We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I'm am so lost in knowing what love is I'm always making the wrong choices where love is concerned I was born June 26, 1959, at 10:26 PM. I'm in my second marriage and we constantly fight all the time. I got married 6yrs ago after I lost my son who was murdered. I still have such a void and it's still painful to bear. I got married a year later in 1994 on my son's birthday. I thought this guy was the one but I found out things about his life style that bothers me. He was so wrong to hide such a thing from me. I still believe he is hiding more than he has already let out of the closet. He is a Capricorn born Jan 19th 1960.I cannot deal with his lifestyle. He says he is not gay he just likes to wear women's clothes. Back in May of this year I left him because I feel like such a fool to have trusted him. I believed he loved me and now I'm sorry that I was so vulnerable. In 93 when I lost my boy and I was looking for love and comfort I made a huge bad choice. I'm still married to him but things are not right anymore. I care about him because he took care of my daughter and I when I needed someone, but we fight constantly over him wearing women's clothes. I did not get married for this reason. I am so hurt by all this and have been trying to keep it together but I'm emotionally tired. I've been deceived, lied to and hurt. Yes I'm a big fool for getting married after I lost my son. Now I don't know what real love is, who to trust, or what to do. I'm getting so withdrawn my family says you made a vow before GOD when you got married so honor it. Yes I did and had I of known this before I would not be married to him. Please help I don't know what to do.
There is this guy who likes me at work and I told him to get away from me I didn't mean to hurt him he was born February 1st Aquarius man. He knows I'm married and I believe he wants to be more then friends. He is so shy kind and he make me happy to be around him but I didn't tell him that most of the time when he is near me I tremble. I can feel how his heart beats or when something is bothering him I'd love to be friends but its too hard right now. I don't trust to many people right now and I don't want to hurt anyone. Sorry this is so long. I just don't know what to do or who to believe and most of all it hurts not being able to be friends with this guy at work. It has to be this way. He has three wonderful kids but I'm sorry to not be able to help him with advice or anything because I have enough to deal with myself. Can you tell me if the man I'm married to is withholding more secrets I would be appreciative. I'm so afraid to try again but then again I'm married forever so what difference does it make. If Mr. right is still out there he's gonna pass me by. Do you have any help for me?
Desperately Lost
Dear Desperately Lost
The comparison with your husband is not bad. Yes there is some deception in an area regarding his and your beliefs and ethics but that doesn't mean that it can't work. You need to be supportive, talk to him about the way you feel and ask him to go to counseling with you. Regarding your friend at work, you did not mention his year of birth making it difficult for me to assess your comparison however he does fall in an area of your chart that deals with work, secret affairs and probable difficulties that could easily result in you losing your job. I would be extremely careful with your Aquarius friend. If you become intimate with him while you are both still in your present marriages you are never going to be able to trust one another in the future. For now you should be putting more effort into making your marriage work and less into worrying about the man at work.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
Many years ago I consulted an astrologer about my chances of marrying happily, and he replied, "Do you really want to know?" He seemed so evasive and reluctant that I didn't push it. A year or two later I met my husband (9/17/53) and we have been together for nearly fifteen years. I have since learned a little about astrology and decided that the reason the astrologer was so reticent is that I have Neptune in Scorpio in the seventh house. I think this has manifested mostly in my husband's struggles with alcohol; about three years ago he finally made a major effort and got his drinking under control. Unfortunately at the same time-- I wonder if it was the catalyst-- I reconnected with an old friend (11/11/61) who is in the same line of creative work I am. Although this relationship upset my husband I did not give it up. I realize that this person is a friend and not a suitable candidate for husband/father (we have three children) but I cannot convince my husband that is the case, even though I have been faithful to him and the other relationship is somewhat tenuous. Is it that my husband is being super controlling or am I not being honest? If I give up my friend will my husband go back to drinking? The astrology books are not very reassuring on the Neptune in the seventh house thing, so I wonder if I am stuck with relationship weirdness no matter what, or if I would just be better off being a nun. My birthday is 4/4/65, at 6 AM.
Thank you--
"Doomed by Neptune"
Dear "Doomed by Neptune"
First of all your Neptune may be in your seventh house but it is well aspected to your natal Saturn and Pluto and yes it does oppose your Moon and Jupiter as well but don't lose sight of the fact that the Moon is well aspsected to both Saturn and Pluto as well. This should give you an overall positive skew on your relationship capability. Now you are right regarding partners being of an escapist nature but that doesn't mean that you can't have a successful relationship and that your current partner can't pull his act together. This set up can be highly creative sexually if that's where the energy is put and obviously you and your husband did just that, the result being your three children. With your Neptune Jupiter opposition and of course Jupiter being in your first house you can tend to overreact a bit and may not be totally honest with yourself or your partner at an emotional level. I feel that your past acquaintance is really not the issue as you do not match up to him well. As a matter of fact it is more like a sister brother connection and a strained one at that. Your Scorpio friend falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects. As for your husband your comparison was okay but sorrow does prevail especially with regard to his drinking problem. With his natal Neptune in an adverse position to his natal Uranus I believe that he could fall off the wagon from time to time. However, it probably won't be the result of your friendship with your Scorpio friend. Your Scorpio however should only be someone that you deal with as a direct result of work and nothing more. If you want your marriage to work you and your husband will have to work together in order to keep his problem under control. If he can't handle it and continually gets inebriated you will have to make a decision based on what's best for you and your children. Your husband falls in an area of your chart that deals with children and partying and that is probably how things started out some 15 years ago however times have changed and he's going to have to pull up his socks or expect to lose his family.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I was born on October 17th 1946 at 6:20 PM in Toronto. The last few years have been difficult but I've tried to remain hopeful that things will work out. But lately I've read some astrology sites that state this is one of the best times my sign will have for the next 12 years. Since I have no job and little money, few friends, no social life and I'm married to a man I have to take care of because his fondness for alcohol has left him with brain damage, I find it hard to believe these are good times. If it doesn't get any better than this I don't know how I'll cope. Are these supposed to be good times for me?
Tired.
Dear Tired.
None of us consist of just our Sun Sign and this is where astrology can be misinterpreted. You have actually had several years of tough times and although things are starting to improve you still have some problems to deal with. The first thing you have to do is to take the initiative to make the necessary changes in order to improve your life. Even if you feel that you don't want to get into the work force at this time the possibility to do so is present over this next year however you have to do the legwork. If you really don't want to work you should at least volunteer or join an organization you believe in so that you can get out and have some sort of social life and support system happening. Jupiter has just moved into an area of your chart that usually indicates a move or favorable change in your home. You are also in a high cycle where relationships are concerned and if you are sick and tired of taking care of your ailing husband it may be time to institutionalize him. He made the choice to drink himself into oblivion and it's time you stopped being the martyr. You still have a lot of living to do and as long as you sit in the situation that you are in nothing will change. Astrologically speaking I can tell you what you should be doing and when the time is right but you have to take the initiative and make it happen. Get moving girl; you've paid your dues.
Eugenia
