We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia
My parents divorced before I went to primary school and then I lived with my father. Since I was small, I was bullied. My mother worked in another city and did not care about me. My father treated me this way because he was remarried and had other children. My mother told me that my grandmother did not treat her well when she was small. This was why she did not know how to show her love to me. I was brought up under this environment and became very lonely. I was afraid to have contact with people. I had a few boyfriends and none of them worked out. I wanted so much my own family but every time I got hurt. With no parents to love, other people looked down on me. When I was at work, it did not turn out okay and I was always faced with many problems. I did not know how to deal with people and felt lost. After so many failures, I've lost my confidence totally. Now I have this boyfriend for over a year. He is a good person but he has a very stubborn character and that I can hardly accept. He always says something to hurt me. He needs someone to take care of him while I also long for someone who can look after me. I doubt if we can be a happy couple but I trust his integrity and like his family who treat me well. Now I just lost my job and had a fight with him.
My mother came back to Shanghai and bought an apartment. Now I am living with her but my mother does not care what I am doing. If you didn't know, you would think I am so lucky with a good apartment and a nice looking face. But in fact I have nothing, no family and no career. My life doesn't have any meaning. Is my life supposed to be this way? Did I do something wrong in my last life?
I was born on October 21, 1972 at around 3:30 am. My boyfriend was born on July 8, 1973 at 5 o'clock (I am not sure how accurate this is).
Hope you can give me some guidance. Thank you.
LOST
Dear LOST
Don't be so hard on yourself and your family. Your chart does show some problems with family however you must realize that the grass always appears to be greener on the other side of the fence. In other words this is an obstacle that you can and will overcome. You can learn from the experience you have had. Although you aren't positive what it would be like to have a loving family it isn't hard to know what you consider a loving family to be. Your boyfriend does match up quite nicely to your chart however there is potential for arguing. I do believe that when you love someone and you truly care about him that you will inevitably have disagreements. There is no apparent deception in your comparison only the fact that you will both overreact at times and this has probably resulted in your breakup. Please call him and try to work out your differences. You said that his family is kind and good to you, therefore you have a base to learn from. If you follow what has worked for them it will work for you as well.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia
I've written to you several times but as yet have not had an answer, so I'm sure that you must be extremely busy. Your advice is so thorough that I hope you will answer my letter. I have been seeing a Gemini male, born June 13, 1950, 4:30 p.m. We've been intimate but it has been more as a friendship than anything else. We don't live together but we live nearby one another. I've known him for approximately one and a half years. He comes on hot and cold (depending on his stresses of the day). He works in an extremely high stress job. If he's had a couple of beers he confesses that he likes me and that he can't believe that I would care for someone like him. He insists he wants to remain friends, yet when I tell him that I can't be friends and try to let go, he talks me into hanging around. I love this man deeply and have been trying to help him. Deep down I feel that he cares more than as a friend for me and doesn't want me out of his life. If the job has stressed him that particular day he does not want to talk and if he does, he has a tendency of cutting you off, so that all you want to do is get off the phone with him. Am I wasting my time? Should I continue to be friends with him? He continually tells me that I deserve better because he's not very stable emotionally, then when I stay away and then see him again, he's major happy to see me. Please tell me if it's worth my while to continue being friends with him or should I just leave him alone and hope he gets better without me. I'm having a hard time letting go but I need to know if I'm wasting my time. I was born January 7, 1947 at 5:15 PM.
Sabrina
Hi Sabrina
You have to be friends before you become lovers. Friends are there forever but lovers come and go. Wake up and realize that if you enjoy being with this man it really doesn't matter and get over his Gemini aloofness and enjoy the moment. I do believe that he loves you. You match up very well emotionally, physically and mentally - what more do you want. On the down side he falls in an area of your chart that deals with secret affairs so if he isn't including you in the rest of his life you may have a serious problem to deal with and you fall in an area of his chart that deals with communication and dealing with his friends and family so if there is a problem regarding these matters you may want to consider clearing them up before moving forward. Your chart indicates that you will be in a high cycle regarding commitment and getting serious beginning mid summer however that doesn't guarantee that it will be with him. With transiting Saturn beginning to move across the top of his chart this year you may find him more receptive to settling down as well as less stressed because he will finally be getting the recognition he needs to feel good about his work. If you don't find him leaning toward becoming more serious between now and the fall of next year you may want to set your sights on someone new. That being the case you may want to consider someone born under the sign Taurus, Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn or Pisces.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
First off I want to state that I really enjoy this web site. It's full of information, and best of all it's FREE!!! So, Thanks.Secondly, In the past year I (July 21, 1979, at 4:5; 7 PM) have had a few boyfriends (I use this word lightly) all of whom I have pushed away due to an ever persistent, lingering, thought of my ex (April 5, 1979). We have been apart over a year and even though he has moved on I can't seem to, my heart won't let me. So I continually push away every other guy that comes my way, because really, how fair is it to be with them in mind but not in heart. Things are not made any easier by this recurring dream I have that he is coming back. Though I do realize that I am not the same person I was when I knew him and in turn I am sure he is not the same person that I knew either, I can't seem to forget him. I've tried, but everything seems to remind me of him and "our time". I even went to a professional Tarot card reader and before I could even get comfortable she was telling me what he looked like (even his height), how he acted, and about our relationship together.I went to see her right after our breakup to get a grasp on what was ahead of me, but all she could talk about was how he would be coming back and that things would be better this time. Well, It's been over a year since that reading and he is nowhere in sight, but what I want to know is how do I move on? Sometimes I think I'm ready, then I'll run into him somewhere and pretend not to see him, because the thought of us having idle, meaningless conversation just kills me. Plus, at the sight of him my heart skips a beat, I can feel my face get flushed and my stomach flies away, not to mention my tongue ties in knots. After a year of being apart he still makes me feel like I did the first time I kissed him.Basically, I just want to know what to do. I can't keep pushing away every guy that comes my direction (soon I'll run out of guys). I would appreciate any thoughts or guidance you can offer.
Thinking of Him
Dear Thinking of Him
The comparison with your Aries lover was really quite good. I believe that there is a future with him if you can only get past being afraid to talk to him. Although the timing isn't quite right I do believe that toward the last half of 2001 and the first half of 2002 you may find yourself in a relationship with him once again. For now you should try to form a friendship. Talk to him, enjoy his company when you do see him and see where it leads. You should also continue to try to meet other partners because your Aries friend isn't the only one who will match up well to you. Your chart indicates that you will be in a high cycle for love over the next few years and it is important to get out enjoy yourself. You match up well to those born under the signs Taurus, Gemini, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces. By the way your Aries only had the Sun in Aries. His natal chart consists primarily of water signs, Pisces being the most influential with a touch of Cancer and Scorpio.
Eugenia
