We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia
I am a Virgo born on Sept.16, 1970. I been married to a cancer born on July 9,1970. We've been married 3 1/2 years. We were dating for 8 years. Our marriage was going great. But then, I had an affair with a co-worker. I told my husband the truth. He said that he would forgive me and would not leave me. The co-worker is a Virgo like me born on September 14, 1955. He was very good to me. I was feeling lonely and he was also. My husband is military. So, sometimes he is gone. The problem is that my husband says he wants us to work things out, but in the process he gets upset for remembering my affair and starts insulting me a lot. He has never hit me, but once he did because he wanted to know who the guy was. I told him not to hit me and he didn't. He doesn't hurt me physically, but emotionally he does. So, now I am confused. The other guy is married, but his wife filed for divorce. He wants me to also get a divorce and go with him. I just don't know what to do. I am confused! What do you think I should do?
Confused
Dear Confused
I'm not surprised that you are confused. My dear girl, what were you thinking. You have such a good comparison with your husband except for the fact that deception and sorrow due to secret affairs could very well ruin this connection. Your husband is a proud man and it will be difficult for him to forgive you completely. The fact that he has his natal Mercury in the sign Cancer indicates that he will never be able to forget what you have done to him and to your marriage. As for your lover, well you didn't really match up very well. Emotional deception and disillusionment are evident. You have to make some quick decisions in order to get your life back on course. If you think you can salvage your marriage by all means do so, get counseling or whatever it takes. If you decide that it's too late and you must move on do so but not by moving from one hot bed to another. You need to give yourself time to discover who you are and what you really want. I do not believe that you really want your secret lover. I feel that you were attracted to him due to a void you were feeling. Your husband might not have been spending enough time with you or perhaps neither one of you worked hard enough to make your marriage work. A good marriage doesn't just happen. It takes plenty of patience, understanding and hard work on the part of both parties. Divorce does look like the direction you are heading. Whether you stay or leave you will be experiencing emotional difficulties due to the poor choices that you have made in the past.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia...
I sent you an email last spring, but I haven't received your reply.
I was born on February 3, 1977 (10:40 pm) and the guy whom I want to talk about was born in August 29, 1974 (2:00 am) In fact, we are not getting along very well recently. I told him that I wanted to break up with him but he didn't let me go. He told me that his goal in life is to live with me and he loves me. But I feel that he is obsessive or greedy. A few days ago, he yelled at me and even beat me. I got bruises all over my body.
I love someone else now. He was born in Feb 11, 1971 (5 am). I like him very much and want to marry him. But my boyfriend doesn't let me go.
I want to marry the second guy next year. Do you think it's okay? Will the first guy disturb my life in the future? Please give me an advice.
Nowhere to Turn
Dear No Where to Turn
You need to back up and take a look at what you are putting up with. I believe that you are leaning toward your Aquarius friend because he doesn't abuse you. He is in fact better for you then your Virgo partner but you need time to be on your own in order to know what your true feelings are. I believe that you should end your current relationship with your Virgo immediately. Move if you have to in order to get away from his abusiveness. This time next year (July/August) you will be in a high cycle regarding love and romance and you should wait until that time before you make a decision to be with your Aquarius partner. You may just meet someone new during that time that will be really good to you and for you. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, Leo, Sagittarius and Aquarius.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
The year 2000 came with fireworks, just not the fireworks I was expecting. After 5 years in a relationship with the same man, two and half of which we were married, he indicated January 2,2000 that he was not sure if he was "in love" with me. This was perhaps not a surprise to me, as we had been having conflicts over the last year due to my attending grad school and we had attended counseling, per my request. After much debating, I decided to leave our house on Jan 8, 2000 and allow him some "time to think." It was during that time that I found out that there was another woman with whom he was involved. I have always been very naive, too naive I suppose! He was my first boyfriend and, therefore, my only experience. Since my discovery, I have endured many unpleasant moments, which I would rather not retell. A month after we were separated, I decided that I could not continue with a relationship which was based on a lie, and so I filed for divorce. And so here I stand, filled with anger and pain. Feeling guilty as perhaps the reason why he ended up involving himself with someone else was my fault or my dedication to my career...I don't know whether that is a question that you may be able to answer, but, for my own peace I would like to know. I was born April 4, 1975, at 8:15 a.m. sun sign: Aries; rising sign: Taurus/ He was born November 3, 1971 (unfortunately, don't know what time).
Thank you...
Standing Alone
Dear Standing Alone
Your comparison indicates that you are well suited to one another in most ways. There is however two things that would cause problems in your relationship. The first being deception and the second being an element of anger that appears to be present regarding position and status in society. He may have felt some insecurity regarding your direction professionally, however that is no excuse for him to be with someone else. Especially while you were still together. He should have talked to you about the way he felt long before the situation got out of hand. I doubt however that it would have made much of a difference in the outcome because I feel strongly that your educational pursuits are very important to you, and so they should be. He is approaching his Saturn return and this is making him re-evaluate his past as well as pushing him to make the changes necessary to move forward in a way that he sees most suitable. Unfortunately even if he does want to make amends I feel that you are best to move forward yourself. You should be continuing your studies and pushing to be the best that you can be. There will be other partners in the future who will treat you properly so don't feel so alone. Focus on your educational pursuits because that is what you should be doing right now and when the time is right the white knight will rock your world. You do match up well to the sign Scorpio so don't rule out getting involved with another one.
Eugenia
