We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle.  Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?

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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.

For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.

I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.

The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:

Article: A Broken Heart Seeks Advice

Hi there Eugenia,

My birth date is July 15, 1979, at 3:15 PM. I've been involved in a gay relationship with another guy (Birth date: 03 June 1977 05:15 PM) for the last 3 months. When we started our relationship he was living with his ex and he said it was a "living arrangement"...I believed him. Anyway during our relationship he would rarely visit me (we stay in different cities) and behave oddly if I ran into him in a public place with his ex around. Eventually he came clean with me (his friends forced him to tell the truth) and it turned out that he'd been having a relationship with the "ex" at the same time as me, and recently started seeing yet another guy. After all of this and around 2 weeks of deciding what to do, I called him and we broke it off. Leaving me very hurt and confused...He still says that he loves me and everything we had was real, but I'm at a loss to describe the pain this has caused me. Especially since him and the new guy are now fully in a relationship. I'd really like some advice on this situation, and if I should be foolish enough to still hope that one day we will get back together...

Thnx,
Broken

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Dear Broken

You met your messiah, in other words you met someone who captured your heart and you had no power to pry yourself from him. The comparison was so powerful between you. This Gemini is just as bad for you as he is good. You can't however allow yourself to be played with this way. It isn't good for your self-esteem. You are too proud to forgive and you shouldn't forget. Playing sexual games can be dangerous and it's obvious that your Gemini friend doesn't care enough about any of his partners to be open and honest about his goings on. Unfortunately he probably will slip in and out of your life until you put a stop to it. I strongly suggest that you put up your guard and move on. You will be coming into a transit over the summer as well as during the first half of next year that does indicate that people from your past will want back into your life. You must remember that he will not change. He is not a lover who can be true to one person, let alone himself. If you go with him you will be risking your emotional and your physical well-being. During this transit, it can also mean that you will have some new people come into your life. However, if someone is preoccupying your life you aren't likely to have the opportunity to start a new relationship. I know that your Gemini friend is exciting and adventurous and that you have plenty of chemistry with him but that will not be enough in this case. Please consider making yourself a list of all the reasons why this person hurt you, and why you should not be together and carry it with you. When he tries to come back into your life read your notes. Hopefully you will find the strength to say no to him. You do match up to, and attract, the sign Gemini. Nonetheless Gemini's are not good for you in general due to your natal Neptune placement. You should consider a Leo or Aquarius for future relationships.

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Article: Walking Away

Dear Eugenia,

I have two babies, a 36-month-old boy and a 20-month old girl. Their father has been an addiction of mine for four years. Just when I think I have finally made it to a place in my life where I can let go of him; I am pregnant again. I am torn between continuing in this one-sided relationship for the sake of our children, who adore him, while having another baby; or not; and disconnecting from him completely. I was born 7/6/65 at 5:30 EST and he was born 1/20/63 at 8:30p.m. PST. I fear that if I don?t walk away soon, I never will; but I feel like it is better the devil you know, then the devil you don?t know. I would really appreciate some guidance. I am afraid I won?t make the best decision for my two babies. He isn?t very kind to me; he is very abusive, distrustful and threatening. It has taken a long time and a lot of distance to break down, a little, his control of my emotions and feelings of self worth. I really need some ones insight into his character strengths and weaknesses and what is in store for our future.

Please respond

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Dear Please respond

I can see your dilemma. I call this set up meeting your messiah. In other words you are so connected to this man you can?t help yourself and yet he is not good for you. The comparison was quite something, filled with love, hate, passion, deception, sorrow and so on. It is apparent that when he is feeling guilty, because he has done something that he probably shouldn?t, like cheats on you, he becomes abusive to cover it up. It is important that you don?t raise your children in this setting or they will grow up thinking that this is the way people should treat one another. I do not believe that your love is one-sided but I do believe that this man is not good for you. You are coming into a period that will be even more difficult where relationships are concerned. You can use this period to take further abuse from him or you can use this period to get out on your own with your children and start a new life. Neither will be easy but the later will certainly lead to a better future for you and your children. Opportunities for you to meet someone else are apparent and I believe you should do just that. It will help you forget about your abusive partner. Your chart also indicates that you are not likely to be with just one partner throughout your life. There is also evidence in your chart that you do attract men who will try to control and confine you. I suggest that you have an astrological evaluation done prior to giving your heart to the next man you want to become intimate with. Build on friendship first and you?ll stand a better chance of developing a long lasting union. You are coming into a high cycle where work and money are concerned. I feel confident that if you put your energy into your work, your children, your new home and meeting new friends and lovers you will find that your life will unfold quite nicely as we go into the year 2001. It sometimes helps to make a list of all the reasons that you feel that you should not be with your ex. Like the things he brings out in you that you don?t like and the things he does that you can?t live with. Every time he tries to contact you or you want to contact him pull out your list and read it just to remind yourself why you left him.

Eugenia

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Article: From Virgo

Dear Eugenia,

I have lived with a man for the last 6 years. The first couple of years were really hard and our exes and kids caused some problems. We became engaged last year, after much heated debate about where we were going in our relationship. He then told his oldest daughter, we were not getting married, (his children had a problem with his divorce, even though he had been separated for 15 years) and then told me he didn't want to get into it with her. Well, he has told me recently that he really didn't want to get married, but we have agreed I would take his last name, and he still wanted to buy me a ring. Just recently on a trip home with his daughter (23 years old) he told her that after our trip to Florida he was breaking up with me. The thing is when I confronted him about this he totally denied it and says he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. So, does he just say things to her so she wont freak out, or is he really lying to me. His birth date is Feb. 28/1955 and mine is September 14, 1971 at 5 AM.

Virgo

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Dear Virgo

The comparison with your Pisces man is good but it does show signs of emotional deception. He probably isn't being completely honest with either one of you. Before I go any further however I have to ask you why the whole marriage thing is so important to you. Why would you want to take on his name having your name differ from your children's not to mention the complications changing it back should your relationship not work. Keep in mind that legally you are considered married after cohabitating as long as you have. If I were you I would settle for being included in his will so that you are taken care of in the future. Especially if you have both contributed to your home, household, investments etc.

As mentioned your comparison is good but there is an element that indicates that it could end abruptly so you may want to consider the legal aspects that count regarding property etc instead of whether or not you have the same last name.

His chart shows evidence of sorrow when it comes to relationships and that he can swivel rapidly when it comes to his affections. To force this man to marry would probably be the beginning of the end so if I were you I wouldn't go there.

I don't believe his kids at this stage of the game have the right to dictate what he does with his life and that he is only using how they feel as tool to back out of the marriage.

If you truly love this man, and it appears you do, I would be more inclined to leave well enough alone and enjoy your time together. I believe if you push too hard he will have a change of heart. You know the old saying if something works why fix it.

Eugenia

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