We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia
My parents divorced before I went to primary school and then I lived with my father. Since I was small, I was bullied. My mother worked in another city and did not care about me. My father treated me this way because he was remarried and had other children. My mother told me that my grandmother did not treat her well when she was small. This was why she did not know how to show her love to me. I was brought up under this environment and became very lonely. I was afraid to have contact with people. I had a few boyfriends and none of them worked out. I wanted so much my own family but every time I got hurt. With no parents to love, other people looked down on me. When I was at work, it did not turn out okay and I was always faced with many problems. I did not know how to deal with people and felt lost. After so many failures, I've lost my confidence totally. Now I have this boyfriend for over a year. He is a good person but he has a very stubborn character and that I can hardly accept. He always says something to hurt me. He needs someone to take care of him while I also long for someone who can look after me. I doubt if we can be a happy couple but I trust his integrity and like his family who treat me well. Now I just lost my job and had a fight with him.
My mother came back to Shanghai and bought an apartment. Now I am living with her but my mother does not care what I am doing. If you didn't know, you would think I am so lucky with a good apartment and a nice looking face. But in fact I have nothing, no family and no career. My life doesn't have any meaning. Is my life supposed to be this way? Did I do something wrong in my last life?
I was born on October 21, 1972 at around 3:30 am. My boyfriend was born on July 8, 1973 at 5 o'clock (I am not sure how accurate this is).
Hope you can give me some guidance. Thank you.
LOST
Dear LOST
Don't be so hard on yourself and your family. Your chart does show some problems with family however you must realize that the grass always appears to be greener on the other side of the fence. In other words this is an obstacle that you can and will overcome. You can learn from the experience you have had. Although you aren't positive what it would be like to have a loving family it isn't hard to know what you consider a loving family to be. Your boyfriend does match up quite nicely to your chart however there is potential for arguing. I do believe that when you love someone and you truly care about him that you will inevitably have disagreements. There is no apparent deception in your comparison only the fact that you will both overreact at times and this has probably resulted in your breakup. Please call him and try to work out your differences. You said that his family is kind and good to you, therefore you have a base to learn from. If you follow what has worked for them it will work for you as well.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I am really lost in my life and I don't know what to do. I was born on 03/21/1967 at 1:00am. Two years ago I left my country to live in Mexico together with my daughter (06/16/1989-7:26pm). We lived there for almost one year and we were happy. After some time I met a men who lives in US and we got married. Now we are living in US but the situation is very difficult for me and my daughter. Because my husband (01/31/1959-2:50 am) is only permanent resident here, we have to wait for the immigration process between 5 and 7 years. Meanwhile my daughter and I cannot have a legal status and it was impossible to find other ways to be legal. This means that I cannot work legally, I am 100% dependent of my husband, I feel very lonely and depressed. We don't have family around, we don't have friends. My husband is a very difficult man, grumpy, without any sense of humor, the macho style, stingy, he wants somebody to take care of him, to cook for him, to respect him, he needs a woman that can replace his mother. I caught him right after the wedding, last year, by mistake, that he receives a lot of emails from a lot of women, very loving emails...you know...I was very hurt and upset for a long time. He lived alone for many years and he told me that he was looking for a relationship and even after he said to everybody that he is married and happy now, these women are still writing to him and he doesn't know what to do with them. Can you believe that? Because I didn't...his behavior with my daughter is very bad. He is very rude with her. She is a very nice teenager, brilliant at school, very smart. Everybody loves her except him. She is doing all the time a big effort to please him, but nothing seems to be right for him. He recognizes that she is very intelligent but always he says that she is not doing enough and he puts a lot of pressure on her. I tried hundreds of times to explain to him that his behavior is wrong, but he still thinks he is perfect and his skills like a parent are perfect. In my opinion he doesn't have any skills and he doesn't want to learn anyway.
He was very sick in the last months, he had open heart surgery, and I helped him a lot in his recovery...he was not able to do anything by himself...Even if he recognizes that me and my daughter were very close to him during all this hard time that he had, his behavior doesn't change...is the same grumpy, rude and without manners person.
