We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia
I am a Virgo born on Sept.16, 1970. I been married to a cancer born on July 9,1970. We've been married 3 1/2 years. We were dating for 8 years. Our marriage was going great. But then, I had an affair with a co-worker. I told my husband the truth. He said that he would forgive me and would not leave me. The co-worker is a Virgo like me born on September 14, 1955. He was very good to me. I was feeling lonely and he was also. My husband is military. So, sometimes he is gone. The problem is that my husband says he wants us to work things out, but in the process he gets upset for remembering my affair and starts insulting me a lot. He has never hit me, but once he did because he wanted to know who the guy was. I told him not to hit me and he didn't. He doesn't hurt me physically, but emotionally he does. So, now I am confused. The other guy is married, but his wife filed for divorce. He wants me to also get a divorce and go with him. I just don't know what to do. I am confused! What do you think I should do?
Confused
Dear Confused
I'm not surprised that you are confused. My dear girl, what were you thinking. You have such a good comparison with your husband except for the fact that deception and sorrow due to secret affairs could very well ruin this connection. Your husband is a proud man and it will be difficult for him to forgive you completely. The fact that he has his natal Mercury in the sign Cancer indicates that he will never be able to forget what you have done to him and to your marriage. As for your lover, well you didn't really match up very well. Emotional deception and disillusionment are evident. You have to make some quick decisions in order to get your life back on course. If you think you can salvage your marriage by all means do so, get counseling or whatever it takes. If you decide that it's too late and you must move on do so but not by moving from one hot bed to another. You need to give yourself time to discover who you are and what you really want. I do not believe that you really want your secret lover. I feel that you were attracted to him due to a void you were feeling. Your husband might not have been spending enough time with you or perhaps neither one of you worked hard enough to make your marriage work. A good marriage doesn't just happen. It takes plenty of patience, understanding and hard work on the part of both parties. Divorce does look like the direction you are heading. Whether you stay or leave you will be experiencing emotional difficulties due to the poor choices that you have made in the past.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
I was born July 24, 1961 at 12:15 PM and I have been having an affair with a married man for 2 years. He's born November 24, 1959 I don't know what time. I'm also unsure of his wife's birth date. I am absolutely madly in love with this man. He has had numerous affairs and was in fact seeing another lady when he and I first started seeing each other. He stopped seeing her and was only seeing me. He tells me he loves me. I know he's gone to his mother and told her he loves me as well as I have spoken to her several times. A few weeks ago someone, unknown to us, called his place of employment, my place of employment AND his wife and told this little bit of gossip. Our jobs are not in jeopardy but the gossip is of course crazy. I told him he would have to choose between his family and me. It's not possible that we could keep seeing each other with someone knowing who we are and where we work and so on. We live in a very small community! So...this person called his wife two times. She did not tell him at all. She only told him when he went home and told her someone was calling his work place starting gossip. She has not confronted him about this; she has actually just pretended it never happened. They are as normal, which of course is not the best. He says he can't leave her because of his children ages 17, 16, and 13. So as it stands now he and I are finished. My heart is broken. I know this man is not the best man in the world but I love him anyway. I want him so bad it hurts. Will he ever leave her for me? Do I have a hope at all? I know his sign is a good sign for a Leo...please help!!
Leo
Dear Leo
What are you thinking?????? I can't believe you think so little of yourself that you would get involved with a man (mommy's boy) who is obviously a two-timing cheater with little respect for woman.
You are right however about one thing and that is that you do match up to this man but you have to realize that he will never be true to anyone, not you, obviously not his wife, or any other partner he gets involved with. If you can live with him cheating on you go ahead and fight for this unworthy man.
He is a Sagittarius and they are born bachelors. He will never fully commit to anyone. To introduce you to his mother is about as low as he can get. Going behind his wife's back and bringing you into his inner circle is not acceptable. Put yourself in his wife's shoes for just a moment and regardless of whether he matches up to you or her better he should have the courage and decency to end one relationship before getting involved in another.
He is coming into a two to three year Saturn transit that is going to force him to make some changes and one of those changes could very easily be his wife being fed up and moving on (cannot be sure without her birth data). Hopefully this will be the case and you will be able to experience first hand what it is like to be in a committed relationship with a man who has other women in his life. It may just cure you of your need to sleep with other women's husbands.
Your chart indicates that you are in a high cycle regarding having the man of your dreams coming back into your life or finding a new lover (which should be your preference) this year. I suspect however that you will wait for him and probably continue to see him when the gossip dies down.
If you really want this man he is easy to get - just pretend you don't want him - it's the chase that turns him on. I expect if you do pursue him that I will be hearing from you again in about a year and a half to two years.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia
I need some serious advice" my husband has serious health problems" and he is also a very bad alcoholic which is getting worse every day" he has been charged with drinking and driving five years ago " but he is starting to do it again " my life is hell with him my question should I start making plans to leave or stay a bit longer? I am Cancer born July 3, 1946, at 2:45 PM; he is Capricorn Jan. 18 1946. Hope you can help me thank you.
Cancer
Dear Cancer
Hey girl it's time to move on - what are you waiting for. The comparison was anything but good and although I could see your reason for being with him initially once the spark was gone so was the relationship. You are both coming into your Saturn return next year and I feel strongly that you must re-evaluate your position and make the necessary changes. I fear he will not make the effort on his own but should you leave he may be forced to. Regardless you cannot stick around in hopes that he will improve - this relationship has been over for a long time. You are in a high cycle right now for meeting someone new and you are wasting this opportunity by staying in the situation you are in. Take a deep breath, get moving and don't look back.
Eugenia
