenia