We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia
I am a Virgo born on Sept.16, 1970. I been married to a cancer born on July 9,1970. We've been married 3 1/2 years. We were dating for 8 years. Our marriage was going great. But then, I had an affair with a co-worker. I told my husband the truth. He said that he would forgive me and would not leave me. The co-worker is a Virgo like me born on September 14, 1955. He was very good to me. I was feeling lonely and he was also. My husband is military. So, sometimes he is gone. The problem is that my husband says he wants us to work things out, but in the process he gets upset for remembering my affair and starts insulting me a lot. He has never hit me, but once he did because he wanted to know who the guy was. I told him not to hit me and he didn't. He doesn't hurt me physically, but emotionally he does. So, now I am confused. The other guy is married, but his wife filed for divorce. He wants me to also get a divorce and go with him. I just don't know what to do. I am confused! What do you think I should do?
Confused
Dear Confused
I'm not surprised that you are confused. My dear girl, what were you thinking. You have such a good comparison with your husband except for the fact that deception and sorrow due to secret affairs could very well ruin this connection. Your husband is a proud man and it will be difficult for him to forgive you completely. The fact that he has his natal Mercury in the sign Cancer indicates that he will never be able to forget what you have done to him and to your marriage. As for your lover, well you didn't really match up very well. Emotional deception and disillusionment are evident. You have to make some quick decisions in order to get your life back on course. If you think you can salvage your marriage by all means do so, get counseling or whatever it takes. If you decide that it's too late and you must move on do so but not by moving from one hot bed to another. You need to give yourself time to discover who you are and what you really want. I do not believe that you really want your secret lover. I feel that you were attracted to him due to a void you were feeling. Your husband might not have been spending enough time with you or perhaps neither one of you worked hard enough to make your marriage work. A good marriage doesn't just happen. It takes plenty of patience, understanding and hard work on the part of both parties. Divorce does look like the direction you are heading. Whether you stay or leave you will be experiencing emotional difficulties due to the poor choices that you have made in the past.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I feel so hopeless at this point in my relationship and was looking for some guidance. My husband and I have been married 20 years and together 22 years. Last year he just upped and left the house and said he wanted a divorce. We've had our ups and downs but basically a good relationship and especially a good friendship, or so I thought. After being gone for 9 months he decided he wanted to make a go of it and came back into my life.
Please understand that when he left I was so distraught and even considered suicide. I allowed him back in my life and we agreed we'd take it one day at a time. It's only been two months and he has just informed me that he cannot stand the guilt he's feeling and had to confess that he feels like he came back for all the wrong reasons. I have been to counseling and he has agreed to also go talk to someone. I just can't tell you how sick I feel right now. I can't believe he would give up after only two months knowing we have so much to work through. I love this man with all my heart and know in my heart we can get through this.
I was wondering if there is any way to help me in my sole search for the right path. We've been told several times that we were meant to be together, but I know that doesn't mean it will happen or even be easy.
His birthday is 4/24/58 and mine is 12/6/58. My birth hour is 4:08am but I don't know his. I don't know what to do and cannot emotionally handle another broken heart. Could things work out between us if we put forth the effort and will he put forth the effort needed to get us through this?
AKA Broken Hearted
Dear AKA Broken Hearted
You do have a decent comparison with your husband both mentally and emotionally however physically there do appear to be some problems. Your chart indicates that your relationship will be unstable until mid February however deception and disillusionment will continue to haunt you right through next year. The final outcome will be apparent October/November of next year. You do have to give this relationship a chance but unless both of you do so it isn't likely to work. Your husband's chart denotes that he is totally confused about his personal life and that isn't about to change any time soon. He is likely to experience a change of heart around May/June of next year. The one thing that I don't want you to do is to be a doormat. Opportunities for romance can be yours in May/June so if your husband isn't trying to rekindle his relationship with you at that time don't be afraid to get out and meet someone new. It will also be the time to clear up any legal matters or financial concerns. You have to start looking out for yourself. It would be nice if you could to sort through your differences but if you can't be prepared to do what's best for you. If you don't communicate with one another or you both see different therapists you may never figure out what the real problem is. You have to work together in order to come to a workable agreement.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
A few months ago, I could not get an ex-boy fiend out of my mind. It was his 30th Birthday coming up and I just could not stop thinking about him! I took it upon myself to write a letter to him just to say hello, as we had not spoken in over 5 years since I moved back home to Australia. I didn't know where he was (he lives in the US) so I sent the letter to his parent's address, which they forwarded to him. In the letter I said not to feel obligated to write back if he didn't want to etc. I knew he was married and wanted to respect that. He was the love of my life, the one that I still compare everyone else to. He was such an important influence on who I am.Two days ago, I received an email back from him. He was amazed and very happy to hear from me. He is divorced now, living with a new girlfriend in another state. We have sent a few e-mails back and forth over the past few days and I am stunned that we still know exactly what to say to make the other laugh and connect! We were the best of friends and I was equally as devastated when we split up for losing a lover and best friend.
My point is, have we come back into communication with each other for a reason? I always thought of him as my soul mate and have often said that if we had met in our late 20's, we would have been together for life. I am now 29. I am sure I am reading too much into it. Or am I? If not, it is really nice to be in touch again. What's happening here???
Kindest Regards
Kate
Dear Kate
It is too bad that you didn't include his date of birth. Without it I can't run a comparison in order to determine if you do belong together or not. I can tell you however that you are going through your Saturn return right now and this always makes you reevaluate your past. It can bring past partner back into your life especially if you didn't have proper closure the first time around. I suggest that you tread carefully because you also have transiting Saturn opposite your natal Neptune and this can mean that you or he are not being completely honest about your intentions, situation or feelings. Check out your compatibility with this man on the site before you proceed and if you do match up well I suggest that you move forward with caution. Ask questions and dig deep to find out where he has been and whom he is with. Truth will be the most important issue regarding your romantic future this year. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, Leo, Libra and Sagittarius.
Eugenia
