We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I am a 49-year-old woman who has sworn off men for the past six years; mostly to avoid a weakness I had four bad relationships with big blue-eyed country boys. Four months ago one walked into my house for a volunteer project and I'm losing it because this one also happens to be SMART. Problem is, he's a whole bunch younger and apparently pretty naive about women and sex in general. The compatibility thermometer gave us a 99%, and I'm pretty sure he's attracted to me--he's here all the time and we can talk away the night. But now I want to move it up to the next level, and I don't know how or when, or whether it's a good idea to ruin an almost perfect friendship.I'm born 3/3/52, 2:45 am, and he's born 5/31/65, 2:30 a.m. any advice on timing, or whether this is a good idea?
Perplexed
Dear Perplexed
You do have an amazing comparison with your Gemini friend. I would however take it nice and slow and let him make the moves. I don't have a problem with the age difference however at some point it may cause a problem with friends, family as well as with one another. I am basing this on your charts, not on your chronological age difference. It will depend on his maturity however I do believe that he has a strong sense of who he is and what he wants out of life. The only other question that might arise will be regarding children. That could be with children that either one of you already have or the fact that he may want a child and you may not be able to reciprocate. As for now however I believe that you should let things unfold naturally and try not to get too caught up in long term for now.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I know I've met my soul mate, but we keep having conflicts that end with me not wanting to deal with him. He's a Taurus born May 4, 1971 and I'm a Cancer born June 25, 1962. Nine months ago he came back into my life after a 5-year separation, and I believed he wanted a second chance and that he truly loved me. His actions say otherwise when it comes to my feelings. I've gone out of my way, once again, to make sure he is happy, comfortable, and to give all the support he needs. He's done nothing for me and he makes me feel that he has taken advantage of me again and only cares about himself.
I've just recently asked him to leave, because he had hurt my feelings again and that was the last straw for me. I miss him desperately, but I don't know if it's my self-destructive behavior that won't completely let go! I don't want to go through this back and forth emotional roller coaster with him forever. Am I lying to myself? My Cancer logic is slipping away...
Destined
Dear Destined
The comparison does lack some qualities that I would like to see and deception and disillusionment are present in areas of your chart that deal with the home and chores that you share with one another. The unfortunate thing is that once you do too much for someone it is hard to back off and stop doing without causing problems in the relationship. This person is taking advantage of you but you have allowed it to happen. Your chart indicates that you do have problems when it comes to relationships. Your natal Saturn opposite your natal Venus both adversely aspected by your natal Neptune can make it difficult for you to choose properly. It is important for you to have an astrological comparison done before you give your heart to someone. You are in a high cycle for romance right now and will also be during the first half of next year. It is important for you to move on and free yourself of this man who has little to offer you but grief. Keep in mind that as long as he is in your life it will be difficult to take advantage of the opportunities you have for meeting someone new. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, Libra, Sagittarius and Aquarius.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
I am a Virgo born on Sept.16, 1970. I been married to a cancer born on July 9,1970. We've been married 3 1/2 years. We were dating for 8 years. Our marriage was going great. But then, I had an affair with a co-worker. I told my husband the truth. He said that he would forgive me and would not leave me. The co-worker is a Virgo like me born on September 14, 1955. He was very good to me. I was feeling lonely and he was also. My husband is military. So, sometimes he is gone. The problem is that my husband says he wants us to work things out, but in the process he gets upset for remembering my affair and starts insulting me a lot. He has never hit me, but once he did because he wanted to know who the guy was. I told him not to hit me and he didn't. He doesn't hurt me physically, but emotionally he does. So, now I am confused. The other guy is married, but his wife filed for divorce. He wants me to also get a divorce and go with him. I just don't know what to do. I am confused! What do you think I should do?
Confused
Dear Confused
I'm not surprised that you are confused. My dear girl, what were you thinking. You have such a good comparison with your husband except for the fact that deception and sorrow due to secret affairs could very well ruin this connection. Your husband is a proud man and it will be difficult for him to forgive you completely. The fact that he has his natal Mercury in the sign Cancer indicates that he will never be able to forget what you have done to him and to your marriage. As for your lover, well you didn't really match up very well. Emotional deception and disillusionment are evident. You have to make some quick decisions in order to get your life back on course. If you think you can salvage your marriage by all means do so, get counseling or whatever it takes. If you decide that it's too late and you must move on do so but not by moving from one hot bed to another. You need to give yourself time to discover who you are and what you really want. I do not believe that you really want your secret lover. I feel that you were attracted to him due to a void you were feeling. Your husband might not have been spending enough time with you or perhaps neither one of you worked hard enough to make your marriage work. A good marriage doesn't just happen. It takes plenty of patience, understanding and hard work on the part of both parties. Divorce does look like the direction you are heading. Whether you stay or leave you will be experiencing emotional difficulties due to the poor choices that you have made in the past.
Eugenia
