We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
The year 2000 came with fireworks, just not the fireworks I was expecting. After 5 years in a relationship with the same man, two and half of which we were married, he indicated January 2,2000 that he was not sure if he was "in love" with me. This was perhaps not a surprise to me, as we had been having conflicts over the last year due to my attending grad school and we had attended counseling, per my request. After much debating, I decided to leave our house on Jan 8, 2000 and allow him some "time to think." It was during that time that I found out that there was another woman with whom he was involved. I have always been very naive, too naive I suppose! He was my first boyfriend and, therefore, my only experience. Since my discovery, I have endured many unpleasant moments, which I would rather not retell. A month after we were separated, I decided that I could not continue with a relationship which was based on a lie, and so I filed for divorce. And so here I stand, filled with anger and pain. Feeling guilty as perhaps the reason why he ended up involving himself with someone else was my fault or my dedication to my career...I don't know whether that is a question that you may be able to answer, but, for my own peace I would like to know. I was born April 4, 1975, at 8:15 a.m. sun sign: Aries; rising sign: Taurus/ He was born November 3, 1971 (unfortunately, don't know what time).
Thank you...
Standing Alone
Dear Standing Alone
Your comparison indicates that you are well suited to one another in most ways. There is however two things that would cause problems in your relationship. The first being deception and the second being an element of anger that appears to be present regarding position and status in society. He may have felt some insecurity regarding your direction professionally, however that is no excuse for him to be with someone else. Especially while you were still together. He should have talked to you about the way he felt long before the situation got out of hand. I doubt however that it would have made much of a difference in the outcome because I feel strongly that your educational pursuits are very important to you, and so they should be. He is approaching his Saturn return and this is making him re-evaluate his past as well as pushing him to make the changes necessary to move forward in a way that he sees most suitable. Unfortunately even if he does want to make amends I feel that you are best to move forward yourself. You should be continuing your studies and pushing to be the best that you can be. There will be other partners in the future who will treat you properly so don't feel so alone. Focus on your educational pursuits because that is what you should be doing right now and when the time is right the white knight will rock your world. You do match up well to the sign Scorpio so don't rule out getting involved with another one.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia
I'm considering divorce... my problem is my husband (Sept. 19, 1959.) still considers visiting a single woman, secretly, I always find out, and it hurts me, but he doesn't seem to care, cause as he puts in he isn't doing anything wrong. Well I feel betrayed. I also feel he has other secrets that he doesn't share with me. I could be wrong but I don't really know. My birthday is Feb. 15,1960. Hers is Feb. 26 1960. I kind of do believe they are friends but it still doesn't sit well with me nor do our children like it... Do you think that a divorce is the right thing for me to initiate at this time.. I seem to be running out of options.. Cause deep down I don't want a divorce I want my husband to appreciate & love me.
Thanks for listening............
Feeling left out
Hi Feeling left out
This is a very sticky situation. He matches up to you a little bit better than he does to his Pisces friend. His comparison with her does show some sorrow and on the other side his comparison with you does not indicate deception. I do believe that he is attracted to her and enjoys her company as a friend but I don't believe that he has taken it further. I feel however that she might try. With that in mind it does put you in a very difficult situation. If you nag him you will only make him move towards her. You may want to suggest however that anyone that is a friend of his should also be a friend to the family and have him invite her over for lunch or dinner. This way you get yourself and the children into the loop. At least from that position you can monitor the situation and protect your interests wisely. If he isn't interested in doing so you may want to play his game and find a male friend to spend some time with. After all what's good for the goose is good for the gander. Be smart about the situation. I believe you love him and that your family means enough to you to try to hold it together. If he truly believes in friendship with the opposite sex he should not have a problem with you having male companionship as well. I must caution you however that this can turn into a very dangerous situation especially if you happen to actually meet someone who fills the needs that your husband is obviously not fulfilling. The other approach will be for your children to voice their concerns and how they feel about being left out and that he should be spending the time he gives to his Pisces friend with them.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia
My husband has a drinking problem. He has been able to control this problem for the past 5-6 years. Recently he has begun drinking again and there is starting to be the same kind of mental abuse as he displayed in the past. I am at the age where I do not feel I can repeat and repeat this sort of abuse and lifestyle. Money is also becoming an issue as he continues to drink. He continues to threaten to leave and I am at the point where if not for my financial position, I would put the entire relationship behind me and move on alone. Is this a good idea?.......Please help, he is born July 10, 1951 at 6:30 a.m. and I April 25, 1944, at 10 a.m.
Stay or Leave
Dear Stay or Leave
I believe that your husband will become worse before he becomes better. The next year and a half will be filled with all sorts of limitations for him regarding health, authority figures, dealing with institutions and so forth. I feel that the past couple of years you have taken the brunt of his obvious lack of control and abuse and now is the time to give him an ultimatum. Should he leave he will go down hill over the course of the next couple of years. Should he seek help it will take him the next couple of years to reform. As for you I feel that the time for change is fast approaching. That you should be seeking help from women's groups and co-dependent organizations in order to get back on your feet and away from him. Your comparison did indicate that there has been love in the past with this man but that was probably a long time ago. There is also sorrow especially where substance abuse is concerned and because of this I feel that even if he does seek help that there will always be the potential for him to slip over and over again. I do not believe that you will ever be able to fully put his abuse behind you and that your reason for staying with this man has more to do with fear of being alone and lack of funds. Your chart indicates that you are youthful and entertaining and that you will be okay if you can only get yourself out of this situation. By all means - if he wants to leave let him go.
Eugenia
