We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
When I was a child I seemed to be able to do everything without effort. I was a success at most anything I tried. Then my parents separated when I was a junior in high school and things just fell apart for me. I feel like a loser. People tell me I am a strong person, and I try to be, but I feel that somehow I am wearing a mask and pretending. I don't feel strong. I have flunked out of college and am working in a retail job that isn't challenging. I tried taking a couple classes, but dropped out.
My relationships are really messed up. I have been seeing and living with a wonderful person for the past two years. He loves me and is wonderful to me, but I don't feel that I love him the way I should. I checked our romance compatibility with your site and found that I was what he was looking for (79 percent), but he was only 51% for me. I am afraid to say anything to him about this because I don't want to hurt his feelings. In the compatibility report it said that I could only survive in a balanced and harmonious atmosphere. I don't want that to be true.
I also keep thinking about someone who I loved in the past. This was not a safe relationship as he kept leaving me, but I feel like I was more in love with him although the compatibility report looks similar to the relationship I'm in now. He did come back and said he loved me, but I was too afraid. Now I'm thinking I might have made a mistake.
I am afraid to be alone, but I'm also afraid to be married because I don't want to end up hating someone I once loved. Is there anything in my chart that can explain any of this and is there any hope for my future? Is either relationship something I should pursue or should I just try it on my own?
I was born on September 27, 1980 at 12:47 pm. The guy I am with now was born on June 13, 1978 and my past love on May 17, 1981 in the late morning or early afternoon.
I would appreciate any help you could give me, please!
Undecided
Dear Undecided
You are moving into a period of make it or break it where relationships are concerned and you are also in a period where past lovers can come back into your life. Although both comparisons are okay I fear that your motives are wrong. You are going through a period of uncertainty and you shouldn't choose to be with either right now. You will be in a much better position at the end of 2002 and the summer and fall of 2003. Until that time you should probably get to know yourself a little better. Discover what other partners have to offer and play the field a little. You need more experience before you should settle down.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I feel so hopeless at this point in my relationship and was looking for some guidance. My husband and I have been married 20 years and together 22 years. Last year he just upped and left the house and said he wanted a divorce. We've had our ups and downs but basically a good relationship and especially a good friendship, or so I thought. After being gone for 9 months he decided he wanted to make a go of it and came back into my life.
Please understand that when he left I was so distraught and even considered suicide. I allowed him back in my life and we agreed we'd take it one day at a time. It's only been two months and he has just informed me that he cannot stand the guilt he's feeling and had to confess that he feels like he came back for all the wrong reasons. I have been to counseling and he has agreed to also go talk to someone. I just can't tell you how sick I feel right now. I can't believe he would give up after only two months knowing we have so much to work through. I love this man with all my heart and know in my heart we can get through this.
I was wondering if there is any way to help me in my sole search for the right path. We've been told several times that we were meant to be together, but I know that doesn't mean it will happen or even be easy.
His birthday is 4/24/58 and mine is 12/6/58. My birth hour is 4:08am but I don't know his. I don't know what to do and cannot emotionally handle another broken heart. Could things work out between us if we put forth the effort and will he put forth the effort needed to get us through this?
AKA Broken Hearted
Dear AKA Broken Hearted
You do have a decent comparison with your husband both mentally and emotionally however physically there do appear to be some problems. Your chart indicates that your relationship will be unstable until mid February however deception and disillusionment will continue to haunt you right through next year. The final outcome will be apparent October/November of next year. You do have to give this relationship a chance but unless both of you do so it isn't likely to work. Your husband's chart denotes that he is totally confused about his personal life and that isn't about to change any time soon. He is likely to experience a change of heart around May/June of next year. The one thing that I don't want you to do is to be a doormat. Opportunities for romance can be yours in May/June so if your husband isn't trying to rekindle his relationship with you at that time don't be afraid to get out and meet someone new. It will also be the time to clear up any legal matters or financial concerns. You have to start looking out for yourself. It would be nice if you could to sort through your differences but if you can't be prepared to do what's best for you. If you don't communicate with one another or you both see different therapists you may never figure out what the real problem is. You have to work together in order to come to a workable agreement.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia:
I have been married for six years. For most of that time, our sex life has been practically nonexistent, even though we seem to be quite compatible based on our charts. This is my fault, really, as early on I lost my desire to have sex with him; in fact, I am turned off by his touch. I've never told him this because I don't want to hurt him, but, obviously, the "sex" issue has caused some major discord in our marriage. I have tried to rekindle my passion, but I haven't had any success. I know the problem is not physical, as I often have sexual dreams and fantasize about other men (but I've never cheated). If I am unable to get past this, it most surely will lead to divorce. I was born 11/20/71 at 6:50 a.m., my husband was born 5/6/65, (time unknown). Thank you for your advice.
Passionless Wife
Dear Passionless Wife
I don?t really see your comparison as being all that great regarding love. It lacks in areas essential to building a happy and loving relationship. It appears to be more like a brother sister connection that is definitely not built on passion. Your chart indicates that you are coming into a period that brings opportunities for you to meet someone who knocks you off your feet. This could lead to a secret affair if you aren?t out of your current situation. I suggest that if you don?t want this to happen and you truly want to try to rekindle your relationship, that you start communicating with your husband honestly about your feelings and let him know what?s lacking in your marriage. I am a believer that any relationship can work if both people are willing to put in the effort. However, unfortunately I have found that in most cases when it doesn?t work there is a lack of communication and it?s often quite one-sided with regards to who puts what into the marriage. In your case I feel that honesty and straightforwardness will be required. Although this may hurt your husbands feelings initially, if you are living in a loveless marriage I think he would agree that getting help or splitting up would be preferable to the nonexistent connection that you have right now.
Eugenia
