We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia
I am a Virgo born on Sept.16, 1970. I been married to a cancer born on July 9,1970. We've been married 3 1/2 years. We were dating for 8 years. Our marriage was going great. But then, I had an affair with a co-worker. I told my husband the truth. He said that he would forgive me and would not leave me. The co-worker is a Virgo like me born on September 14, 1955. He was very good to me. I was feeling lonely and he was also. My husband is military. So, sometimes he is gone. The problem is that my husband says he wants us to work things out, but in the process he gets upset for remembering my affair and starts insulting me a lot. He has never hit me, but once he did because he wanted to know who the guy was. I told him not to hit me and he didn't. He doesn't hurt me physically, but emotionally he does. So, now I am confused. The other guy is married, but his wife filed for divorce. He wants me to also get a divorce and go with him. I just don't know what to do. I am confused! What do you think I should do?
Confused
Dear Confused
I'm not surprised that you are confused. My dear girl, what were you thinking. You have such a good comparison with your husband except for the fact that deception and sorrow due to secret affairs could very well ruin this connection. Your husband is a proud man and it will be difficult for him to forgive you completely. The fact that he has his natal Mercury in the sign Cancer indicates that he will never be able to forget what you have done to him and to your marriage. As for your lover, well you didn't really match up very well. Emotional deception and disillusionment are evident. You have to make some quick decisions in order to get your life back on course. If you think you can salvage your marriage by all means do so, get counseling or whatever it takes. If you decide that it's too late and you must move on do so but not by moving from one hot bed to another. You need to give yourself time to discover who you are and what you really want. I do not believe that you really want your secret lover. I feel that you were attracted to him due to a void you were feeling. Your husband might not have been spending enough time with you or perhaps neither one of you worked hard enough to make your marriage work. A good marriage doesn't just happen. It takes plenty of patience, understanding and hard work on the part of both parties. Divorce does look like the direction you are heading. Whether you stay or leave you will be experiencing emotional difficulties due to the poor choices that you have made in the past.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I realize you are swamped with letters, however I am going through a divorce after 291/2-years. I was born 3-31-48 at 11:27pm in Chicago, IL. My husband was born 8-28-50 at 11:13am in Gary, Indiana. Everyone thought we were the perfect couple! We have one daughter age 27 that dearly loves us both. My husband had an affair with his 25-year old secretary. I found out in Feb. of this year and he did not give her up after all my attempts to make the marriage work. I finally realized I am better off without him. But, God it hurts and I am scared to death. We came to a divorce agreement on Friday and the papers are being drawn up for us to sign. How do I get my self-confidence back after being knocked down for so many years? Last week I saw my first loves identical twin brother and we definitely have a connection (I think) he was born 3-1-41.
I am looking for advice on how to go on with my life and not hurt so much. I loved my husband so much but didn't like what he turned into. Please help me-I am hurting so bad.
Aries
Dear Aries
You have a pretty good chart. Some high cycles are approaching in different areas of life. Romance and relationships look promising between October and February and it will be important that you get out and join in the fun in order to hook up with someone who can take your mind off your cheating husband. You do match up quite nicely to your first loves brother and I wouldn't hesitate to follow through with your connection to him. You also match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Cancer, Virgo, Capricorn and Pisces. Regarding your comparison with your ex, surprisingly enough it was just adequate. I must stress that it is important that you take care of any legal matters. Make sure that you get your share of whatever the two of you accumulated over the years. It's one thing to be hurt and another to be hurt and financially in the poorhouse. Once you know that your financial situation is okay you will feel much better about yourself and your future. You should be considering what you want to do with the rest of your life. The area of your chart that deals with work and money is moving into favorable times and you should consider all the things that you used to dream about doing. Your chart indicates that you do have ability in areas that deal with communications, travel, hospitality industry and sales. Don't be afraid to try new things. You will find out how capable you are very quickly if you take control and make the effort.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I have dated. I have been engaged a few times but never married (I think I always took marriage too seriously -- and never could promise to do all that marriage entails). I had a loving relationship with a man who had a terminal illness, who died in '95. I have always kept the door open in my heart that I might find a life-long partner, but now I wonder: should I shut the door on this option? I'm not afraid of being alone. I am afraid of nurturing false hope in myself. I was born January 6, 1953, at 5:45 am.
Thank you.
Capricorn
Hi Capricorn
You should never close the door on love, romance, marriage, partnership etc. One of the reasons why you have gone the route but never crossed the line when it came to marriage is due to having your natal Uranus in an area of your chart that deals with relationships opposite your Sun in an area of your chart that deals with your personal outlook. This has probably caused you or your partners throughout life to back away or have a change of heart at the last minute. With transiting Saturn moving into that area of your chart there has never been a better time to find love and get serious then now. Also with your Moon in the sign Virgo it isn't unusual for you to find love or get into a serious relationship during the second half of life. In your case you are moving into a high cycle regarding love right now and you should be out meeting new people. This particular transit can also bring someone from your past back into your life so perhaps if there is someone you still think about you should readdress this relationship. In the past the timing was probably wrong with this person. This is a great year for you creatively, educationally and where growth is concerned. You should be expanding your circle of friends, getting involved in discussions or courses that will alter your philosophy, attitude, lifestyle and outlook. You are going through changes and that is part of the reason you are feeling somewhat concerned or restless about finding love or backing away from it completely. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, early Cancer, Virgo, Sagittarius, Capricorn and Pisces.
Eugenia
