We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle.  Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?

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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.

For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.

I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.

The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:

Article: Too Much Too Young

Dear Eugenia,

I have a problem. I am sixteen years old, and I feel like I am forty. My mother is very sick, and I must take care of her, as well as attend school and achieve honor role. I work part time, but the income just isn't always enough to make ends meet. Lately my marks at school have been slipping... the stress is really getting to me, but I need good marks in order to get a scholarship, so I can get a decent education.

My problem is that my mother is mentally ill. She has the mental capacity of a three year old. I do have older brothers and sisters, but the responsibility of taking care of my mum has been put on my shoulders.

I really need some advice on my situation. A reply would be much appreciated. I was born August 18, 1982 at 7:27 PM.

Thank you,
Moly

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Hi Moly

Your situation is not great and you have all the right in the world to feel sorry for yourself. You must put added pressure on your siblings in order to make them help out. It is their duty to do so. I suggest that you do consider talking to your mother's doctor regarding your options of a nursing home. I fear that if you don't get some support from family members that you may find yourself working full time and putting your education on hold and that would be a shame. Please write back and tell me more about your situation. Where is your father and do any of your siblings still live at home. What are their situations regarding age, marriage, position to help.

Eugenia

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Dear Eugenia,

Thank you for answering my letter. You asked for more information about my family: my father passed away, when I was a little girl... too little to remember him, and after him, my mother never married again. I have eight older brothers and sisters, and though none of them live at home, they all live in the same city. They have their own problems - I am not blaming them for not helping me out... I just wish that they were a little more compassionate about my situation.

As for school, I haven't told any of my teachers about my present situation... although I am thinking that it might help quite a bit. Maybe there are some programs or something outside of school, so I can get a full time job, to support my family.

Well, I really don't know what to say... I am really starting to feel the stress, and none of my brothers or sisters are willing to help me out. I have tried to reason with them... but they have their own lives, and their own problems. I think part of it has to do with the fact, that none of them get along with my mother, they just don't have the patience. Only two of my siblings are married, the rest are either full time workers, or full time students.

Regarding the nursing home issue, I just don't feel right about it, no matter which way I look at it. I love my mum way too much to let anything happen to her. I suppose it would probably be better in the long run, but I am really hesitant about that. I am making it sound as though I have no support. In truth, a very special friend at school has been helping me out. We are in a Social Justice group together (that's how we met), and he's the only other person that knows about my situation. He sometimes comes over to take care of my mum when I am working, and he always has a shoulder to cry on. I just feel kind of bad, because he is such a good friend to me, and I have nothing to offer him except problems.

Thank you once again,
Moly

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Hi Moly

You are offering your friend lots just by being a friend. You should talk to your teachers they may be able to help you out or at least have suggestions as to how you can continue to study and deal with your home situation. You can't give up your education to take care of your mom. She wouldn't want you to. There would still be the issue of how you would take c

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Article: From Stay or Leave

Hi Eugenia

My husband has a drinking problem. He has been able to control this problem for the past 5-6 years. Recently he has begun drinking again and there is starting to be the same kind of mental abuse as he displayed in the past. I am at the age where I do not feel I can repeat and repeat this sort of abuse and lifestyle. Money is also becoming an issue as he continues to drink. He continues to threaten to leave and I am at the point where if not for my financial position, I would put the entire relationship behind me and move on alone. Is this a good idea?.......Please help, he is born July 10, 1951 at 6:30 a.m. and I April 25, 1944, at 10 a.m.

Stay or Leave

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Dear Stay or Leave

I believe that your husband will become worse before he becomes better. The next year and a half will be filled with all sorts of limitations for him regarding health, authority figures, dealing with institutions and so forth. I feel that the past couple of years you have taken the brunt of his obvious lack of control and abuse and now is the time to give him an ultimatum. Should he leave he will go down hill over the course of the next couple of years. Should he seek help it will take him the next couple of years to reform. As for you I feel that the time for change is fast approaching. That you should be seeking help from women's groups and co-dependent organizations in order to get back on your feet and away from him. Your comparison did indicate that there has been love in the past with this man but that was probably a long time ago. There is also sorrow especially where substance abuse is concerned and because of this I feel that even if he does seek help that there will always be the potential for him to slip over and over again. I do not believe that you will ever be able to fully put his abuse behind you and that your reason for staying with this man has more to do with fear of being alone and lack of funds. Your chart indicates that you are youthful and entertaining and that you will be okay if you can only get yourself out of this situation. By all means - if he wants to leave let him go.

Eugenia

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Article: A Bachelor at Heart

Dear Eugenia,

I have been in love with my husband for a very long time. Our relationship has weathered many ups and downs but the past few years have been particularly difficult. He has been unfaithful and is currently unable to make a decision between staying and recommitting to our marriage or not. I was born on april29/55 (@ 5:55pm). He is a Scorpio (November 17/55). With all that we have been through (on a variety of levels) my heart still hopes for an honest chance at happiness. I can't bear this pain.

Together or Not

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Dear Together or Not

I can understand your position. As a Taurus with a strong Cancer and Scorpio influence you don't really relish disruptions of any kind especially when it has to do with your home, family and security. The comparison with your husband was okay but it did lack some pizzazz. He may be a Scorpio but when it comes to love and romance he has his natal Venus in the sign Sagittarius and that is usually an indication that married or not he will always be a bachelor at heart. I think it's time to set him free and get on with your life. You have a lot to offer and can still find love and romance with someone more worthy of your loyalty, dedication and devotion. You need to start doing the activities you used to enjoy, get back into the swing of things. It may be frightening at first but you will be fine. Keep in mind that it can be extremely lonely living with someone who pays little attention to you. You deserve more and you can have it. Your chart indicates that it's time to focus on yourself and your future. I feel that if your husband saw you as a challenge he may want to reconcile, however if I were you, I'd think long and hard before I'd jump into that situation again. You match up well to those born under the signs Taurus, Cancer, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces. Take note that the Scorpio in your husband's chart is what initially attracted you, not the Sagittarius. Another Scorpio with his natal Venus in Scorpio, Capricorn or Virgo would probably match up quite nicely.

Eugenia

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