We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
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The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I am a 49-year-old woman who has sworn off men for the past six years; mostly to avoid a weakness I had four bad relationships with big blue-eyed country boys. Four months ago one walked into my house for a volunteer project and I'm losing it because this one also happens to be SMART. Problem is, he's a whole bunch younger and apparently pretty naive about women and sex in general. The compatibility thermometer gave us a 99%, and I'm pretty sure he's attracted to me--he's here all the time and we can talk away the night. But now I want to move it up to the next level, and I don't know how or when, or whether it's a good idea to ruin an almost perfect friendship.I'm born 3/3/52, 2:45 am, and he's born 5/31/65, 2:30 a.m. any advice on timing, or whether this is a good idea?
Perplexed
Dear Perplexed
You do have an amazing comparison with your Gemini friend. I would however take it nice and slow and let him make the moves. I don't have a problem with the age difference however at some point it may cause a problem with friends, family as well as with one another. I am basing this on your charts, not on your chronological age difference. It will depend on his maturity however I do believe that he has a strong sense of who he is and what he wants out of life. The only other question that might arise will be regarding children. That could be with children that either one of you already have or the fact that he may want a child and you may not be able to reciprocate. As for now however I believe that you should let things unfold naturally and try not to get too caught up in long term for now.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I am really lost in my life and I don't know what to do. I was born on 03/21/1967 at 1:00am. Two years ago I left my country to live in Mexico together with my daughter (06/16/1989-7:26pm). We lived there for almost one year and we were happy. After some time I met a men who lives in US and we got married. Now we are living in US but the situation is very difficult for me and my daughter. Because my husband (01/31/1959-2:50 am) is only permanent resident here, we have to wait for the immigration process between 5 and 7 years. Meanwhile my daughter and I cannot have a legal status and it was impossible to find other ways to be legal. This means that I cannot work legally, I am 100% dependent of my husband, I feel very lonely and depressed. We don't have family around, we don't have friends. My husband is a very difficult man, grumpy, without any sense of humor, the macho style, stingy, he wants somebody to take care of him, to cook for him, to respect him, he needs a woman that can replace his mother. I caught him right after the wedding, last year, by mistake, that he receives a lot of emails from a lot of women, very loving emails...you know...I was very hurt and upset for a long time. He lived alone for many years and he told me that he was looking for a relationship and even after he said to everybody that he is married and happy now, these women are still writing to him and he doesn't know what to do with them. Can you believe that? Because I didn't...his behavior with my daughter is very bad. He is very rude with her. She is a very nice teenager, brilliant at school, very smart. Everybody loves her except him. She is doing all the time a big effort to please him, but nothing seems to be right for him. He recognizes that she is very intelligent but always he says that she is not doing enough and he puts a lot of pressure on her. I tried hundreds of times to explain to him that his behavior is wrong, but he still thinks he is perfect and his skills like a parent are perfect. In my opinion he doesn't have any skills and he doesn't want to learn anyway.
He was very sick in the last months, he had open heart surgery, and I helped him a lot in his recovery...he was not able to do anything by himself...Even if he recognizes that me and my daughter were very close to him during all this hard time that he had, his behavior doesn't change...is the same grumpy, rude and without manners person.
My daughter and I?are thinking to leave him, but the problem is that we don't have anywhere to go. We cannot return to Mexico, because we don't have anything there anymore, and is the same situation for my country too.
I would not like to divorce (it will be the third one in my life), I really want to work out this relationship, I really want to help him learn how to be a nice person, I really want to have a nice family...He tells me that he loves me, but it seems to be so difficult for him to show that...
What do you see in my horoscope regarding this situation? Do you think that I will be able to find the way to fix all this problems? I don't want to see my daughter unhappy...I don't want to be unhappy too... what do you think about that?
Thank you very much,?
gabituca
Dear gabituca
The astrological comparison that you have with your husband really is quite good. There is some sorrow in an area that deals with children. I believe that his problem is that he was used to living alone and although he craved having a woman in his life a ready made family was not really what he wanted. He fell in love with you and your daughter was something he had to tolerate. It isn?t that he has a bad comparison with her ? in fact it is actually quite favorable however the problem is he can?t wrap his head around the idea of having to deal with the normal life changes that having a teenager around the house brings with it. For you i
Dear Eugenia,
I am in a long distance relationship with a man 5 hours from me (Oct. 24, 1979) and I am wondering how we can make it work or if it really could work since I don't have the time (nor money) to waste on unworthy causes.
I feel very strongly about him. We've met twice & the first time we were both out of sorts. Last time we had a great time! I've never had an online relationship but I do understand that a lot of work is involved. Commitment, sacrifices & compromising are the top 3 things I can think of. I'm afraid that I won't be able to provide my part of the bargain as well as he could. I'm afraid that after some time we'll be too tired to continue this relationship & feel that we have -really- wasted our time & money. I haven't been able to find someone as compatible with me as he in my own town. I've been single for over a year now. I'm afraid I might only be interested in him because he's interested in me too, just because I've been single for so long (I don't think that's very truthful though).
The only way that an online relationship can work is if both partners plan on being together down the line. We're not dating yet but we both want to move back to BC in the near future. I have so many fears. What about my education? My career? What if we're only compatible with distance between us, & then we rip each other to shreds once we're together-together? ARGH!!
Could you offer me a bit of astrological advice? I do know that all but 2 of his & my astro houses are located under the same sign. Any words of wisdom would be really appreciated!
Wrapped up
Dear Wrapped up
The comparison was okay. Keep in mind that in order to have a relationship work it takes work. People always think that if they fall in love that's all it takes but unfortunately a relationship probably takes more time, effort and work then anything else you do in life. I believe that he is someone who can help you achieve some of your dreams, hopes and wishes, however that doesn't mean that you will end up together forever. More so than having a long term or everlasting union a relationship should be based on how much you learn from one another, enjoy one another and compliment one another. You have time to kill right now as the next time you are in a really high cycle for love is next year. As for now you should be enjoying whatever time you do get to spend with one another. Just because you live a distance doesn't mean that you can't do things on the cheap. You'd probably spend just as much cash staying at home as you would staying at his place or vise versa. If you really enjoy one another's company you'll find ways to spend more time together while you discover each other's likes, dislikes, needs and desires. Don't be impatient love and relationships take time.
Eugenia
