We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia
I am a Virgo born on Sept.16, 1970. I been married to a cancer born on July 9,1970. We've been married 3 1/2 years. We were dating for 8 years. Our marriage was going great. But then, I had an affair with a co-worker. I told my husband the truth. He said that he would forgive me and would not leave me. The co-worker is a Virgo like me born on September 14, 1955. He was very good to me. I was feeling lonely and he was also. My husband is military. So, sometimes he is gone. The problem is that my husband says he wants us to work things out, but in the process he gets upset for remembering my affair and starts insulting me a lot. He has never hit me, but once he did because he wanted to know who the guy was. I told him not to hit me and he didn't. He doesn't hurt me physically, but emotionally he does. So, now I am confused. The other guy is married, but his wife filed for divorce. He wants me to also get a divorce and go with him. I just don't know what to do. I am confused! What do you think I should do?
Confused
Dear Confused
I'm not surprised that you are confused. My dear girl, what were you thinking. You have such a good comparison with your husband except for the fact that deception and sorrow due to secret affairs could very well ruin this connection. Your husband is a proud man and it will be difficult for him to forgive you completely. The fact that he has his natal Mercury in the sign Cancer indicates that he will never be able to forget what you have done to him and to your marriage. As for your lover, well you didn't really match up very well. Emotional deception and disillusionment are evident. You have to make some quick decisions in order to get your life back on course. If you think you can salvage your marriage by all means do so, get counseling or whatever it takes. If you decide that it's too late and you must move on do so but not by moving from one hot bed to another. You need to give yourself time to discover who you are and what you really want. I do not believe that you really want your secret lover. I feel that you were attracted to him due to a void you were feeling. Your husband might not have been spending enough time with you or perhaps neither one of you worked hard enough to make your marriage work. A good marriage doesn't just happen. It takes plenty of patience, understanding and hard work on the part of both parties. Divorce does look like the direction you are heading. Whether you stay or leave you will be experiencing emotional difficulties due to the poor choices that you have made in the past.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia
I met a very special person (February 4, 1969) 4 years ago after having met her at work. Once we talked, we realized we had a lot in common between us and it was amazing how closely the pattern of each of our lives seemed so much alike from our childhood to the present. We knew from the beginning that we could be very good for each other and therefore, we became very close friends almost instantly as though we had known each other all of our lives. I discovered that I could open up to her, like no other person in my life, and tell some of my most intimate feelings and hidden fears that I had carried inside all of my life as she did with me. Ironically, I have always seemed to have the problem of letting myself get too close to people even though I have many friends, they are not intimate friends. As we became closer throughout the 4 years, I have felt myself becoming very scared of getting too close, being hurt and even left behind, without reason, so I in turn distanced myself from her more and more without an explanation. She became less interested in our friendship and it began to unravel for both of us due to the stress of it all. Since December of last year, we have not spoken at all and it has really been a very devastating experience for me. It has changed me as a person in so many ways. I wish very much that I could rekindle our friendship that I miss dearly, but I don't know what would be the right words to say or if we would be better to put this behind and both move on with our lives apart. I was born December 15, 1958 at 8:30 am. Thank you for guidance.
Sagittarius
Dear Sagittarius
I believe that friendship is the operative word here. The comparison showed nothing more than that. It also revealed that there certainly is some mistrust, disillusionment or possible deception as well. Now that could have to do with the fact that you didn't even give her an explanation when you backed away. I fell that you have two choices and they are to move on and prepare to meet someone else who matches up to you much better physically and mentally or phone her up, be honest about your feelings and ask to resume the friendship. When I say friendship I mean just that. I believe that anything more would lead to trouble. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. If she isn't interested at least you'll know and can move on. You tend to match up to those born under the signs Aries, Cancer, Libra and Aquarius (she is not a very strong Aquarius). It is apparent that you do much better with people who are much older or much younger than yourself. You will be in a high cycle regarding love next year so don't waste too much of your time trying to turn what you have with your Aquarian friend into anything more than a friendship at this point.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I really enjoy your column and find your replies eloquent and very interesting. I've written in before, and haven't gotten a response, so I figured I'd try again. I am in a strange situation right now. I've had an eating disorder for the past 3 years of my life, and just recently, got put into the hospital due to complications from the severity of it. I know what I'm doing is wrong, and I'm trying to change, but it seems like every attempt is half-hearted at best. I've read in several different books that individuals born on my DOB (March 9, 1985, @ 1:45AM) show a pattern of substance abuse and health problems. The year just seems to be getting worse and worse and I was wondering what my chart holds for the upcoming school year. I think I put up a front and have a difficult time letting others get close, in fear that I will somehow lose control of everything in my life. Will my life and relationships with others improve at all? Thank you for your time.
Pisces
Dear Pisces
You aren't a very strong Pisces only having your natal Sun in that sign. Your chart is predominantly Aries with your natal Mercury, Venus and Mars in that sign and Scorpio with your natal Saturn and Pluto in that sign. Your recent jaunt to the hospital does show up and it appears that if you don't use your Scorpio discipline to get back on track that you will end up in hospital again over the course of the next year. I urge you to take your health concerns seriously and stabilize your mental outlook before you start to worry about relationships. You have to learn to love yourself first. Your chart indicates that you have so much to work with but with your natal Neptune adversely aspecting your natal Mercury it is apparent that you are not always honest with yourself and this can lead to problems dealing with denial etc. However with your natal Mercury favorably positioned to your natal Jupiter it should help you to feel better about yourself. Problems with home, family or friends may occur if you don't take better care of yourself. It is obvious that you have people around you who care and who may be getting annoyed with the way you are handling your life. You are bright, creative and could help others with similar problems. You will probably be more attracted to people or partners who are older or younger and possibly at this stage of your life you aren't really meeting a wide enough variety of people. It is important for you to get focused and to keep active as well as to get your eating disorder sorted out once and for all. You are the master of your own destiny and no one else can make the adjustments for you. I believe that you have what it takes to change your life but the most difficult part is taking the first step. If you don't get started your educational pursuits will suffer over the course of the next couple of years, however if you can manage to pull things together you have the potential to do quite well. You should be meeting people over the next year that are good for you as well as those who can help you make the necessary life changes. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, Virgo, Scorpio and Pisces.
Eugenia
