
We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia
I am a Virgo born on Sept.16, 1970. I been married to a cancer born on July 9,1970. We've been married 3 1/2 years. We were dating for 8 years. Our marriage was going great. But then, I had an affair with a co-worker. I told my husband the truth. He said that he would forgive me and would not leave me. The co-worker is a Virgo like me born on September 14, 1955. He was very good to me. I was feeling lonely and he was also. My husband is military. So, sometimes he is gone. The problem is that my husband says he wants us to work things out, but in the process he gets upset for remembering my affair and starts insulting me a lot. He has never hit me, but once he did because he wanted to know who the guy was. I told him not to hit me and he didn't. He doesn't hurt me physically, but emotionally he does. So, now I am confused. The other guy is married, but his wife filed for divorce. He wants me to also get a divorce and go with him. I just don't know what to do. I am confused! What do you think I should do?
Confused
Dear Confused
I'm not surprised that you are confused. My dear girl, what were you thinking. You have such a good comparison with your husband except for the fact that deception and sorrow due to secret affairs could very well ruin this connection. Your husband is a proud man and it will be difficult for him to forgive you completely. The fact that he has his natal Mercury in the sign Cancer indicates that he will never be able to forget what you have done to him and to your marriage. As for your lover, well you didn't really match up very well. Emotional deception and disillusionment are evident. You have to make some quick decisions in order to get your life back on course. If you think you can salvage your marriage by all means do so, get counseling or whatever it takes. If you decide that it's too late and you must move on do so but not by moving from one hot bed to another. You need to give yourself time to discover who you are and what you really want. I do not believe that you really want your secret lover. I feel that you were attracted to him due to a void you were feeling. Your husband might not have been spending enough time with you or perhaps neither one of you worked hard enough to make your marriage work. A good marriage doesn't just happen. It takes plenty of patience, understanding and hard work on the part of both parties. Divorce does look like the direction you are heading. Whether you stay or leave you will be experiencing emotional difficulties due to the poor choices that you have made in the past.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I admire the members who receive replies from you. I have sent you numerous letters and got no reply. I cannot solve the problem in my relationship and that has almost driven me crazy.
I like a male friend who frequently called me in the past. When we were in a group of friends, he always talked with me. At that time, I liked someone else so I didn't show affection to him. But recently, I find that I love him and cannot control myself. I know that he has a girl he likes. I didn't care about this in the past, but now I feel jealous when he talks about her. Every time we go out, we go out with a few friends. I feel unhappy if he does not talk to me or if he talks to someone else. I always become angry because of him. He seems not to care whether I am feeling unhappy or angry. He doesn't call me as frequent as before. Is he selfish? Why did he show concern for me in the past? Now I love him but it seems that something has happened to him. Why? If someone tells me that he doesn't have any special feeling to me, I will certainly go to die. I cannot control myself any more. Can I tell him about my feeling?
He was born in November 7, 1984 at 10:38pm, I was born March 19, 1985, at 4 AM.
Oyster
Dear Oyster
The comparison was good but the timing might be poor for both of you right now. Instead you should be focusing on school and your future professional direction this year. You and your friend will both be in a good high cycle where love is concerned beginning this time next year and providing that neither one of you is involved with someone else it may be the perfect time to get together. As for now build on the friendship. Don't be obvious about the way you feel. Even better start to pay more attention to some of the other guys you hang out with. Who knows you may just fall in love with someone else. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, Leo, Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Aquarius and Pisces. Your chart indicates that you will have plenty of opportunities for love and that you will not end up all alone.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia:
I have been married for six years. For most of that time, our sex life has been practically nonexistent, even though we seem to be quite compatible based on our charts. This is my fault, really, as early on I lost my desire to have sex with him; in fact, I am turned off by his touch. I've never told him this because I don't want to hurt him, but, obviously, the "sex" issue has caused some major discord in our marriage. I have tried to rekindle my passion, but I haven't had any success. I know the problem is not physical, as I often have sexual dreams and fantasize about other men (but I've never cheated). If I am unable to get past this, it most surely will lead to divorce. I was born 11/20/71 at 6:50 a.m., my husband was born 5/6/65, (time unknown). Thank you for your advice.
Passionless Wife
Dear Passionless Wife
I don?t really see your comparison as being all that great regarding love. It lacks in areas essential to building a happy and loving relationship. It appears to be more like a brother sister connection that is definitely not built on passion. Your chart indicates that you are coming into a period that brings opportunities for you to meet someone who knocks you off your feet. This could lead to a secret affair if you aren?t out of your current situation. I suggest that if you don?t want this to happen and you truly want to try to rekindle your relationship, that you start communicating with your husband honestly about your feelings and let him know what?s lacking in your marriage. I am a believer that any relationship can work if both people are willing to put in the effort. However, unfortunately I have found that in most cases when it doesn?t work there is a lack of communication and it?s often quite one-sided with regards to who puts what into the marriage. In your case I feel that honesty and straightforwardness will be required. Although this may hurt your husbands feelings initially, if you are living in a loveless marriage I think he would agree that getting help or splitting up would be preferable to the nonexistent connection that you have right now.
Eugenia