My daughter and I?are thinking to leave him, but the problem is that we don't have anywhere to go. We cannot return to Mexico, because we don't have anything there anymore, and is the same situation for my country too.
I would not like to divorce (it will be the third one in my life), I really want to work out this relationship, I really want to help him learn how to be a nice person, I really want to have a nice family...He tells me that he loves me, but it seems to be so difficult for him to show that...
What do you see in my horoscope regarding this situation? Do you think that I will be able to find the way to fix all this problems? I don't want to see my daughter unhappy...I don't want to be unhappy too... what do you think about that?
Thank you very much,?
gabituca
Dear gabituca
The astrological comparison that you have with your husband really is quite good. There is some sorrow in an area that deals with children. I believe that his problem is that he was used to living alone and although he craved having a woman in his life a ready made family was not really what he wanted. He fell in love with you and your daughter was something he had to tolerate. It isn?t that he has a bad comparison with her ? in fact it is actually quite favorable however the problem is he can?t wrap his head around the idea of having to deal with the normal life changes that having a teenager around the house brings with it. For you i
Dear Eugenia,
I have written to you a few times before with no answer. I realize you are VERY busy, but please, I desperately need help! My B.T. is 4/9/69 9:31 pm.
Life has been pretty awful since 2000. I've been in love with a married man ever since then -though I've stayed away- but the feelings barely fade between us. He is a fellow Aires 4/19/66 -sorry I have no birth time for him. My mother-9/16/45 had a heart attack in 2000, a source of much grief for me though she is fine now. I lost my job unfairly and was harassed relentlessly at said job in 2000. I was sexually harassed in 2001 at a new job and subsequently left. Then 9/11 happened which was truly the worst. I started another relationship in late 2001 -with a Virgo man- that came to nothing. I've lost quite a few friends in the last year or so, some that I really needed to be rid of but still I wonder why other people have smooth easy friendships that flow well and last forever. I've been unemployed now for over a year and I don't see things getting better. I just turned 34 and I see no upward trend for the future. I can't seem to find my calling in life in any area. The things I want most constantly elude me (Close relationships with family, a partner to walk through life with, beautiful children, a career I love, close friendships, the lifestyle I dream of). What am I doing wrong? Clearly I have lost my way in the universe somehow and I really need some answers. I want to find my soul mate, have kids, do well in business, and have a full, loving, hectic life. Please help me and see what guidance the stars have for me. Thanks so much for your help and your time.
LISA
Hi Lisa
Maybe you should be getting together with the Pisces in my first readers email this week. He is going through similar problems. In your case you have had some rough transits moving through an area that deals with work and friendships and although this is coming to an end it isn't quite over yet. Your predicament regarding your job will change but I must admit it is much better beginning in the fall so if you are interested in picking up added skills in order to take on a new direction or up your earning potential in the area you are already in now is the time to do so. You have been going through a period of change regarding your friends and although it isn't quite over yet it is not uncommon to rid yourself of the dead weight in your life when this type of transit is present. It isn't a bad thing but it does take a lot out of you. Letting go of the past is usually hard even if you are an Aries. You should be getting out and meeting people. Expanding your circle of friends. Trying your hand at the things you enjoy doing and getting involved in something physical that will help you get back on track and use up added energy. With transiting Saturn passing through your eighth house over the next couple of years you are probably not out of the woods with regard to the well being of older family members or the responsibilities that these matters entail. Prepare to give more time to your mother; she will need you by her side.
Being in love with someone who is married usually puts your life in a tailspin for some time however given the fact that he is a fellow Aries and he falls in an area of your chart that deals with social activity and having fun I can see why you were attracted to him but you really must move on. The actual comparison to him wasn't that good and it did indicate emotional mental and physical torment. Signs that are good for you include late Taurus/early Gemini, Leo, Virgo, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Aquarius and Pisces. You are in a high cycle regarding love, romance and having fun over the next little while so get out and meet potential new mates. To go back or even consider your married friend will be detrimental.
Eugenia
